Gransnet forums


Overweight grandchildren

(14 Posts)
Dracula Wed 18-Oct-23 02:05:28

My daughter and her two teenage boys are all very overweight.
I look after them two evenings a week but I know their overall diet is unhealthy. I worry about type 2 and early onset diabetes.
.should I just distance myself from the problem?

CanadianGran Wed 18-Oct-23 02:38:42

As long as you cook a healthy meal on the days you have them, there isn't a whole lot you can do. Set a good example, and maybe try to get them to be a bit active.

Doodledog Wed 18-Oct-23 07:41:46

The chances of your daughter being unaware of the situation are slim to none. What do you think you could actually do to help, as opposed to distancing yourself? You can’t really distance yourself unless you are already close to the situation. Did you teach her to cook healthy meals when she lived with you? Has she asked you to get involved?

I think the last thing people want is unsolicited advice - particularly when it comes to parenting, as it tends to come across as criticism, and comments about weight are extremely personal.

How much do you see of your grandchildren? If you are cooking for them you could try to introduce healthier foods, but many children will prefer to eat familiar foods, so it might not be easy.

I would say nothing unless she asks for advice, and as others have said, if you are looking after the children maybe do more activities with them.

M0nica Wed 18-Oct-23 08:17:51

All you can do is feed them healthily when they with you and encourage them to learn to cook healthy food for themselves.

It is very hard when we see things like this happening to our children and grandchildren, but no matter how sensibly we may bring our children up, we have no control over the decisions they make in their lives as adults and with their children.

As they say, you can take a horse to water but you cannot make them drink.

Oreo Wed 18-Oct-23 10:42:59

What the other posters say.
Many young people and teenagers are overweight these days.
A combination of take away food, ready meals and generally poor diet and lack of moving about enough.
Don’t give them sweets or treats, just good simple meals.

Hithere Wed 18-Oct-23 11:53:22

People who are overweight are very much aware of it

I would stay out of it unless your daughter involves you directly

Quokka Wed 18-Oct-23 13:47:57

One of my granddaughters was well overweight. I notice she has slimmed down a little now and is merely chubby.

I’d stay out of it but continue to lead by example and cook a tasty but healthy meal for them weekly. But then you probably have the time to buy ingredients and cook. Often working parents don’t have that luxury or they are too tired after a long day. Something to consider?

Quokka Wed 18-Oct-23 13:48:17

Sorry …twice weekly.

Theexwife Wed 18-Oct-23 14:25:40

When you have them could you take them swimming or to do some sort of sport? Maybe they would like it and keep it up regularly.

welbeck Wed 18-Oct-23 14:28:42

do teenagers need babysitting ??

Joseann Wed 18-Oct-23 14:43:45

I think the last thing people want is unsolicited advice - particularly when it comes to parenting, as it tends to come across as criticism, and comments about weight are extremely personal.

I agree. We had an intrusive thread on GN a few years back about Harper Beckham being fat, podgy, chubby, overweight etc. Look at her now. Teenagers and children often like eating the wrong stuff, as do uni students. They will make their own minds up. I'd say nothing.

BlueBelle Wed 18-Oct-23 14:59:36

Theexwife the lady looks after them two evenings a week so probably not able to take them swimming or to sports
Wellbec they could be 13 and 14 and it’s two evenings so they probably do need an adult in the house
I d definitely leave it to the mum unless she asks for help or advice, if she does be supportive not critical of what she cooks

Theexwife Wed 18-Oct-23 15:56:45

BlueBelle pools, gyms and sports halls are open during the evening.

Dracula Wed 18-Oct-23 19:02:52

Thank you all for your messages. This is the reassurance I needed as I’ve avoided saying anything that wd hurt her or spoil our good relationship. I’ll still worry but keep it to myself. Btw, I not baby-sitting I just cook the evening meal and do a few chores two nights a week as she works late.
Thanks again.