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What do you like to be called?

(101 Posts)
Blondehedgehog Sat 21-Nov-15 11:29:01

When I was growing up I was taught that people much older than me should be addressed by their title e.g Mr or Mrs...... Now, when dealing with shops, firms, office staff etc. I am addressed by my first name, and I don't like it. I think in the first instance you should be addressed 'Mr or Mrs' and asked it is OK to use your first name. And I say NO.
Am I being too old fashioned?

felice Sat 21-Nov-15 15:15:21

Here it is always Madame, which I like, even during a long stay in a convalescent Hospital when I knew all the nurses first names I was still addressed as Madame.
Also very handy if like me you are rubbish at remembering peoples namesconfused

Cherrytree59 Sat 21-Nov-15 15:41:03

I have dropped Mrs and always give full name (not middle). When someone calls from a store ,bank etc I expect them to use full name and then if they ask to use my christian name I say ok unless I'm cross with them!
What I hate is to get a birthdday/ xmas card printed with my first name from a store. With voucher for five pounds off providing I spend a certain amount with them!

Katek Sat 21-Nov-15 15:55:30

All friends, sil and dil call me by diminutive of first name, whilst acquaintances call me by my first name. Anyone else it's Mrs... I have a tendency to call older chaps 'sir' for some reason. Don't know if that's forces background or if I've gone a bit Dixon of Dock Green-ish in my dotage!

loopylou Sat 21-Nov-15 16:05:40

I don't think I mind.....unless it's a cold caller on the phone calling me by my first name in which case I hate it!

Teetime Sat 21-Nov-15 16:53:58

I get called by my first name by everyone who knows me and I introduce myself as such. DH has a twist on that he likes to use. I love to be called Aunty but DN is getting so grown up and taller than me he is bound to drop it soon. DH has only ever wanted to be called by his forename - doesn't like to be called uncle by his DN's. I like DD1 and DD2 to call me Mummy but only DD2 does this when she wants something DD1 says its silly! I really really don't like being called a guy though- I think I might have said that before. smile

mollie Sat 21-Nov-15 17:48:09

Gosh! I thought the op was just one of those idle chattery type threads we have so often. Anya's reaction (and retort) was way off beam! I'm shockedconfused

Leticia Sat 21-Nov-15 17:57:18

I like my first name.
It is lovely after teaching for my whole career and being Mrs..... to now working with schools, doing workshops and being able to be Leticia.
I don't like cold callers on the phone using it- it sounds silly because they always use my full name when I don't.
Apart from that first for anyone- and couldn't stand children putting 'auntie' in front when I am not an auntie.
I am getting my actual nephews and nieces to drop the auntie - I don't want to get stuck like my mother with a 75yr old calling her auntie! ( and unable to change despite my mother trying)

rosequartz Sat 21-Nov-15 17:57:47

The reason I wanted to be a teacher when I was a little girl was so that I'd be called 'Miss Quartz' or 'Mrs Whatever'.
I changed my mind as I grew up

granjura Sat 21-Nov-15 18:07:30

Yes I find it a bit much when people call you by your first name in non personal situations (people trying to sell you stuff for instance) - but otherwise I like the use of first name rather than Mrs X! Here I am on the board of several charitable trusts including 2 Museums- and I am amazed at the formality of it all and still calling each other 'Monsieur Y' and 'Madame X' - despite working on projects together for several years ....

granjura Sat 21-Nov-15 18:09:15

rosequartz, it was always a real treat for our 6th Formers to be allowed to call us by our first name from Year 12.

Jane10 Sat 21-Nov-15 18:21:45

My grandparents always referred to long term close friends as Miss this or Mr that. We used to think it was funny but now it seems delightfully old fashioned. Thinking about Jane Austen characters, wives used to refer to husbands as Mr this etc. As we're clearly deteriorating nomenclature wise will the next generation start to call people by the first letter of their names? Just an idle thought! J10

rosequartz Sat 21-Nov-15 18:29:50

I always called our neighbours by their formal names when I was growing up - and I think that my DP did too. Even the next door neighbours were always known as Mr and Mrs B*

granjura I remember when DS was in the 6th form and used to play tennis with the deputy head - he came home and said Mr J said I can call him M!! I'm not sure I can. grin

I always call my dentist by her first name, so why not the GP?

Ana Sat 21-Nov-15 18:31:14

I don't think it would go down very well at my surgery...grin

Coolgran65 Sat 21-Nov-15 18:59:21

I always addressed my parents in law as Mr M and Mrs M. For 25 years. As did their other dil.

Coolgran65 Sat 21-Nov-15 19:22:40

Their choice.

rosequartz Sat 21-Nov-15 20:15:56

shock

I called my MIL Mum, but we often refer to her by her Christian name - there was only one of her, I know of no-one else of the same name grin)

thatbags Sat 21-Nov-15 20:26:35

I don't think I notice what people call me, or maybe I notice but don't care so long as they are being polite. I would notice if they were being impolite even if they were quite formal in their way of addressing me. I don't think formality is a sign of politeness so much as a sign of formality. Some people prefer that. Some people don't give a damn about formality.

Politeness is separate and even people who don't call one by one's preferred addressment (!) can still be being polite.

thatbags Sat 21-Nov-15 20:28:12

Etiquette! That's the word I was looking for! Etiquette is quite broad nowadays. And it's also separate from politeness.

annodomini Sat 21-Nov-15 20:33:48

Sorry Ana and Anya for getting you confused. It's probably not for the first time. confused

Ana Sat 21-Nov-15 20:42:34

No, it certainly isn't anno! grin

rosesarered Sat 21-Nov-15 21:25:12

I used to be wary of ' the first name thing' years ago, but am well used to it now and don't mind, after all, it is our name, and often Mrs Whatsit does seem a bit stuffy.

aggie Sat 21-Nov-15 21:35:00

Mrs O is my nickname in the Bowling club , and I like it , not too formal smile

Bellanonna Sat 21-Nov-15 21:37:17

I echo your post exactly Henetha. I welcome being called by my first name, it just feels friendly. I grew up when my parents called everyone Mr or Mrs and much prefer this first-name approach. I book a restaurant table in my first name, and call my dentist by his first, and vice versa.
Btw I think we had this topic just a few months back ?

Indinana Sat 21-Nov-15 21:37:34

As a child I always addressed neighbours and other grown-ups as Mr and Mrs. I can even remember married couples referring to each other as Mr and Mrs, as in "Mr Smith always tells me that....", not "My husband always tells me that...." Nowadays that seems old-fashioned to the point of quaintness.
I don't think using one form of address is any more polite in itself than another. Politeness is in the manner of the speaker, not the words themselves.

Bellanonna Sat 21-Nov-15 21:41:13

I read Henetha's comment on the first page. I didn't read on, so hers was several posts back. I must concentrate !