Patronising or what?

No. It feels horrible to be treated in a patronising manner. In the end you give up and just let it happen. And that's not good.

When the waiter directs every enquiry or comment to one of your adult children, and then looks faintly surprised when you are the one producing the plastic when the bill come round. And when they ask, "Is this your card?" "No, it's my daughter's and she's letting me play at being the Mummy".

Grrr!

I hope you give them that kind of retort, jings. It might mean they don't patronise the next old lady because you made them think about what they're saying and the impression they're giving.

If there was a 'like' button on your post I'd use it ChristineFrance

Oh please there is so much happening in the world I really can't get worked up about a patronising comment. PC is overtaking common sense

It's nothing to do with either Political Correctness and there's certainly no 'common sense' being involved.

I don't wish to be metaphorically patted on the head just because I may be entitled to a bus pass. I still have all my faculties and I can manage to tie my own shoelaces unaided.

I am as sick to the back teeth of ageism as much as I am to all the other -isms out there.

Ah bless you all...still able to get worked up at your age

It's nothing to do with PC-ness. It's a twee expression which shouldn't be used to or about anyone, IMO! 'Bless you' is different entirely.

'Atishoo!

IMHO, I cannot get worked up regarding being addressed politely (regardless of the words used)...

The young man who did the paving in my garden came in for his cheque and was no sooner through the front door than he said admiringly "You keep the place spotless " No I don't! I do the minimum to keep it fit to live in. He hadn't even looked around - just said what I assume he thought all old ladies would love to hear, that all they are good for is to keep the house clean.

(No offence meant to any old ladies who pride themselves on their spotless homes - but as the only attempt opening gambit of a conversation?)

"Oh bless!" is generally said about someone, as an aside to the grownups present, soop, not directly to the object of the remark (well, they are either cute pre-schoolers or they are gaga, and wouldn't understand it, poor old scones)

Elegran Perhaps he was shy. I would have accepted his comment with a becoming smile.

Still cannot find it in me to get ruffled...guess I'm just a soppy old dear.[ wink]

Oh, I accepted it with a smile OK. I don't think he was shy - he did some work for a young woman around the corner and when I passed he was chatting animatedly.

I wouldn't accept the sort of patronising that jings says she gets. Milder stuff I can shrug off, if I even notice it, but not actual rude stuff like not talking to the person who's buying and then asking if her credit/debit card is hers, is just rude and ageist.

Is your DD a very dominant and/or attractive person, jings? Not making excuses but I'm finding it hard to imagine you not being stroppy about being treated patronisingly

I've heard that phrase "oh bless" said about people of different ages and genders and it always sounds patronising to me.

I am same as soop.
I will take all the , aw bless, help across the street, help with anything I can get. And thank the person for it.

Blimey obie, I thought you were only in your fifties!

I will, as in when the time comes!
But I am not one to not accept help/advice./assistance from anyone.

Bags I cba any more.

These days I just chuckle inwardly. Much like I reckon you would do.

soop! It's so lovely to see you on a proper thread!

Actually Bags I might say that next time it happens.

In your snottiest voice, jings: "You do realise how patronising and ageist you're being, don't you, young man person?"

I took something back to M & S that was too small, and was told by the very young assistant that I could order the bigger size online if I had someone that could show me how. I've been buying online since before she was born. I was gobsmacked, but ended up feeling sorry for her, as she saw my face and hers turned brick red! Aw, bless, she was only trying to help