Problems with my adult son part 2

I think it would be better for everyone if you just see your son and family and daughter and family separately.
Resist all temptation to be a matchmaker and don’t discuss your daughter with your son and vice versa.
My late MIL drove me mad forever banging on about how wonderful my SIl and children were and trying to make us all friends, it just drove a bigger wedge, since my MIL died we all get on much better.

I would let things settle now Notjustaprettyface your son and daughter need to sort this out for themselves. Pushing the families together is not helpful. Enjoy time with them separately and things may improve. It's hard to see your children at odds with each other I know but you have to leave them to it now.

As dragonfly says it’s not job to fix them. Why would you invite them for lunch when you already know they are at odds.
See them separately and hope they see sense. What you want maybe ideal to you but it’s really up to them maybe they just don’t like each other much which happens in families.

You cannot force a situation where they both come to your house at the same time. You risk losing contact with both your children. Please leave them to sort it out or not. Stop interfering with their relationship or lack of. I understand it's hurtful for you to see your children at loggerheads, but don't bring it up with either of them. Your son is already angry at you.

Hello dragonfly 46
Thanks for your reply
But what do I do about inviting them together for a Sunday lunch. ,which I like to do ?
What if my daughter says she doesn’t want to come ?

I would go to the zoo and try and enjoy it. Unfortunately it is not up to you to fix the relationship between your son and daughter. They need to do that themselves.
You have to accept that they are not going to be best friends however much you would like them to be.
I would keep well out of it, if not you could lose your son.