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to think that cold callers are cheating to withhold their numbers?

(33 Posts)
kittylester Sun 28-Sep-14 14:12:29

We have caller display on our phones but quite a few of the people we want to talk to choose to withhold their numbers too. Among the people who have withheld numbers are my mum's home, my mum's 80 year old friend, my brother, my ex Sil who is currently having problems, her daughter (who is one of her problems) but, so far today, I have answered 8 cold callers with 'number withheld" on the screen! angryangry

Ana Sun 28-Sep-14 14:40:26

Most of my cold calls/scam calls etc. come from 01234 numbers or No Number. I very rarely get a 'number withheld' call.

Charleygirl Sun 28-Sep-14 14:50:50

I am like kittylester I also get number withheld coming up on the screen and some of my friends withold their numbers. Also a call from Ireland for some strange reason always has number witheld s oI feel I must answer as I have an elderly aunt in a nursing home in Co. Louth.

I have been offered a lot of commercial property to buy recently, naturally totally risk free.

feetlebaum Sun 28-Sep-14 15:29:14

I treat 'Number Withheld' calls as I would an anonymous letter - I ignore them. I certainly wouldn't answer them.

Lona Sun 28-Sep-14 15:33:19

If you have an answer phone and the message is important, they will leave a message. That way, if you're at home, you can listen and pick up the phone!

kittylester Sun 28-Sep-14 15:42:36

Not all of them Lona. DN is very vulnerable at the moment, mum's friend won't and my brother just leaves rude messages! [grin[

janerowena Sun 28-Sep-14 15:51:03

I never answer them either, even though it is usually my bf. She gets annoyed with me for not picking up, she hates leaving messages but it just isn't worth the hassle. I tell her it's her fault for being paranoid and ex-directory, and actually she gets cold calls too despite being ex-directory!

Elegran Sun 28-Sep-14 16:13:53

It is easy to say just don't answer it but when we know that it may be someone we should be accessible to at the other end we lift the receiver to check. Some of the people we are most likely to want to hear from - the old and vulnerable - don't like answerphones and will just ring off. It could be something important that should be attended to right away, but without listening we would never know and could regret it for ever.

When we had three teenagers out living it up and four elderly parents, one of them in poor health, there was once an evening when one of DD1's "friends" rang while she was out and asked to speak to her. She was told that she was out, but continued to ring at five or ten minute intervals for the rest of the evening, with sounds of merriment in the background, and increasing amusement from her and her companions as we tried to get her to stop. We could not just leave the phone off the hook, we were home base for the older and the younger generations, and we had no answerphone.

By the time DD1 came home we were stressed out. Apparently this was a "friend" with whom there had been a falling-out, and she had only phonerd in the first place to abuse DD1. Failing that she went on to harrass us.

Marmight Sun 28-Sep-14 16:34:43

I never answer Withheld or International calls - or numbers I recognise as cold callers. If it's urgent or my daughter in Oz they will leave a message. I came home a couple of weeks ago to 15 'messages' 12 of which were cold callers who failed to leave a message. What does annoy me is have the phone ring when I am up a ladder/in the loo/at the bottom of the garden/up to my oxters in washing up water or whatever and rushing to answer only to find it's yet another unwanted call. I really must learn to ignore the ring!

HollyDaze Sun 28-Sep-14 16:37:38

I no longer answer the housephone at all - anyone who knows me will ring my mobile instead. I have a couple of friends who live in Ireland that prefer to ring the housephone so they will text saying something like 'ringing in 10 mins' and then I will answer it.

It's about time this cold-calling was stopped. If it was a case of numerous salespeople turning up at your door every day, I'm sure something would be done about that.

kittylester Sun 28-Sep-14 17:48:06

We have little and very spasmodic mobile coverage in our house so I rarely give out my mobile number.

DD's Health Visitor rang last week and, because it was number withheld, DD didn't answer it. She left a message asking DD to call her about an appointment letter which had gone to the old house. DD rang her back but got her answerphone which means that we have to answer all calls now whether we want to or not!

Holly you are quite right and I have on occasions told them they are trespassing but they don't get it! grin

We have had 3 more this afternoon that were all coldcallers!

janerowena Sun 28-Sep-14 18:17:55

Sorry elegran but I disagree, I tell everyone I know that I won't/don't answer the phone, and to leave a message. Once I have heard it I will call back and all they have to say is 'Jro it's Liz, call me when you get this'. What's so hard about that? After all, they do it when I'm out.

It also means I don't have to speak to MiL twice a day when she gets bored. smile It's my phone, I like my privacy but if other people choose to hide their identities I don't see why they should expect me to answer and get a cold-caller. I'm convinced my blood pressure has dropped a whole load simply because I am capable of ignoring the phone.

harrigran Sun 28-Sep-14 18:44:40

I never answer the phone either. The scammers never leave a message on the answer machine. Family speak and I get back to them or they text and say they are going to ring. I agree that if these cold callers were ringing your doorbell something would be done about it, nowadays they wont risk a backlash from angry residents.

Ana Sun 28-Sep-14 18:49:09

I've found that those automated calls leave a message, such as the one listing all the banks that are paying out on missold PPI policies. Easy to just press 'delete' though!

Elegran Sun 28-Sep-14 20:32:07

These days I don't answer a withheld number, but when DH was terminally ill it was very often one of the medical team ringing on their mobile. They didn't give out the number as it was private one. If I had ignored that, I could have missed an important message. I could have let it go and then chacked whether there was anything on the answerphone, but in that case I was as well to answer the call in the first place.

I don't think that firms touting for business should be able to hide their identity so that it is impossible to complain about them.

hildajenniJ Sun 28-Sep-14 22:16:39

I don't answer witheld numbers either. I also get calls which come up in the phone window as "out of area" and "unobtainable" and I don't answer those. None of them ever leave a message. DH answers an occasional one but they only try to sell him things or offer new boilers and solar panels to which we are not entitled.

durhamjen Sun 28-Sep-14 23:03:35

My grandson picked the phone up on Friday night before I could stop him to hear someone asking to speak to his grandad. He said, "He's dead now. How did you not know?"
When I took the phone off him there was nobody there.
My grandson thinks everybody knows everything.

janerowena Sun 28-Sep-14 23:43:40

Oh dear. that must be tough.

We had a number withheld call at 8.30 tonight - no message. It's just rude.

HollyDaze Mon 29-Sep-14 09:17:41

Isn't it dreadful that so many of us can't face answering our own phones sad

Elegran Mon 29-Sep-14 09:38:35

It's not that I can't face it, it's that I can't be bothered with so many interruptions to what I am doing. The doorbell ringing every quarter-hour would be just as annoying. And I don't want to ignore it, I want people to stop demanding my attention by using it.

I have a "No uninvited tradesmen" notice on the front door, which keeps out the tarmackers who are working in my area and just happen to have made twice as much as they need, and the blokes hefting bags of teatowels that are twice as much as I need.

I have the Telephone Preference System, that should stop unwanted telephone calls, but by calling from "out of area" or "private caller" they still get through. That is what annoys me.

kittylester Mon 29-Sep-14 11:07:04

Apart from the interruption, octet a slight feeling of stress in case it's mum's home or gp and there is a problem. Added to which, I'm usually cooking too!!

janerowena Mon 29-Sep-14 12:28:16

They usually aim for that time though, don't they. Mealtimes when you might be expected to be in. Or back from taking kids to school. Soon after 9am, around 12- 1pm and between 4pm and 6.30pm seem to be commonest here. I've just had two, one international and the other 01375642837, so TPS had no effect on that caller. I looked it up and they are computer scammers.

elena Tue 30-Sep-14 14:17:58

10 days ago, we got a new set of phones, and we have not had one cold call since....amazing, since despite being registered with the telephone preference thingy we could easily get 4-5 a day, and as dh and I both work from home, it got annoying. My poor old mum is plagued by them.

The phones have Call Guardian installed, and I think it's only these particular phones (from BT) which have it. You have to set it up, and it only lets in people willing to give their name, at which point you can 'approve' them and their call goes through unimpeded.

It's easy to operate (though I think it might be too complex for my mother, and unfortunately the phones are not Big Button, which she needs) and I feel liberated from this whole nuisance!

janerowena Tue 30-Sep-14 17:16:42

What happens if, for example, you get a call from DX trying to deliver a parcel and they can't find your house? And you were expecting a delivery from Argos, not a driver from DX? Would it go to voicemail?

I may seem a bit sceptical here, but I am wondering if the reason you haven't had many calls just yet is because you haven't had to pass that number out to any delivery people, shops, double-glazing companies etc..

elena Tue 30-Sep-14 21:18:31

This is how it works: if a call comes from a delivery person, the phone dies not ring in my house, but the caller hears 'please say your name' and they say their name. The phone then rings and I pick up and I hear 'John from deliveries' is on the line. I press 1 to accept the call and 2 to always allow that number.

The phone notes calls in the call registry and we can see we have had about six calls which have not come through. These are listed as unknown. These are cold calls.

Cold callers won't leave their name.