I was thrilled when my daughter told me the other day that she is expecting our first grandchild. We have always been close and get on well together, and I have a good relationship with her husband, too. They live 20 minutes drive from us, and we see each other often, so I offered to help out when she comes out of hospital after the birth, as my mother did for me. I was astonished when she said there would be no need , as her mother-in-law will be doing this.
Her parents-in-law live abroad, and when she and her husband phoned them to break the good news, the in-laws said they intended coming over for the birth and would stay at their house. My daughter said she was quite happy with this, as her mother-in-law is a retired midwife, so is experienced with new babies. An aunt and uncle are also coming over, and my daughter asked if I would put them up, as they are not well off.
I smiled, and acted as if I was happy with all this too, and agreed to put up the aunt and uncle. I did not let my daughter see how hurt and disappointed I was. After all, she is the one having the baby, and has a right to decide who she wants to be there. I'm trying to be positive about this, but I can't stop thinking about it, and I'm afraid that one day I may let my feelings show. Do you think I am being selfish in feeling this way? And has anyone got any tips on coping with this graciously? I don't want to spoil this happy time by causing ill-feeling.
