I just remembered a huge bonfire party I held many years ago, must have been Ex's 35th. I ordered £50 worth of different cheeses from a supplier amongst other things. When it was delivered I could have cried, I had whole Bries - the real ones are the size of large pizzas - whole edams, whole goudas, whole stiltons, dozens of camemberts and heaven knows what else too. With all the BBQ stuff and salads and whatnot we couldn't move. I shoved a few in the freezer, some in the fridge and put out the rest along the whole of my big sideboard/dresser
The next day I got a phone call, the cheeses had been the cheese course for a banquet of several hundred! They received my order... The costs were waived. The evidence had been either eaten or frozen.
Deny all knowledge.