Am I being silly?

Youare in poor health and sacrifice yourself to visit an ungrateful and selfish friend and then ask whether you are being selfish for not going to see her?

Many old people have lost both parents. I lost mine quite a while ago. I can tell you feel sorry for her but it's time to look after yourself for a chance.

You cannot save everybody from loneliness.

Not at all selfish, angie - more than seven months of selflessness is admirable. On the assumption that her parents were elderly, and therefore their deaths were to be expected she has every right to grieve their passing but really shouldn't be floored by their loss. Did they support her financially or emotionally to a significant extent?

Expecting financial support from her daughter is somewhat unreasonable unless there are special circumstances that lead your friend to expect this.

Your upcoming op looks like being an ideal time for you to have a breather from the demands of this particular friendship! Once you've recovered perhaps you could break the tradition of "Thursday is angie day" so that she takes a bit more responsibility for herself. Would she accept any advice from you about her finances (benefits she may be entitled to, equity release, pension drawdown, etc)? If so, you may be able to guide her towards taking sensible steps to minimise the financial hardship she says she's suffering. If not, does she have another friend or family member who could give her this sort of advice?

Wishing you well for your op on Monday - I hope it will give you better vision once you've healed. Wouldn't mind betting that your excema will improve whilst your not dancing attendance on your demanding friend!

It does sound as though your friend is taking you for granted, Angie, perhaps try not to be so available in future. Are you her only friend? She is not your responsibility, especially with regard to money, she should contact Age Concern or the CAB to find out what she's entitled to.

Hope all goes well for you.

No,you are not being selfish angie sadly it looks as if your friend is though. Did your friend lose her parents recently? If so perhaps she's still coping with their loss which must be compounded by her daughter living abroad. Is she her only child?

Good friends are hard to find and are to be treasured. She's certainly found a treasure in you and I hope one day she'll realise how lucky she is.

Good luck for Monday, hope it goes well.