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Costs of gravestones, etc are we being ripped off?

(8 Posts)
Brigidsdaughter Wed 07-Dec-16 23:41:17

We are looking at full memorials for our son's grave. We were so impressed with a local firm we went to put a deposit down but they took lots of info and insisted the system was to send a quote first. Thankfully- we got it a few weeks ago and it stunned us. I just got another similar quote on the phone as a guide and it was similar (£4800 for dark granite headstone, kerbstones, slab, flower vase).
Like everything, they are cheaper online where you don't get to see the goods.

Only a few years back I organised similar for my mother's grave in Dublin and it was less than Euros 3000.00.

I understand the stones are all imported, mostly from India and China and most of the memorials in various brochures/website are the same as each other - too look at anyway. Costs vary though...

I do appreciate the overheads, labour costs, etc but really, it all seems like such a business and it's not going to go out of fashion, is it??

5th anniversary coming up and it can't be put off any longer, our choice to go down this route, etc but do feel a bit ripped off. Maybe I'm just turning into a grumpy old bag.Grrr...

Lisalou Thu 08-Dec-16 06:43:32

I dont think you are a grumpy old bag, and my heart goes out to you. Nobody should lose a child.
I do think that all these things are a ripoff, from the cost of a funeral, to the cost of stones, etc. I think they take advantage of people who are going through a terrible time.
Having said that, if you want to do this for your son, it really is up to you how much you spend. Also, if you like the work of the local firm, you might as well go with them, as at least you get a say in the quality of the materials used, etc, as you will be able to see the granite before it is put in place, workmanship of engraving etc.

Anya Thu 08-Dec-16 10:55:39

Firstly so, so sad to read your post and realise you've lost your son. There are no words I know, but I feel for you so much in this situation.

Secondly, that is a rip off. I've just bought a gravestone for my sister's grave. It was black granite, engraving free up to a certain number of letters and setting in place was included in the price of just over £1000.

My only extra was a fee to LA for transfer of deeds of ownership for the grave into my name.

Anya Thu 08-Dec-16 10:57:45

My son paid £2000 for a bespoke child's gravestone for his son's grave, all inclusive.

Brigidsdaughter Thu 08-Dec-16 19:14:19

Thank you for your kind comments. Our ds had a rare chromosome disorder with profound and multiple problems, made worse by epilepsy which came at age 7. He died in his sleep, aged 18, (sudden death in epilepsy) but his health and quality of life had got progressively worse since adolescence. He lived at home with us, me, dh and ds2, and was much loved. We know he is now at peace, no more suffering, and we didn't get to the point we were unable to care for him, for which we are so thankful.

While there is always an underlying sadness, we have adjusted, though very slowly at first, to living as three. It did give us more time to focus on each other - good at times, other times a bit much ;-) Ds1 always with us in spirit, but wonderful to appreciate and enjoy ds2 more as he grows. He's only 21.

Anya, So sorry to hear you lost a grandson, very sad. You must feel so protective of your son. That mother's instinct never changes it seems to me.

BlueBelle Thu 08-Dec-16 19:24:11

I m guessing it depends where you live as I bought a headstone for my mum and dad joint grave four years ago it included the plinth and vase They don't have kerbs anymore as they take up to much space but I paid under £1000 and it was beautifully engraved

BlueBelle Thu 08-Dec-16 19:24:54

Sorry pressed the button too soon I was going to say my thoughts are with you so very very sad x

Grannyben Thu 08-Dec-16 20:30:55

I am so very sorry to read about the loss of your darling son.

I was just wondering, have you obtained this quote quite recently. I only ask because I work in retail and many of the products we sell are imported and we have all been quite shocked at how much the prices have increased since brexit.