Harry has lived with us, his grandparents, on and off for most of his 14 soon to be 15yrs. His mum and dad divorced, acrimoniously, almost 10yrs ago. His mother has recently met her new partner and is to be married in Aug this year.His dad remarried almost 7yrs ago and has had little contact. My daughters new partner has persuauded my daughter that Harry should live with a parent, and it is to be Harry's choice, except.....he can only choose between his mum or his dad. which will mean a school change either way, his older sisters live with us, they are both over 18. I dont want to upset his mum, but feel this is unreasonable. HELP I NEED SOME FEEDBACK, thanks x
If Harry agteed to it would a trial year (say) where he stays with you in term timr snd spends some of his school holidays with his 'new" family be a practical idea? This woud provide some continuityin his education as well as his home life while not closing doors. A family row could have disastrous consequences all round and Harry's father's opinion also needs to be hear. The bottom line is of course Harry's happiness and well being and I can imagine the poor kid is feeling very confused and pulled in differenr directions.
Does this new man have any children of his own? If he has he is gravely mistaken if he thinks they can all suddenly live together like one big happy family! Or is he one of those people who have no children but are experts in raising children, we have all met people like him with their theories
I'm seriously worried about why this man wants a teenage boy living with them; imo men in a new relationship want their partners all to themselves. The only reason I can think of is that, perhaps this man is searching for some sort of happy family life that he's never had [perhaps he was an orphan?] or he's an engineering type [like my ex]who had dreams of having a son that he could strip car engines down with etc [which never happened; they both like taking engines apart but not in the same garage].Either way, it's totally unfair on the boy.