What do you think? Joke I found offensive.

jane10, jayanna, raficha, exactly.

bellsisabelle, ?

Flip me! Shall we leave off now?! Even I've forgotten about it.

Don't you think the idea of gay men flouncing about, being offended at this joke is rather stereotypical? One of the friends I met with on New Years Day said " What offends me is people who have nothing to do with me, telling me what I should be offended by."

Absolutely rafichagran!

The children have probably forgotten about the words some of you find so offensive in a pantomime. It's the adults that are drawing attention to it.

But part of bring up strong resilient children is surely teaching them that there are some people in society who need more care and protection and part of that is not accepting terms of abuse even as a joke, because even though personally you may not be offended, there may be others who will suffer.
grannypiper your nephew and his friends have grown up in a more understanding society, if you were to ask older men about the same words I suspect the answer might be different.

Because then children could laugh them off as easily as gay adult can. That's why.

Jane10 says "We should concentrate our efforts on bringing up strong resilient children who can face bullies down or more usefully just be unbulliable"

Why would we expect nasty sneery little jokes to be part of doing that?

Inappropriate in a pantomime put on by a children's theatre group.

Most people accept that words used in the past to demean certain groups and set them apart - like "nigger" "darkie" "chink", etc., are offensive and have no place in a decent society.

The words "queer" "poof" "fairy", etc., originate from a time when homosexuality was criminalised and there was a great deal of hatred and mistrust directed at gay people. These terms were meant to demean and keep gay people firmly set apart from heterosexual society. They were not used affectionately but sneeringly - and their use today perpetuates a notion of a sort of wierd and hilarious "otherness", even if it is presented as just a cheery little joke.

bellisabelle I would have felt uncomfortable too, it's not okay to make fun of anyone, it's not humour.

DD1 is a drama teacher at a Christian school and she is appalled at some of the Christian ideas against homosexuals that were being taught to these impressionable teenagers. She really has had to speak up and is starting to change this ignorance. Where people who are normally caring members of a school and are in authority can be so ignorant in this day and age is surprising. Many young people must feel very confused and many keep all their thoughts bottled up inside.

Young teens, or even younger are not always able to stand up to bullying behaviour and are never going to laugh at jokes being made about them. The best way for this type of behaviour to stop is for others to stand up and say No, this is wrong.

Ooh well lets keep those words so special and naughty that youngsters definitely wont want to use them. Oh, wait a minute, human nature doesn't work like that!!
Overreacting will only make things worse. Homosexuality is an everyday fact of life.
Bullying is something else altogether and can be about a whole host of other things. We should concentrate our efforts on bringing up strong resilient children who can face bullies down or more usefully just be unbulliable.

But surely this has nothing to do with whether or not you have a sense of humour? It's about safeguarding children and young adults from the influence of people who are happy to inflict their banal and insensitive comments on young impressionable minds.

When we cringe as we look back on Benny Hill and questionable sit-coms it's because in those days nobody cared a jot whether homosexuals were upset or offended. They were the butt of humour and that was that.

We can only say we have moved on from those days if we continue to educate the young where tolerance and understanding are concerned.

I will chastise my Nephew without delay for his lack of empathy and homophobic sense of humour

Well homophobia takes many forms Lumpy. Aren't you being homophobic by dismissing the opinions of people who are gay, as if what they think or feel is of no account?

If homophobic language doesn't make you angry then I think you need to have a good think about why that is Really? Being talked down to doesn't help, that's for sure.

Heavens! I couldn't see anything wrong with LSP'S post.

Don't spray everybody with your anti-homophobic blunderbuss, LSP.
What gives you the right to signal your massive virtue without knowing diddley squat anybody else's attitudes, family situation or indeed sexuality.

Really gets on my nerves when people wail about how pc the world is, is it because they miss all the casual racism and blatant homophobia? Were their lives enriched by having Love Thy Neighbour and Benny Hill on the telly?

It's not hard not to be homophobic, it really isn't. You can make jokes without using words that are still used across the country to bully and intimidate.

Just 'cos some of you have gay friends who aren't bothered doesn't make it right. Poof and Fairy have no place in a children's panto. If you think they do you are not laid back you just have no idea how homophobic our society still is and how these words can hurt.

If homophobic language doesn't make you angry then I think you need to have a good think about why that is.

You are totally missing the point grannypiper. Yes, adult males, especially when in a group, can laugh it off, but this is about young adolescents. The ones who will be made deeply unhappy by homophobic bullying.

THESE WORDS SHOULD NOT BE FED INTO THE MOUTHS OF CHILDREN.

That wasn't shouting. It was trying to get the point across. It's an important point.

As a previous poster put it. ...head... desk...

grannypiper!

I asked my Nephew(22 and gay) if he was offended by this joke, the answer was no, he asked the other 5 gay men he was in the pub with, the all laughed and were no in the slightest bit offended and they use the term gay with straight people who are being a bit "divaish"

I absolutely agree with you Bellsisabelle.

It doesn't matter whether the children understand it or not - and I expect some of them will - I think that sort of language is from a bygone era and is insulting and hurtful. Why is it funny anyway?

A children's theatre group panto can expect to have a lot of children in the audience. More than a normal panto I would have thought.

Left the engine running bags