beautybumble - hope youโre feeling better. And I hope you treated yourself to something nice. I have been thinking of you.
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY
(81 Posts)Hi. Today is my birthday and I've been completely alone all day. I don't usually expect much these days now I'm in my mid 70s, but today I didn't receive a card, a present or even a phone call until after 9pm when my son called. Like most grans I help out a lot. I don't ask them for anything but always there for them anytime. Its only a birthday I know, but it did hit me how so unimportant I am. I search for the best gifts I can find when its their day. I feel so alone. There thats the rant over, I feel better now.
Your post makes me very sad OP ....my Mum was 88 2 weeks ago ...me59 and DD30 drove 100 miles to spend the day with her and took her for lunch at the Ivy ( which she loved) ....last year me DD and DP and DS1 took her to Wales for her birthday in an air bnb ....year before we took her to Alnmouth and all 3 GOD'S came ..... she likely not got that many birthdays left but I will celebrate each and everyone she does have with her .... she got 17 birthday cards this year which is double what I got!
Belated birthday wishes OP ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐
Agree with you totally sweetcakes
A belated Happy Birthday BeautyBumble. Sadly you are not alone! It's a difficult situation to accept and we find all sorts of excuses for our offspring! However, hope springs eternal! Enjoy the rest of your birthday week. 
Very very belated Birthday Greetings 
I hope youโre feeling a little more upbeat now 
So very true Sweetcakes
Sorry its late Beauty Bumble but
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ๐ฅณ๐.
But I'm just going to say this I am so sick and tired of the phrase, well the young lead such busy lives these days well boo hoo and we didn't we worked we cleaned we sorted out our children I worked nights but we didn't forget our parents even now my m-i-l at 92 and in a care home gets visited twice a week and birthdays and Christmas. I am sorry but busy lives just doesn't cut it anymore.
Belated birthday greetings to you 

Happy Birthday Beautybumble. xxx
Nearly all my birthdays both special ones or not have passed as non events. I had my 70th 2 years ago and of the few cards I had not one had 70 on it. I got a clothes voucher off one of my daughters and nothing off the other not even a text. My DH won't even try to go on line and buy me anything. It's a case of if you want something get it. Even when I was younger my ex would tell me to go and buy myself a card. My 25th wedding anniversary was in the middle of covid so that was a non event and likewise every other anniversary.
You're not on your own Beautybumble.
M0nica
A belated happy birthday,
However I was horrified by your phrase I don't ask them for anything but always there for them anytime.
I think you should immediately cease both not asking for aanything and always being there for your children. With the best intentions in the world, you have ended up with children that treat you like a door mat.
So use your birthday to make a new resolution and next time your children automatically assume you will look after their children while they go out on the town, say 'no' because you have booked a meal out, a visit to a show or even just an early night.
And next year when your birthday comes, remind your children it is coming and ask them where they are going to take you out to, to celebrate the event.
it is sad but true when someone unselfishly lets other people walk over them, all they do is wipe their feet on them, and it is children of devoted parents who are ones most likely to do that.
Loe and devotion should be a two-way street.
I agree, book yourself a day out on your next birthday & donโt always make yourself available.. that will give them a jolt. We become invisible to the younger generation, but our day is their tomorrow. Big happy birthday BTW ๐ค
So sad. A few years ago I was on my own, I had a few friends, but they didn't know it was my Birthday. I made myself a cake. Sent a text message to my friends asking if they would like to come round for a cuppa and cake. They were cross that I didn't mention in the text that it was my Birthday but I didn't want them rushing out to buy cards and presents. We had a lovely tea party. I know it's too late now, but perhaps next year you could try something similar. It is so hurtful when your own family don't remember your Birthday, but I am sort of used to it now, although I still get that sinking feeling as my Birthday approaches, knowing that the mantlepiece will be empty.
Belated Birthday greetings beautybumble I understand just how you felt. Hopefully all the good wishes on here will help and maybe more sunny weather will help you feel better too.
I know you want to help your family out but perhaps start to do a little less and make more time for yourself. You had better have treated yourself too as you deserve it. All the best.

And belated Birthday wishes from me too !
Sounds to me that you need to concentrate on yourself and your needs a bit more.
All the very best !
Happy Birthday dear beautybumble. Book yourself a Spa day next year. ๐ฐ๐น๐บx
It's a real shame that your son didn't take advantage of it being Father's day and have a joint celebration.. I would really take him to task for his thoughtlessness.. no matter how busy he is I think this is inexcusable and would definitely rethink how you are prepared to help them in the future.. I agree with others about treating yourself though..
Happy belated birthday from me beautybumble I can understand you feeling hurt because I know I would be but always remember you are important your DC and DGC would not be here without you so go and treat yourself to whatever you want and can afford and celebrate your special occasion all week long you deserve it ๐๐๐๐พ๐ฅ๐ค
It is hard to have slipped down the pecking order but inevitable I think. I am just waiting for a friend to join me for a drink and some nibbles to mark her late DHโs birthday. We do this and go out for a meal on what would have been our wedding anniversaries - it takes the load from our DC and allows us to share memories with someone in the same position. It has become a really nice tradition.
Dear beautybumble and everyone else feeling lonely and neglected, close your eyes for a minute and imagine a great big hug from me xxx
Belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY beautybumble.
Know exactly how you must feel, afterall your birthday is the same date every year and should never be forgotten or ignored.
Perhaps you could buy a 2025 calendar for your DS family, pre-marked with a heavy red (other colours available) ring marking the date, maybe even a reminder the week before. No excuses then,
[ cupcake]
Happy birthday, sorry it's late only just seen it. Children and grandchildren get caught up.in their own day to day worlds but I'm sure they would be sad to know that you were so upset. So treat yourself and enjoy shat you buy. ๐
Belated Happy Birthday fellow Gemini! It's mine today.
Belated happy birthday wishes from me too BeautyBumble.
I think too many excuses are made for thoughtless adult children. It doesn't take long for a call or message and means so much.
Plan something nice for your next birthday. 

Belated happy birthday wishes BeautyBumble 
Lovely post grandtante.
Happy belated birthday beautybumble.
I feel for you, itโs never nice to be ignored. Next year book yourself a nice relaxing massage or facial, and then ask a friend to join you for afternoon tea or lunch. Also buy yourself a gift, some new perfume or makeup, a new handbag or shoes, whatever makes you feel happy. The weekend before, or after, ask your son and his family to join you at home for a little celebration, a little tea or lunch. Donโt make yourself a lot of work, just buy as much as can from M+S or another supermarket. They canโt ignore you then can they?
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