Gransnet forums


Are we over emotional ?

(161 Posts)
NanKate Mon 11-Jan-16 15:25:35

I woke up this morning to the sad news of the death of David Bowie.

Every time I have switched on the radio or BBC News24 that is the main topic of conversation The 1.00 o'clock news was predominantly about his life.

Don't get me wrong this news needs to be covered, but I just feel it rather too much. Hope I am not becoming an old cynic.

What do others think ?

Imperfect27 Fri 05-Feb-16 10:22:40

Thanks Smileless2012.

Elegran, that is reassuring to know.

Elegran Thu 04-Feb-16 15:58:36

I hope no-one thinks that Imagran's posts are typical of Gransnet posters - I have seen FIVE deleted comments by this poster today on various threads. I have noticed previous comments by him/her.

Smileless2012 Thu 04-Feb-16 15:27:20

A good post Imperfectflowers. I pm a lady who no longer posts on the open forum for the reasons you have stated. I've been on GN for more than 3 years now, and the thread I regularly use was actually moved from here to 'Relationships' for the very reasons you've stated.

It should be possible to say if you feel a post or poster is 'being unreasonable' without causing offence.

Imperfect27 Thu 04-Feb-16 07:36:20

I have reflected on my last post overnight. I don't mean to sound high-handed. I simply cannot understand why anyone would post something so heartless and unkind when it is very evident that this is a sensitive topic. Perhaps some posts were simply meant to be frivolous, but if that is the case they were way off the mark.

This is not an isolated occurrence on GN - people are being upset daily. As someone who has only belonged for a month, I have been genuinely surprised and dismayed at the unkindness on several posts and this perception has been endorsed by receiving emails from several people who have been put off posting for good because of what seem to be pointedly negative comments.

Sometimes the problem may be that when a thread becomes very long it is tempting to skip and just add our own view, but I think it is a good idea to at least skim read and take time to consider views that may differ from your own and also to keep in mind that this is indeed a public forum.

Perhaps the litmus tests are
* would you actually say the same to someone's face?
* would you feel embarrassed if others actually knew who you were?

I am going to re-post this as a new thread today as it might get a bit lost here.

Imperfect27 Wed 03-Feb-16 19:04:03

Ziggy I agree. This type of crass post is a sad embarrassment to GN and just shows up poster.

Ziggy62 Wed 03-Feb-16 18:50:57

Cant believe mature people would make the sort of comments posted on here today. How very rude and ignorant. Sad that grown adults resort to nasty childish insults. We are entitled to an opinion but surely it can be voiced in a more adult fashion

imagran Wed 03-Feb-16 11:23:21

Message deleted by Gransnet for breaking our forum guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

JJ50 Wed 03-Feb-16 11:14:56

I find it very heard to understand how anyone can get emotional about the death of a celeb one has never met. Especially one who made the ghastly Bowie did!

SloeGinny Tue 02-Feb-16 15:59:12

I think Imperfect has summed it up......perfectly!

Nana3 Tue 02-Feb-16 07:21:04

We can get carried along with the emotion with all the media coverage. But like others I think, that's enough now. I feel sympathy for family and friends but fans have a different sort of sadness.
I never listened to Terry Wogan, I'm not grieving.
I sometimes put radio 2 on in the car but only for the music. I'm usually returning quickly to radio 4 or a CD. Same for Cilla and Bowie, I didn't seek them out. I'm sad for their nearest and dearest but not grieving myself.

Ziggy62 Mon 01-Feb-16 09:42:38

I think, personally, when a person we may never have met BUT was a massive part of our life dies, we are grieving for that time as well as feeling sad that person will no longer be in our life. Bowie was a massive part of my life as a teenager and when I listen to his music it takes me right back to those days. The same way as I now remember all the laughter driving to work each morning listening to Wogan on the radio and remembering how he made even the bleakest day happier.

People may call it being over emotional but who has the right to judge how others deal with grief.

As I said originally no one is forced to watch coverage on TV, listen to radio or buy papers/magazines

Imperfect27 Mon 01-Feb-16 06:30:24

Genuinely sad to hear of the death of Terry Wogan. As my parents listened to radio 2 as I was growing up, it felt as if he was a part of the household - and then he morphed into a TV and broadcasting legend. I will remember him fondly as someone who exuded a rare sense of charm and gentle wit. I also respect the work he did for children in Need. Yes, great respect. However, I am not devastated, distraught, shocked, grief-stricken etc. For me those emotions belong with grieving people I actually know.

Perhaps the heart of this thread chimes with comments made elsewhere about people not actually knowing how to grieve.

I cannot make a judgement about how anyone else feels / felt in relation to Bowie or Wogan or any other person who has had a great deal of influence through the media. At the end of the day, it is personal, but as someone who has lost close family members, it just feels odd to hear such strong emotion being expressed about people who, for most of us, are not significantly connected.

One last thought - sometimes a more removed loss triggers other losses we have not dealt with. Sometimes we can be surprised by the emotion that is unlocked.

morethan2 Sun 31-Jan-16 18:56:09

I don't think we're too emotional, but I do think because we now have 24/7 news they have to fill it with somthing and anything will do, be it the death of a celebrity, a football match, an election. The media go on and on and on. It stirs up emotion to fever pitch.

Nelliemoser Sun 31-Jan-16 12:36:16

I don't think we are being over emotional, both our most recent departees Bowie and Terry Wogan were both great talents and will be missed.

Jane10 Sun 31-Jan-16 11:57:10

I bet there'll be loads of coverage but the Beeb will have masses of film of him as he was one of their own. I'm sad and very sorry he's gone but I won't be piling up plastic wrapped flowers on some sort of shrine to him. Maybe there'll be a service of remembrance at the 'Tan and touch up emporium' or the 'Swimerama'? Its what he would have wanted! Maybe Chuffer Dandridge will contribute a white fiver to the collection?

Ziggy62 Sun 31-Jan-16 11:46:31

i will be interested to see how much tv/radio coverage there will be today following the sad death of the talented, funny Terry Wogan. Wonder if fans will think it is 'too much' or we are being over emotional

M0nica Thu 14-Jan-16 08:13:10

No-one denies that David Bowie was a great and innovative musician and that his sudden death has come as a shock to his many followers. It is not that his death should be reported extensively but it has been the blanket coverage of his death that has been so ridiculous. Although the brouhaha has died down a bit now, for two days there was nowhere you could go to get away from it, every form of media was wall to wall David Bowie.

At least half the population had no interest in him and his music. I know no-one who was a fan of his or listened to his music, even though most had heard of him and appreciated his talent.

The day or so before David Bowie died, Pierre Boulez died. A famous classical music conductor and composer and as innovative and avant garde as DB. In the world of classical music as important as DB, if not more so. His death barely got a mention in the newspapers.

Tegan Thu 14-Jan-16 00:45:49

My partner tells me that he was listening to R6 yesterday and someone phoned in to complain about the amount of coverage and the man on the radio [ I don't know who it was] said 'can I just tell you that my daughter found me crying yesterday and it was the first time in her life that she had ever seen me cry'. My daughter phoned me about it [she hardly ever phones me] and even my son, who isn't one for talking a lot, talked about him for ages on the phone. My partner was really emotional when I spoke to him about it on Monday sad.

Ziggy62 Thu 14-Jan-16 00:11:18

as you can probably tell from my name on here, I am a HUGE fan of mr jones and have been since I was 11. My daughter rang me on my way to work at 7am to tell me the sad news. I blocked it out till i got home at 6pm, then listened to an hour of his music on radio 2. Watched some of the news and listened to his fans talking of their memories. I have all his albums and was lucky enough to see him in concert many times.

I was quite surprised about how much coverage there was on TV and radio but no one is forced to watch or listen. Nowadays there are so many channels!

In my opinion he was a very talented musician and for me personally his music helped me cope with the death of my husband then my father (both died from cancer)

It seems from all the coverage I'm not the only fan lol. Maybe, now that awful programs like X factor have taken over in the music industry, people are mourning the way music has died as well as the death of a very talented man who battled addiction to drugs and drink and through his music brought pleasure to many (me included)

harrysgran Tue 12-Jan-16 21:55:29

I thought I was being a bit heartless so glad others feel the same yes he was a good entertainer but the media goes over the top nowadays they did the same with cilla until you got fed up of hearing about it.

Jalima Tue 12-Jan-16 21:11:41

ps Elvis didn't write his own material

Jalima Tue 12-Jan-16 21:10:20

Elton John

WilmaKnickersfit Tue 12-Jan-16 21:08:30

In reply to NanKate

Greatest popular entertainer/artist of C20

For me it would be,

Elvis Presley
Michael Jackson
Freddie Mercury

Can't think of anyone else of their calibre for me, not even the Beatles.

tigger Tue 12-Jan-16 20:44:56

jinglebellfrocks - absolutely

tigger Tue 12-Jan-16 20:43:53

Anniebach - they have a huge influence