Let's talk dating apps with Lumen

I used a dating app I thought things where going so well she was in another country we exchanged pictures this was 5 years ago this went on for about 2 months she was gorgeous she was 35 and me at the time I was 50 years old so I thought wow can’t believe how lucky I was then a friend of mine said she’s a scam I told him to go away she was coming over to see me then two days later she says that so one robbed her and she was so desperate to see me and would I send her £1000 so she was able to come as a div I did never heard anything since so I have never used one since

My daughter was in a couple of relationships in her 20’s that fizzled out, and she later discovered the Tinder Dating App. Joining and not really taking it too seriously, she met a couple of men who appeared to be decent lads, but they discovered that they wanted different things from life ( career wise) so these relationships didn’t last long either. She finally met “The One” three years ago on Tinder. He lived in a county nearby about thirty miles away. They bought a home together a year ago, got engaged in the summer of 2019 and are getting married this month. Love can find you on dating apps- if it is meant to be. I have a male family friend in his late 50’s who really struggles finding love on Dating Apps though sadly. He is a great bloke, however has very high standards and nobody quite fits his requirements. He isn’t really very flexible and has never been married, although was once engaged and has a child from this relationship. My heart breaks for him because I think he fears being alone and misses the company of a woman in his life. He joined lots of dating agencies but has never found Ms Right.

Some humour is probably called for.

Actually I have the greatest of admiration for anyone who gets themselves back out there.

Boumas thanks for sharing your story.
painting

Learning to date again can be daunting but also exciting whether it's internet dating or other sources ( whatever they might be )
I used a dating site some 18months after my husband passed away and had some truly dire dates , some interesting dates and just when I was about to give up I met a man who became my husband and I really thought God had saved him for me to make up for some dodgy relationship decisions that I had made in the past...we had a lot of fun and really were good together.
Unfortunately within a year of us meeting he had been diagnosed with lung cancer and was gone before our first wedding anniversary...
That was 8 years ago in December of this year and I have considered trying again but I'm just not sure that I can make the effort because believe me it does take a lot of effort.
I guess it depends just how much you want to be with someone.
Dating sites work ...of course they do but you do need to be careful...manage your expectations,,,but don't settle for just anyone because you don't want to be alone
Being with the wrong one is much worse...if you are up for it go for it...enjoy and have fun...
Phew that's me done for now...good luck.

I'm currently using a dating app. Don't take everything that is written as the truth, pictures can be decades old, and short men lie about their height!. I've had a few dates, but I'm going to be much more selective in who I spend my spare time with. Using an app is ideal if you are busy. You can dip in and out when you want and can control the pace you go at (though be prepared for pushy men wanting to meet up straight away, give you their mobile then strop when you've not texted them, or want to move to quickly onto WhatsApp). I've had to make use of the block button twice, but always remember don't give out too many personal/family details, and you can always take a break, hide your profile if you need a break.

I have been married 38 years but used to write to personal ads when a 20 something divorcee, which was a bit hit and miss. A lot of boring men who drove miles into the country for half a lager. Some were very well off. Some very good looking. In my 30's I set up an international dating agency which was quite successful. Closed down during a recession. Two of my clients got married at Gretna Green.

I have friends who have used the apps. They have had the most success with those focused on mutual interests such as walking or sports.

I guess my ' dating app ' could of potentially been the firstborn it's kind. Yahoo chatrooms !
We have been together 20 years and met whilst general chatting in a chatroom, which we a big thing back in the 1990s.
I'm not sure about these swipe left/ swipe right apps because for me they seem a little impersonal.

I don't think that I would ever use one, perhaps just too old fashioned. I could only envisage ever meeting someone in natural circumstances.

Found a couple of good friends on the dating apps (Saga, a.k.a. Classic FM particularly), so not a waste of time - but a bloody expensive passtime for not too much reward. Have given up, at least for the moment.
Free sites, like PoF, are full of scammers in my experience - some nice guys too, but picking the good guys out of the morass is a PITA; and the scammers are very clever.
Haven't tried this Lumen thing. Might give it a go, when I'm feeling less cynical / more lonely...

I’ve considered online dating, but talked myself out of it. I’ve researched it at length and read so many horror stories, which unfortunately seem to out weigh the success stories. I would truly love to meet someone special, however, I just do not want to commit to the time and effort to sieve thro online sites. I’d like to meet my Mr Right thro chance meetings in everyday life. Of course I’m aware that people can be dishonest and misleading even thro this avenue. In an ideal world online dating should be the perfect arena to meet a like minded soul, however, the world we live in is full of people with ulterior motives and dating sites do give them the perfect route to meet vulnerable and lonely people.

For me a total success. I started using Encounters dating site more as a distraction than anything else after the breakup of a very long relationship. I met a few men, all perfectly nice but not for me. Then I met the absolute love of my life and five years down the line I do not have one moment’s regret.
Nothing ventured....

After a 20 yr abusive relationship and 10 yrs being single living alone, I realised I preferred being in a couple. I joined loads of dating websites, it was a nightmare. Initially you get bombarded with 100's of messages, so just the admin of replying to them all is very time consuming. 99% are married just looking for a leg over. The other 1% well, it soon becomes apparent WHY they are still single. Nowadays they are adept at knowing what to say to win you over to achieve their end game, it was an emotional roller coaster of let-downs. Plus all the time invested chatting online, and over the phone, arranging meet ups trying to find an honest genuine person. It almost broke me, I gave up in the end as I did not have anymore emotional energy to waste on them. I took down all my ads, went on holiday and decided to accept I would be a lonely spinster, when I finally met someone - they say when you stop looking you meet someone and it is true! Been married years now.

I have never used and would be unlikely to - you hear such terrible stories. I'd rather try and meet someone from participating in activities.

I’ve been married for 38 years and so have no use for them but I strongly support them My daughter used one and has been married now to a lovely man also happened with my daughters friend. With work/life balance so off kilter with young people working full time it’s hatd to get to meet people

I signed up to one because my friend talked me into it. I wasn't particularly bothered about meeting anyone as I was content being single. Anyway, after a few random weird messages etc, I did meet someone, we emailed and chatted on the phone several times and arranged to meet. He turned up and we had a fabulous evening, clicked and shared the same warped sense of humour. I moved in with him after 6 weeks, we then bought our house together and have been together over 12 years, 6 of them as married. We have a great relationship and long may it continue.

Everyone seems to do things online nowadays so why not dating?! Not for me tho' cos I'm happily married.

When I was divorced many thousand of years ago I used a dating magazine ( that’s how long ago) I suppose that was the forerunner of the dating sites I didn’t find any success and found it all a bit daunting travelling to a strange town to meet up in a strange bar Only did it a few times and the men seemed far too intent on ‘finding someone (anyone)’

TwinLolly wow! That's quite something

Dating apps, a great idea but an absolute minefield. I've joined a few, talked with a few, saw some I knew who were married oh and had to block quite a few who thought I needed to see their private member . Well I'm no prude and a little bit anxious but found this a turn off. I only met one hour for a breakfast date and he seem a nice guy, similar to myself but no chemistry on either side. My nephew has married his tinder meet and they have a growing family. I've heard of success stories so I'm not totally out off. Met my current sweetheart playing online games so not currently using. It's hard to meet people but it isn't a first hit success rate. If everyone was honest it would be great but it's great if you just be sensible and cautious, dating shop be fun.

I have no need for a dating app, but am delighted that one of my foster sons met his wife through a Christian dating site and another dear friend is now 'courting' (do we still say that?) having met a very lovely widower through a dating app.

I havent been brave enough although my friend has had great success through the dating site on Classic FM

I never tried dating apps but I did go onto 2 or 3 online dating websites. Unfortunately I got answers from men with untoward ideas.

Eventually I tried a totally different friendship website (naturist friendship website) and after a few months chatting online with one chap, we finally got to meet up. He was a true gentleman during my weekend visit (I flew to France because he was living there at the time, and he said I could bring friends if I wanted to).

That weekend changed our lives. We liked each other, wanted to see each other again, and over time love grew.

He proposed on a glacier in Alaska (no engagement ring but he used a tiny glass slipper - Cinderella style - because I've got small feet!) and we got married (naked) in the Namibian desert - just us, a wonderful priest and a photographer, as well as quadbike personnel who kindly let us do their 'sunset champagne tour' for our marriage. So we had champagne and nibbles after our vows.

Dating apps and websites have their ups and downs, and people have to be very careful because there are many out there who are not who they say they are. If I did go out on a date - I always ensured it was a public place. However I did throw caution to the wind when flying out to France. My gut feeling told me I would be fine. Fortunately it all turned out for the better. Nearly 3 years happily married now.

If I where interested in looking for a new partner (which I am not) I would never consider a dating app all the bad press about them would frighten me off,false photographs and false profiles in a lot of them I tend to think,my favourite app was my sister who introduced me to mr.glamma 45+ yrs ago it was second time around for both of us and we have had very few hiccups during that time I don't think I would ever find anyone like him again.

I have dabbled on various dating sites, I met some lovely people, however, I also came across quite a few liars, cheats, conmen and those out for what they can get.

I find the friendship sites a better starting place.

Am not looking for anyone at the moment