You know everyone, you have helped me thank you,l thought no one would reply.This is why i cant sleep,how could she do this, yes she is a selfish girl. They sign tomorrow on the divorce papers and to protect the girls my son has made sure she signes for him to have full custody, but if she goes she goes, no return. She has packed the girls small clothes to take for her next family, can you believe. They have told the girls she is goingto look after her nanny said shes ill,they are ok with that but the next step we wil have to get professional advice. I would never have thought she would do this she has been a good capable mom, until she went to thailand on holiday to see her family 3 months ago. We are a close family and very close to the grand children we have always been in their lives.We will have to live very close to one another and support him.They both go to school.I am 65 so worried that l will cope (i have spinal challenges). My son just wants her gone now and says she can't mess with their emotions. No facetime etc; and the girls saying when you coming home mommy. I try and console myself thinking she doesn't deserve them if she can do this. But i just can't come to terms with her actually going. How can she be with them now knowing what she is going to do. She is not the daughter in law i once knew. i have been her surrogate mom. This is helping to put this to print, thank you to all for your input.