Unfaithful husband?

You have posted several times over the years about your poor relationship with her husband.

To be frank, it is you who are sexualising this.

If he did buy this as a gift for the cleaner why hasn’t she taken it home? It sounds more ornament than practical. I suspect she’s more comfortable drinking tea from a mug while she’s at work. It’s not on display but neither is it hidden if it’s in a cupboard that everybody uses.

The whip is probably unconnected. A friend’s husband was once given a whip in a Secret Santa. It was meant to signify that he was a tough boss and cracked the whip over his employees. Nothing sexual about it. If he kept it I’m sure it was just put in a cupboard and forgotten or more likely the bin.

My question is - rather than torture yourself, asking for advice from strangers on a social media platform why not just speak to the people in the household? Presumably there other things cluttering up the cupboard(s) and Spring approaches. Put the offending items in a cardboard box with some other kitchen clutter and ask your husband and cleaner if there’s anything they want before you take it all to the charity shop.

A quite innocent story may emerge of a gift bought and never given or a gift given long ago and forgotten. True, people do sometimes develop crushes and buy unwanted gifts for the object of their unwanted affections. It happens but no need to work it up into something it may not and may never have been.

Hello, ClareAB. Have you considered hiding the cup, and the cane, to see if there's any reaction from your husband or even the cleaner? Any subtle changes in their attitudes etc? Or, perhaps, drop little hints to her in some way, maybe a conversation about schooldays and how teachers used the cane etc.

I don't think outright confrontation is the best approach, especially if it's all completely innocent, but see if you can gauge their reactions without being too blunt.

Apologies ClareAB. I didn’t mean to be unkind . Like others I was doubting if it was a serious post then your 2nd post crossed with my stupid one.

Sorry 💐

Maybe they enjoy a nice cuppa after the kink? Probably quite tiring at that age.

Sounds like to makings of a Mills and Boon novel 🤣🤣

I’m surprised by how unkind this became. The mockery, sexualisation and ridicule feels like a Mean Girls pile-on rather than adults talking. I came here in good faith at a time when I'm looking at the end of my marriage and all that entails. I have great women friends in my life, and made the mistake that as Grans very little can shock us. Well I am shocked at the nastiness here. Has gransnet been taken over by MAGA or American Christian Nationalists?

Set up surveillance camera?

Is it possible he’s secretly practising a juggling act and is spinning the cup and saucer aloft on the headmaster’s cane?

Like a kink in a hosepipe? That sort of kink?

Picture not people cutter🙄

Oh. No. Don’t answer that one.

People cuter entered head almost immediately 😱

I know it sounds ridiculous but I promise you it's not made up. Truth being stranger than fiction. I'm sitting here in my home, thinking how it all looks the same, but everything has changed. I have 3 married sons who are amazing, but there's no way I can talk to them about it. Ooof! I'm a writer in real life, there is no way I would write something as ridiculous as this. But there's no way I can convince anyone really so...

Where does the teacup come into it?

I can’t quite get the picture 🤣🤣🤣

Get the cane and spank him as he has been a very, very bad boy.

kittylester

Or go and bother some other forum.

Hear hear!

Or go and bother some other forum.

Hmmm. If you’re worried show him what you found and say ‘shall we talk about this?’
Or leave it where it is and lose all trust in your husband and cleaner.
Not sure if this is a real post, others think not, but I suppose life often is stranger than fiction.
I would ask him.

I do not believe this is genuine!

Oh really?

If this is genuine, bring it down and when he's there give it your cleaner as a 'thank you'.

Do I believe this ???