dirty old men

Perhaps he has been on holiday?
Mountains and molehills spring to mind ethelt, surely something you could deal with very easily.

Well done ethelbags1.
He may choose not to come back, as he may not trust himself.

You were in no way vindictive. Please dont act as though you have done anything wrong. You haven't.
That is sometimes how people who do those sorts of things want you to feel.

update on dirty old man: I have been to the class now for 2 weeks and he hasn't attended. I told the guy who runs it and also the secretary and they both promised to speak to him therefore he has obviously got the message.
Now I feel sorry for the bloke and as hes almost 90, I told his friend that he should come back to the class as long as he leaves me alone.

Im hoping to go back to work next week and may not be able to fit the class in but if I do go back and he is there I will just be polite. I don't want people thinking Im vindictive.

ethelbags if this art class is run by a reputable organisation then ask the 'leader' for a copy of their sexual harassment policy. If it's just run by a local 'artist' who is doing it to boost his income then, his comment to you suggests he's not a fit person to lead, so leave and find another class.

Though before you do that you might try standing up to this pest - you'll have nothing to lose if you plan to leave anyway, and if the reaction of the class is hostile you'll know exactly where you stand.

They might just surprise you though.

etheltbags1 you are presenting yourself confusingly as someone who is quite able to stand up for themself and also as someone who intends to run away from this nasty man.
You have had lots of supportive posts and advice so now it's up to you what you do about it.

My point was that etheltbags said there was no leader in her OP.

If there is/was then obviously that would have been the person to bring the subject up with after the first incident.

Well, I went to a self-organised group with no particular leader; however, someone had to be in charge of opening up the hall, and another was a professional artist who was more than happy to help everyone, so I may have said they were 'leaders'.

However, I think if anyone had behaved like that, someone would have been on their case pretty quickly even though everyone was 'elderly' (well, retired anyway).

absent, I admit it - something similar crossed my mind.
Age is no excuse. Surely the leader sees/hears his friend invading your space and pestering you, or doesn't he want to maybe?
Must do a bit of my needlework picture now. Craft club tomorrow and a kind member lent me her frame at least a year ago...

Sorry, ethel, but what are you on about? My advice (rubbish, apparently) was reiterated by nearly everyone on this thread.

You did say in your OP that it was a self-organised group with no leader - now apparently there is someone 'in charge' and also he is 'a leader'.

Hey flutter yes I can deal with him, in a normal setting I would have stood on his foot/poked him with my pencil/told him to ....off etc etc but this is a sedate group of older people and I feel that they are on his side due to his age.

As for ana, well, I don't let little things like that bother me, just a bit of fun lol

etheltbags1 It would be a pity if you gave up doing something you enjoy because of this pest. Why not wait and see what happens? The person in charge might have been a bit embarrassed hearing about his friend's nasty behaviour, but that doesn't necessarily mean he will ignore it. Perhaps he'll have a quiet word.

Equally, maybe the pest's absence is karma and he has fallen down the stairs.

I went to the class last week and he was not there, I spoke to the guy in charge who is also his friend and the guy said 'well he is almost 90'. I replied that, 'that is no excuse for bad behaviour'.

I am thinking that I might stop going as they are all his friends and although no one has been unfriendly towards me I think that they might take the leaders side and agree that as he is nearly 90....blah blah.

Be aware that men like that if challenged will verbally fight back by saying things such as 'can't you take a joke' or belittling you in some way, so be ready to tell him how pathetic he is.

Sorry - I see I've more or less repeated what Alidoll suggested earlier! Well - it's after 7.30 and I should be in bed with my cocoa and my shawl. No, cocoa and shawl are not euphemisms!

Whatever happens - good luck. I hope you annihilate him.

Make sure that you tell him what you think of his behaviour in a very loud voice in front of the rest of the class. If he isn't shamed into stopping then tell him you are going to report him to the police for harassment. You don't have to - just frighten him!

Spf

I dont think it was me who said not to squirt him with paint. Personally I have my own problems with a perv who tried to take advantage of me when I was very ill. Funny that - Ethel was just after an operation. So not only is this guy a perv he picks on people he sees are weak. Like my situation. If Ethel gets the chance out of anyones sight stand on his feet, swing her walking stick, (dont use one? find one!) If this guy wont take a telling, if the police dont stop him the situation in fair game for any action.
Squirting paint would leave a noticeable mark. It is not wise to leave marks! LOL.
SPF

Grabba, Sugarpuffairy, sillyoldbird and Annamika all very sensible suggestions
spf you didn't think that my suggestion of squirting acrylic paint over his crotch was very sensible then?

Oh well, probably not, but it would be great fun.

Ethelbags1 I always took wolf whistles as a bit of fun and often waved back. Never felt they were disrespectful. Wouldn't mind getting a few now instead of being called dearie lol.

I think it would be good to get to your feet and say loudly and clearly that you find his harassing behaviour unacceptable and if it continues you will go to the police.
Elrel's idea of having a word with a policewoman is a good one as he may be making a nuisance of himself elsewhere or even with children.

Oops 'convenor', not 'conveyor' in my post above, wish I could edit!
I can see why the group appealed to you. It ought to be calm and friendly and a chance to spend a few hours at absorbing activities in good company. The man's behaviour, whatever the reason, is ruining it for you.
I don't know what police/community relations are like in your home area but an informal word with a (female?) police officer could perhaps help you better assess your uncomfortable situation and possible ways of dealing with it. I hope you're on your way to a full recovery to good health .

I would be tempted to say loudly "Harry that sort of comment/ behaviour is considered sexual harassment these days "

Sorry Ethel don't think my earlier suggestion was very helpful, it was just my first reaction to his awful behaviour.

I think there are a lot of helpful suggestions here.

Best of luck.

I was once told that people take one of 3 rôles in any interaction. They are Parent, Child or Adult.
This man is being Child, pushing to see what he can get away with. He sees you as Child, not sure what to do, or Parent, indulging him.
You need to be Adult, taking control of the situation and making sure he gets the message to stop his offensive behaviour.

I would feel inclined to tell him to 'F* off and find someone his own age to molest' - easier said than done.

You could ask other class members for their support and protection.