Gransnet forums

Sponsored discussions

   Please note: This topic is for discussions paid for by Gransnet clients. If you'd like to have your own paid for discussion thread, please feel free to mail us at [email protected]. If you are a journalist, start-up or student and you want to request feedback from gransnetters, please post in Media Requests.

Find out how Gransnetters helped their DC get on the property ladder

(237 Posts)
LucyBGransnet (GNHQ) Tue 17-Dec-19 09:52:30

This sponsored discussion is now closed

From helping raise the deposit for their first home to helping them find the perfect curtains for their living room, parents support their children in creating their dream home in various ways. We want to find out if you’ve considered or have already helped your DC get on the property ladder and how you went about it.

So we are asking you how did support your children buying a home, if at all, and roughly when this was? Who started the conversation about helping them? What did you use to help them - your savings, using your existing assets and property, getting a loan, inheritance, tapping into your pension or another way? Was it in the form of gift, loan or early inheritance and what did the agreement terms looked like, if any?

Did you seek legal advice and formalise the process? If so, how easy was it to sort out the legal side of helping them out? What emotional or rational considerations did you take into account and if you could, how would you change the process of helping them buy their first home?

Whether you have considered, are currently helping or have already helped your DC, post your thoughts on the topic on the thread below. All GN users who leave their opinion will be entered into a prize draw where 1 lucky winner will get a £150 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck,
GNHQ

Terms and conditions apply

Fernbergien Sat 28-Dec-19 10:17:39

I have always been good with money but not had that much.. When my two sons in their twenties decided to buy a house between them we did not give money. What we did was give them most of our household goods ie cooker etc and replaced our own. Also bedding etc. I also picked up the odd bargain for them. They were given a few things from friends. Being good with money certainly rubbed off as they have substantial houses each which were paid off in there forties. They bought their joint house in the late eighties then went separate ways.

Dublin29 Sat 28-Dec-19 10:02:56

I too was never in a position to help my son & daughter in law with a home. But son was left a small amount of £ by a grandparent, they used that to rent first home & pay a year in advance. Then son’s Mother-in-law gave them about £25 K towards buying a home. They struggled to get a suitable place, as both disabled since birth, dil a wheelchair user.

TM12 Fri 27-Dec-19 19:53:59

We live in the south of England and our children have no hope of buying their own home, as the property is so expensive, unless they have very highly paid jobs or inherit some money. Consequently they have to live at home with their partners trying desperately to save a deposit. It is so sad because if they lived in the north of the country this would not be such a problem.

grannyactivist Fri 27-Dec-19 11:13:28

We helped two of our children with deposits and are preparing to help a third. One deposit has already been repaid and the second will be repaid within the next two or three years.

katynana Fri 27-Dec-19 10:46:10

We, after much discussion and research, took the plunge and a sizeable chunk of equity out of our home this summer to enable us to purchase a house for one of our daughters to live in. She has 3 children and is separated from her husband and not particularly happy in the flat we had found for her to rent when the little family moved right across the country to be near us and the offer of help with childcare. As said childcare, schools, place of employment and suitability of accommodation, parking and a garden space all had to be factored in to the equation it took a little while but she was lucky enough to find a place we could ´afford´ in a relatively convenient location.
Once purchased the house was practically ´gutted´ and a great team of tradesmen swarmed all over it to make it habitable. Still not completed (painting is ongoing but it keeps OH occupied if sometimes exhausted) they have been living there for 1/2 a school term now and are quite content.
A new Will has to be written to ensure that, in the event of our demise, she/they become the owners of this house without unduly depriving her siblings of their ´shares´.
This was definitely not on our list of ´to do´s´ but seemed to to be the best option available under the circumstances. The plan is to repay the equity taken under the´lifetime mortgage´ system so in 15 years we may, once more, be mortgage free. Fingers crossed.

wildchild Fri 27-Dec-19 09:28:23

From the get-go I've encouraged them as soon as they were earning to have a splurge with the first pay packet then save HARD to get themselves something cheap and rent it out to someone. With the mortgage being met, they then concentrate on a larger deposit (to include sale of the rental property in a couple of years when it's accrued more value). It works!

Rachand Thu 26-Dec-19 18:44:26

We gave our dd £5000 towards the deposit of her first house 18 months ago, she is single so it would of taken her longer to get her deposit together if married or with a partner. It was a gift. (I remember my father in law giving us money towards furniture when we bought our first place, just as well as I think we would of slept on the floor! ) The money we gave her might not sound a lot but it made a big difference to her.

creativeness Tue 24-Dec-19 16:52:17

When daughter was a student @uni. we helped her @ then fiance with deposit for first property. When son split from long-term partner suddenly late husband was unwell & just helped out with buying new cooker as he had to start from scratch with hardly nothing

Moocow Mon 23-Dec-19 22:48:41

I have considered helping since they started to talk about careers. I've always placed a great deal on being sensible with your money and being happy rather than you driven by money. I hope one day I might be able to help in practical ways if financial means are not a possibility and they are able to go down the buying a property route.

Lisapaige24 Mon 23-Dec-19 02:30:49

I gave my daughter my first house I ever bought as she wanted to live in that area but couldn’t afford to and I moved to the bungalow I bought with my late husband am glad I could help as the house is perfect for her and my grandchildren and it made sense for it to stay in the family

GeminiJen Sun 22-Dec-19 15:59:39

I helped my daughter with a substantial amount of money after her divorce. This meant that she was able to afford a decent home for herself and young children. I had downsized a few years previously so had the money as savings. She was reluctant at first but accepted that it would come to her in due course so why not now when she needed it. She had her mortgage with a Bank and I was required to sign a document to say that this was a gift. Simples...

Stmiddy Sun 22-Dec-19 10:48:57

I know how young people struggle to get onto the property ladder nowadays so, after my parents passed away, I decided to use my inheritance to part-fund the purchase of a second rental property. Currently it is self-funding and the intention is that, after university, my daughter will have somewhere to live.

Yolostela Sun 22-Dec-19 08:50:53

Both my children managed to buy their own houses without our financial help.

Rabbitgran Sun 22-Dec-19 08:36:50

My daughter and son graduated at the same time from university around the millennium. I had an ISA which had matured and gifted them £5,000 each which in those days was enough for a deposit on a pleasant ish terraced house in the North. I was pleased to help them on to the property ladder but both are renting now which is frustrating! Both had relationship break ups and were not keen to keep their houses, preferring to realise the cash. I have had to help one child a lot since and the other one a bit and though I would never let them down, I find it tough. I am in my mid 60s and can't afford to retire due to the financial help I give. I think that eventually, I will probably have to move to a larger house so that I can take my family in. I know that I am lucky to have this option.

Candelle Sun 22-Dec-19 01:58:37

or even ... deposit!

Candelle Sun 22-Dec-19 01:57:46

We were in the fortunate position of being able to buy houses for our children (coming up to 20 years ago).

Our thoughts were that they could have it then and make good use of it, or have it after we die and pay a considerable inheritance tax on it

It was a risk as our sons-in-law could have taken half of it should there have been divorces but happily that hasn't happened.

The children are appreciative but once the money was given we said it would not be mentioned again. We didn't want to 'hold' it over them.

If you trust your children and have the money, I recommend doing this.

Our own first house was taken on a 32 year mortgage with rates at over 15%. We were also very young (my fiance has to wait for his 21st birthday to sign the document). We saved every penny for a year to scrape together the necessary desposit and for varying reasons, had no parental help whatsoever.

I think it is much harder for young people today but feel that some don't appreciate that some sacrifices are necessary to make the property ladder. My heart goes out to those on minimum wage;. I am sure it must be a horrible struggle.

flowersfromheaven Sat 21-Dec-19 22:06:40

My daughter and partner bought their first house this year after renting for a while I gave them some money to help them with new flooring all through the house and new blinds, I think it's hard to get everything you need straight away that's why help out x

M0nica Sat 21-Dec-19 20:38:29

blueskies Why should they? Both of DD's properties were/are ex council. What should she have done, refused to but an ex-council house, at a time when they were the only property she could afford and continue renting until such time as even they were out of her price range?

Or were you thinking of the original buyers, most of those, as now, could only afford to own their own house because of the discount they got.

The fault is the fault of successive governments for failing to make sure that for every house sold, one, or possibly two, were built and for them to provide the finance for this to happen.

Catmanic Sat 21-Dec-19 20:35:01

We have helped our son this year by giving money to him and his partner to set up the new ISA, which is available to first time buyers. I would love to contribute more and will give money on an ad hoc basis.

blueskies Sat 21-Dec-19 20:26:53

All these council properties sold and taken out of housing stock. Do the purchasers feel any guilt? Not really a level playing field is it. Just saying.......

Kaggi60 Sat 21-Dec-19 19:45:57

We started help my DS to build a nest egg so they can go on the property ladder let her save her wages and work hard. Have tried to buy but people keep putting the price of houses out of reach. They put the houses up by another £3,000 so if they see something they have to look straight away.

Seakay Sat 21-Dec-19 19:30:24

I haven't been in a position to help children or grandchildren as I have none, but I was able to help my sister and b-i-l to buy a property at auction by giving them money towards the price so that b-i-l didn't have to cash in his pension. Interest rates has gone to nothing and they couldn't get a mortgage so it was sensible for all of us.

Liz08 Sat 21-Dec-19 18:51:29

We have two children who are now in their mid forties, only a year separates them. Around their 21st birthdays (1994) we put a deposit on a house near to their universities (almost all our savings at that time). They both lived there for a few years and rented out two rooms which covered the mortgage payments.
The agreement was that when one of them wanted to move away the other would buy them out or they would sell the house and split the proceeds.
After several years my son got married and wanted to buy his sister's share at the going market price - there had been a big rise in the market by then so we, mum & dad (without being asked), stepped in and contributed so that everything was fair and both had a manageable mortgage.
I estimate that in total we gave them both about 100k to get them on the housing market ladder. We don't regret any of it, it was all our suggestion and our choice. When I hear of the crippling amounts that some of their friends have to pay for their mortgages I'm so glad we did it. They always appreciated our help.
Through sheer hard work and prudence, we're both comfortable and happy in our retirement and pleased to have helped our children without them waiting to inherit.
On reflection, I realize that the original arrangement could have gone so wrong, but it didn't and anyway we would have both tried our best.

Bruciebaby Sat 21-Dec-19 18:31:01

What little I have I love to share.

pipsaucer Sat 21-Dec-19 17:43:37

Sadly it hasn't been an option as not in a financial position to do so but really it's much better to let them make their own way in life and be strong independent people..That's what I tell myself anyway!