Dilemma

Dog vs new baby - the baby wins every time for me!!!

I'm afraid I would also choose the baby myself.

I can understand your dilemma Juney64. We live quite close to a G D B training centre and several of my friends have adopted either the puppies who don't make it to become guide dogs or the retired dogs. (I also know loads of doting GPS too). I would ask the rehoming centre if you could delay the adoption until you return home as there may be a chance. If not does it really matter if you visit right now instead of four weeks time? Surely your son will understand, I do hope so. Have you been able to Skype your GS up till now?

Have a good chat with the Guide Dog charity.....will they really take you off the list for such a one-off event?

I'd choose the dog

I'd choose the dog as well, although I'm not particularly fond of them! I just think that it would be a shame to miss this opportunity to rehome a retired guide dog which you would love and care for, and would give both you and your DH so much pleasure.

Surely your son and DIL would understand if you postponed your visit for a few weeks if you explained?

Baby..... I m afraid it would be no contest but that's me personally but in your instance I would be very persuasive to your husband to do you a big favour and take on the dog in your absence I will add that if I was having a baby and my mum chose to stay with a new dog I d be very upset and the moment would be lost

The dog

Juney's only planning to postpone the visit by three weeks or so. The baby is already four months old and it's not her fault she's having to visit them instead of the other way round.

Having gone through a lengthy re-homing process I think it's a sensible idea to go at the end of November. The baby won't have changed all that much by then and the dog will hopefully be settled.

You're not choosing a dog over your grandson, Juney, you're just trying to find a middle way.

Good luck with the dog.

I would postpone the visit to see baby and settle the dog in. I'm sure that your son will understand. Enjoy your new dog, then go with a happy heart and give the new grandson lots of cuddles.

Juney, I would go for the dog everytime. Postpone your visit, I am sure everyone will understand.
Good luck with your new companion

The dog! simply because the baby won't know who you are, and you could visit next month. Whereas the dog needs the home now.Surely your relatives will understand.

Dog for me for the reasons mentioned- you may not get another chance.

dog

Definitely dog, if you've been on the list to take one and you dob out (for whatever reason) it will count against you in the future.

Grandchild won't even have you marked as absent! Will son and oh understand, or will it result in major "humph!" type behaviour?

I think this is a very difficult one, how will your DIL feel about a dog being more important than her baby. It could affect your relationship for the future. Is there a cultural difference, my daughter found in Spain that strangers would stop her in the street to admire a baby in a way that would not happen in England.

Our animals are very important to us with grandchildren living overseas, but if I am asked to visit, I go and do not mention the problems it leaves me sorting out the animals.

If the charity can not delay a week for you to take the dog on it seems very strange, last rescue dog we had the rescue kindly held for 2 weeks so we could attend our sons wedding abroad.

The dog is NOT more important than the baby. How melodramatic to even suggest it.

The young family was going to travel to England but there were problems with sorting the baby's passport. Most families are able to work around travel complications like this and the baby won't disappear in a puff of smoke because of a three week delay in granny's visit.

I agree with Hilltopgran - was just about to post the same! Of course to your son and DIL the baby is the most important thing in the world and I think they might find it hard to understand you putting a dog before it.

It's only a few weeks difference - provided it is convenient for your son and daughter in law for you to visit them in November instead. However, as has been mentioned, you'd better be sure that your daughter in law will be OK about it.

If there is no flexibility regarding the re-homing date (I don't really understand why it can't be put off for a couple of weeks) and you are absolutely sure that delaying your visit will not cause a rift, I would go for the dog. Perhaps you could say that as you were expecting them to visit you, it had not been expected that the re-homing date would be an issue.

Juney64 Go and see the baby! There are always a lot of dogs needing rehoming.
DaphneBs Lovely Grace is a retired greyhound. The greyhound rescue is always looking for homes.

It's far easier to get a rescue dog than a baby.

Talk to the guide dogs people first. I am sure there will be another opportunity to rehome a dog.

I wonder if you have already spoken with your family about your plans to re-home a dog. If so it could be relatively easy to explain the situation and ask for their help in resolving the conflict, especially if they know how important the dog will be to you. The suggested date could simply be to minimise your disappointment that they cannot visit you just now. Having said that I do think it is very likely the re-homing process could be delayed if you explain the circumstances. You've nothing to lose by trying and the problem could be solved. It's very important your family understand you aren't choosing the dog above their child but simply trying to find a solution to an unexpected problem. If the dates they have suggested for your visit are the only ones possible for them then in your shoes I would go. There will be other opportunities to re-home a dog. I can understand it's difficult and hope there can be a solution that is fair to you all.

Humans over animals every time! Most important to keep the family relationships healthy and that they don't get the wrong message about a dog being more important than this precious baby so don't spoil things with the family.
It would be amazing if a suitable donation to cover the dog's expenses for another few weeks would not sort the charity out and the dog will never know.

Yes I love dogs and have three but in this instance I think the baby must take priority. It's not so much about the baby but the message you are sending to your family that the dog comes first.
As others have said, talk to the charity about the problem and I'm sure they will help, if not there will be other dogs. Don't damage family relationships over this.

I am not a dog person , but in this case would delay my visit to get the dog settled in . I understand your worries over how to say it to the babies parents ! Could you speak to the homing centre first to see if they would delay it for a couple of weeks .
What problems are the parents having with getting a passport for the baby? Have they explained ?
The relationship with your son would have to be quite fragile for them to fall out with you over this small delay .