Talking to people in shops

Just a thought. If you never speak to a stranger how can you make friends ? At least two of my closest friends are people that I struck up a conversation with in random places. The funniest one was when we happened to be standing next to each other at a meeting when tea and biscuits were handed round. We both reached for and picked up the last chocolate one. We broke it in half with a smile and have shared many happy times ever since.

Eloethan I agree with all you say. When I thought about it afterwards I could see it from the mums point of view but still wondered how she thought that somebody who was standing a foot away from her could be classed as a stranger. Anyway I am going off topic now. I will continue to speak to people in supermarkets but avoid toddlers and elderly gentlemen abandoned by their wives! Probably safer that way.

I embarrass my OH whenever we are out as I talk to all and sundry. I chat to people in shops, on the bus or train. Most recently I had a lovely conversation with an elderly gentleman who sat beside me on a rather overcrowded bus while I was on my way to visit my Dad.
My OH says that I am a people person!

I'm hoping to find some interesting lovely people today on our travels to the PDSA to chat to. I did find two men to talk to on Saturday as we all watched two perfectly insane people strutting around our town centre dressed as robins.

I love falling into conversation with people on the bus. I also love eavesdropping! Very naughty but unavoidable sometimes. I have to try hard not to put my tuppenyworth in!

I love the idea of your grandson telling everyone he is going to have a nice day durhamjen I might try it out with some of the "misery guts" shop assistants. You know the ones who can't be bothered to even look up never mind engage in conversation. Perhaps a "I am going to have a nice day, thank you" might be the way forward.

I always chat with people waiting in queues etc,just general chit-chat some of the people don't see or speak to anyone for days at a time such as my neighbour who until I knocked yesterday with a Sunday paper had not spoken to anyone since last Tuesday.

How interesting anno. As a chatterer, I wonder if your sister and I have actually had one of those Dundee-based conversations!

Dd1 lives in an area with several sheltered housing complexes close by so when out with the GCs we often meet and chat to elderly folks who seem to enjoy the conversations.

The children do understand about not talking to strangers but when they're with me and joining an ongoing chat I feel it's a bit different.

GD is blessed with a mass of blonde curls which very often elicit admiring comments and she loves being complimented! (Shouldn't encourage her princess complex but it's a harmless way of cheering someone up.)

I have an 'aura' according to my husband; an invisible cloak that invites people to talk to me and I can very easily chat to a stranger.
I live in a small town and so I see the same people serving in the shops each time. Little by little we exchange pleasantries until there comes a time when there is a relationship of sorts and if we see each other under different circumstances we chat like old friends. In my local Spar I am known by name and the shop assistants have a very good idea of my lifestyle and home situation, several of them have now been to my home for meals or at least a cup of tea. There's quite a high staff turnover and interestingly the current staff are mostly young men, a few of whom know me from when I worked at the local school and they sometimes hold me up by chatting. They comment and ask questions on who's living in my house, my grandchildren, my husband, how many people I have coming to dinner etc.
What is really interesting is that my husband has now been drawn into this and he quite enjoys having a chat when he goes there.

Well, I am definitely not a chatter.
As in just now, I have been on the phone to EE about my phone's inability to access the 3G or 4G network.

Girl (after numerous security questions): Well now Jane (she had an Irish accent) and are you having a nice day?

Me(trying to sound as glacial as possible): It's been alright up till now, thank you.

Girl: And are you ready for Christmas?

Me: No. And I really just want to get my phone sorted.

She then said she would call me on my landline.
And hasn't.

Bah humbug

I am a chatterer but like youjaneainsworth I dislike it when a total stranger tries to be pally pally on the phone. Yesterday I phoned a company to cancel a direct debit after changing my mind within the 14 day cooling off period. The bloke on the other end was asking so many intrusive questions I ended up putting the phone down on him. He was insisting I had to give him a reason why, and when I told him he became really quite belligerent.... The fact he kept calling me by my Christian name and 'dear' didn't help his cause!

Pompa that made me laugh so much.

It all depends on the sort of day I have planned. If it is a busy day and I have plans and appointments I don't have time to chat and I want to be in and out of shops as quickly as I can -so thank goodness for self service checkouts. Other days when it's quiet and I have time to spare I will stop and chat to people. I wonder why we think it has to be one or the other?

Exactly, trisher, it certainly doesn't have to be.

As for making friends, ginny has answered her own question by her example of making conversation with someone she met at a meeting, which is not the same as chatting to someone you're never likely to see again.

Not exactly chatting but I was carrying a cd shelf back to the car from a charity shop [I'm always looking for cd storage] and a lady insisted on helping me carry it. It wasn't all that heavy but it was a bit bulky and she said it was daft me struggling with it when she was walking that way anyway. I thought that was really kind . Or maybe I was looking particularly old today ?

As I said on another thread I stopped to help a lady in her 80s who was holding on to some railings, either because she had something in her shoe or she didn't feel well. She assured me she was fine and then I recognised her voice, she was the actress who plays Jill Archer in the famous Radio soap. We had a brief chat and wished each other a Happy Christmas.

So I am pleased to say it proves I do speak to strangers sometimes. Oh and I helped someone over the road who looked a bit wobbly.

Definitely a chatter but having worked in customer services and retail understand not to hold up queues and to be guided by the responses from other people. Some small shops are staffed by only one person, I've been that member of staff and was usually relieved when someone came in and chatted for a while. I always strike up conversations wherever I am. Yes, my children and other half sometimes find me embarrassing. My grandchildren ask if I know the person I have just been speaking to and warn me of 'stranger danger'. I've never thought as chatting as an affliction of the lonely - what a horrible thought. Tend to think that every friend was a stranger once and where would we be without having made that initial contact.

Ana, the meeting was in a town that neither of us had been to before and not likely to return to. We live a good hours drive apart. You never know when just a quick chat and a smile will enhance you life.
Yesterday, I had a pleasant chat with the cashier as I packed my shopping, ( we did not hold any one up ). A conversation with the gentleman sitting on the bench. Whilst I was waiting for my daughter. He was very excited to tell me that he and his wife were just off to see their new grandson. A third conversation was in the 'ladies' about the ineffectiveness of the air drivers and the logistics of parking. A very friendly and much nicer than rushing around in your own little world as far as I am concerned.

ginny That's exactly what I meant - a smile and a chat can go a long way to enhance your life.

I nearly always chat, especially in indie shops. I like to see how business is going and wish them well.
In one chain store ( not busy) the assistant said she couldn't serve me as the till was broken (the card machine was fine!). I taught her how to to round up, multiply by no. Of items and then subtract the pennies, write up the transaction so she could key it into the till when that was mended, or submit a paper version. She was amazed and asked why no one had taught her that in school!

Perhaps when I've retired I'll have more time to spare for chatting with people in shops!

It doesn't take a moment Ana.

I don't rush around in my own little world, ginny, I'll pass the time of day with anyone! I just don't go out of my way to strike up conversations for the sake of it, and I refuse to be made to feel odd or anti-social simply because the majority of posters on this thread are of an ultra-chatty disposition.

Live and let live, for goodness sake.

I'll chat to anyone if I'm in the mood, but keep out of my way if I'm feeling grumpy!

Ana and Lona I agree with you both. Chatting is all very well, but doing it doesn't make you somehow "better". And actually sometimes, when I'm rushing off, to meet my grandson from school, or my grandaughter from nursery, waiting to be served whilst someone tells the till operator their life story is really annoying. I understand why young people get cross with us 'oldies'. There's a time and a place for everything and sometimes it is best to be quiet.