To expect ward staff to be treated politely?

Of course kitty.
I'm sure (I know) teachers and call centre staff bear the brunt of much rudeness as well.
I guess the other side of the coin is that people (customers and relatives) are not always at their best when stressed, worried, scared even, and in a very alien environment where they don't understand 'the rules'.
I have a pretty good understanding of the medical world but still find being a relative in hospital very challenging, however brilliant the staff. And however brilliant the staff are, they are on their own turf. (not excusing them, just speculating)

On the subject of the OP, no matter how professional the staff are, they are more likely to be 'nicer' to people who are polite to them so, surely, it is much better not to be rude.

Massive (((hugs))) Elegran and Barrow

Elegran and Barrow I don't have the words either but I'm sending (((Hugs)))

It is heartbreaking to hear these stories as I know so many wonderful nurses and equally people who went into nursing through lack of choice for careers in the 50s/60s. But I do rememeber A&E in one hospital in South Liverpool where the door was like a stable door and hammering on it produced a policeman with an alsatian -an early form of triage-very successful too

I am putting it behind me. At first I was angry, then guilty at allowing it to happen - in a way he was my patient, as I was the one who was there 24/7, the carers and visiting GPs and nurses, wonderful as they were, were only briefly there each day. But I have come to realise that I was tired and in need of support that day, so I can't hold myself to blame.

Thank goodness for the family. They came up trumps - and are still doing so.

Barrow and Elegran . I do remember you speaking of this during the days following your husband's death, Elegran. I can never understand how anyone who is in the 'caring' profession can treat a person with such a lack of gentleness.......
You needed to be treated with gentleness as well as your dear husband, and those women failed to do that.

Elegran and Barrow that is very sad for you all..

Elegran and Barrow It has long been my belief that everyone dies alone, no matter how many people are present in the room. What is far more important is that you were there for those you loved when they were alive and needed you.

Elegran and Barrow like Soop I find I can't find the right words, but Nanadog's quotation is so beautiful (((hugs))) and to you both

Elegran and Barrow you did everything you could for your loved ones. They knew that you loved them and you were there when they needed you. Be kind to yourselves

They are very beautiful words Nanadog

Elegran and Barrow. Don't feel guilty. You could not foresee the future and none of what happened is your fault.

Nanadog Such beautiful words.

Elegran and Barrow

William Shakespeare
"Give sorrow words. The grief that does not speak whispers the o'er-fraught heart, and bids it break."

This is where Gransnet is so wonderful. I have spoken of that evening to only a few people.

There is a bit, I think in Wordsworth, about "thoughts that do lie too deep for tears"

barrow If only we could rerun a few things and change them!

Elegran and Barrow for you both. I can't express how sorry I feel.

Elegran So sorry, but I cannot put my thoughts into words.

Elegran - sympathies and I do know how you feel. I got my DH back home as early as I could and the District Nurse would come in every day to change his syringe (he was on morphine) and the different nurses were wonderful, caring and treated him with respect and gentleness.

After a week they suggested they get a night sitter so I could actually go to bed and get some rest (I had been sleeping on a sofa next to his bed). The first night the sitter came, she was, again friendly and kind. I went to bed and after a couple of hours she came into the bedroom and said he was asking for me. I went downstairs and he had tried to get out of bed and had slipped onto the floor, I put my arms round him and told him we were going to try to get him back into bed. He mumbled something and then he was gone.

I now feel very guilty that I had not stayed with him that last night.

The image of the nurse is taking a beating in this thread as is the image of the parent of the patient. However, when I've had a couple of visits to the orthopaedic ward of a hospital since made notorious by the murderous administering of insulin through a drip, I had nothing but kindness and friendship from the nurses and the HCAs, especially when I was 'reacting' to the anaesthetic and morphine. The raucous behaviour of some of the visitors, however, was over the top, but handled tactfully by the staff.

I should have complained, but just did not feel strong enough.

Thank you. That evening will stay with me for ever. If they had appeared in the middle of the night as expected, we would have turned him ourselves and he would not have been disturbed, or they would have been too late to do anything. I shall always think I should have stayed, however disapproving they were. Maybe they would have shown more consideration. Maybe not, who knows.

Oh elegran - that is appalling - what a dreadful thing to happen. There are always rotten eggs in any profession, but it is very shocking in one whose raison d'etre is caring.

I experienced a rough and thoroughly unpleasant nurse when I was in hospital after an op - she caused me a lot of;pain, and when I squealed she said:"What's the matter with you, do you think you are going to fall in half?"

Luckily these sort of people are few and far between and the most nurses deserve our praise. Where they do not, we should speak up I think - the whole business of chatting to other nurses whilst caring for the patient is so unaccpetable - I hate it.

Justifiable complaints (which will happen) are one thing - uncalled-for abuse is quite another.

So sad, Elegran {{hug}}

Elegran ((hugs)) xx