In thinking many modern parents take the easy way out

Some can make, some prefer to buy. It really doesn't matter as long as it results in a child who is happy to take part in the activity or occasion.

I remember that Napisan routine, Pensionpat - then later out to the washing line in all weathers. I also used to make them a cooked breakfast (bacon etc) before school and work. But otherwise I don't think I was very maternal - get them to be as independent as possible, as early as possible was my motto.

Let’s not be too quick to criticise modern parents. My DS and his wife have three children under 12. He is a very busy teacher with senior responsibilities in a Primary school and his wife works long hour in the city. They are constantly being expected to produce costumes. The 9 year Old bipod had to go to school dressed as an evacuee last week: the 6 year Old needs an angel costume and also a mermaid’s costume for the school disco. These can all be purchased quite cheaply now so the question is: does DiL spend all weekend producing costumes or does she spend time with the children. Perhaps the blame lies with the schools. My children’s Primary school had a stock of costumes for the Christmas show. Now parents seem to be expected to provide their own every year.

That’s a good point humbertbear the schools did used to dress you for school plays etc I remember being sent to the sewing room to get my angel costume the poor mums that come in the charity shop looking for world book day costumes and history /Christmas projects etc etc at the last minutes
I know my daughter breathed a huge sigh of relief when they left primary after scrabbling around trying to find things for two kids for six years I still have some of the ww2 bits and pieces in my spare room

I think most parents, (why just blame mothers?) give their children lots of time and do all sorts of things with them in the run up to Christmas as at other times, but what gets done varies from family to family and generation to generation.

Just because nowadays parents find it easier to buy a costume for a play or fancy dress does not mean that parents do less with their children or buy their way out of parenting.

I am heading off to see DGC this weekend and, once I reach them, it will be Christmas, Christmas, Christmas all the way; making decorations, Christmas cards, special food and talking about everything they will do with us when they come and stay with us for the Christmas week.

Their house will be full of Christmas with parents deeply involved that any costumes needed, may be bought, is no reflection at all on the quality and commitment of their parents

There are indeed more demands for costumes now. Not just the Christmas performances and the local gala, but World Book Day, Red Nose Day, Hallowe'en, Super Hero Day ( both my 4yo DGS have had one of those this term), etc. Even non-uniform day often seems to involve a special outfit. There's a lot of pressure to keep up.

I worked as a Nursery Nurse in an infants school. We didn't ask parents to supply costumes, as we had our own. Headdresses were made by the children if need be,as an activity. Angels were swathed in old net curtains.We were not 'precious ' about what the children wore as it was the taking part.
Annsixty, I was shocked when one of my dils gave her child a cold bottle of milk!

No, I don't believe young parents today are more likely not to be bothered about making costumes than in previous generations. Everything changes, there are more occasions for dressing up at school and some affordable dressing up clothes in the supermarkets.
There have always been a small number of CBA parents, there always will be sadly. The vast majority of parents are as devoted now as they ever were. The pressures on parents change thats all.

I was very lucky to have a widowed mum with plenty of time and a sewing machine to hand living very locally.
My children would come home and ask "can nannie make me a X Y Z costume.

Yes times have changed and I agree its easier to buy a costume than to make it, I didn't have those skills so mine were a bit of a bodged affair. I don't think it matters as long as the child has the costume. There are so many things available now to make life easier I'm all for it.
I remember the napisan routine as well and hanging out nappies in the freezing cold, brrrr

Maggiemaybe - that's right

In fact, I think it's quite ridiculous! Although the children enjoy it. I don't remember all this from my (boring) schooldays - just work, work, work

When I was a young, modern-for-that-time mum, I didn't do all my family's washing by hand in a big old butler sink. I couldn't be arsed, so I bought a washing machine.

I didn't spend each morning raking out the grates and laying fires in all the rooms. I couldn't be arsed, so I had central heating installed.

I didn't spend every day walking to the shops to buy food for that day, going from grocer to greengrocer to butcher to dairy. I couldn't be arsed, so I got a fridge and a freezer and shopped once a week.

I'm sure my grandmothers, if they'd been alive then, would have scorned my easy, CBA life.

I was an angel when I was seven. All the other angels wore cobbled together costumes made from old pillow cases and tinsel. My mother based mine on renaissance paintings! I was mortified and spent ages stripping it down till it looked like everyone else 's!
GS2's school provides costumes but DD was a bit taken aback when he told her he had to take all his clothes off to do the play! Actually it was just to put the costume on ("And I kept my knickers on!")

I am pleased, as a young mum, you could afford to have CH and washing machine but some of us did not. I was one that had to do every bit of washing by hand, not just the terry nappies and yes I had to rake out the coal fire and relight it each morning whilst trying to keep the baby warm.
I totally agree with buying nativity outfits from a supermarket, who wants to spend hours and hours for a 30 minute play ?

I was a stay at home mother, but I couldn’t sew. Luckily the school provided most costumes, and my mother was still around to make anything needed.

My grandchildren seem to need lots of dressing up costumes at school, though costumes are provided for plays. My DIL and her various helpers seem to be good at thinking of ideas. Not a bit CBA in spite of work. I do think living in a permanent rush, as she does, is sad, though. No walking to school with the children and then coming home for a peaceful cup of coffee.

As a Gran who has hurriedly made up Viking costumes, Roman costumes etc with strict instructions that they were to be kept for subsequent DGC I was able to do it. Glad that costumes can be bought (but, oh save us from Disney) but do think about other children somewhere in the world being exploited to make these things-yes I know it provides an income. Isn't life just more complicated?
I worked with a lady married to a sheep farmer. Her son had to be a shepherd with a tea cloth-he grumbled and said "my Dad IS a shepherd and wears a rugby shirt"!
I can't remember having to supply so many costumes when our DDs were small.

I agree with Humbertbear; when I produced Nativity plays in the seventies I organised a large wardrobe of costumes which could be used and refreshed each year. I was horrified by the demands sent home in later years by mainly younger, childless teachers, for very specific costumes for an ever increasing number of dressing up events. I do think/ know that schools are capable of doing far more to costume their plays, at least.

There does seem to be a lot more 'dressing up' days.
My grandson had to wear spotty clothes a couple of weeks ago. No idea what for, but I was dreading it. Spotty shirt, maybe. Spotty trousers?!
What a waste of money.

I was, and continue to be, absolutely hopeless at sewing and so when my children were small if a costume was needed and the school wasn't providing it (I seem to recall that the school took responsibility for nativity costumes) I would have to pay someone to do it.

I don't see these sorts of parental activities as being a prerequisite for good parenting. I expect there are parents who look good on the surface but aren't so great in other areas that really matter, such as emotional support.

A major concern I do have is about some mums (and dads) spending a lot of time on their mobile phones but perhaps if I had grown up in this highly technological environment, I would have run the risk of having an over-reliance on my phone too. Goodness knows, I waste far too much time on the internet!

Aside from that concern, I do get a bit fed up with people constantly criticising the younger generation - their parenting skills, their work ethic, their financial management, etc. etc. I don't think I was a perfect parent but I did my best - and I think that is what most of today's parents try to do.

There is a choice for parents today. Parents today are pressurised by what social media deems as good parenting. The more you have bought to instagram, the better parent you must be. Wrong! I have given up material things (I still have a few) and my kids don't have every toy from the store or every gadget around but they have me and all of me. I make them crowns from coloured cardboard on their birthdays, followed by a house full of balloons. My children get so excited for this. Every. Single. Year. We make outdoor kitchens from tins and old spoons. My kids know life as I knew life. Because although I am living in the current age, I am responsible for how I use my time.

My message: DON'T BE A PARENT DEFINED BY SOCIAL MEDIA. IT'S NOT REAL. IT'S CERTAINLY NOT TRUE AND IT ADDS UNNECESSARY PRESSURE TO YOURSELVES TO DISPLAY YOUR LIVES AS PERFECTION. Stop today!

My daughter is brilliant at DIY costumes, but when she's particularly busy - she's training to be a midwife - she will buy ready-made stuff. Littlest GS was a sheep yesterday. DD told me she couldn't be bothered to cover him with cottonwool, especially as he would have spent his time picking it all off. He looked cute in his shop-bought sheep onesie.

I think if I had young children today I'd make my kids their own costume...simply because young parents today are expected to fork out cash all the time.

Kindergarten graduations (never knew there was such a thing), sponsored everything (that's not new) and a myriad of other things nursery schools and primaries seem to require parents to buy.

It must cost a ruddy fortune to have a kid at nursery or school today. I'd be cutting costs wherever I could

Good for you Dame!
I enjoyed the cobbling together of various costumes but, as someone has said, there were far fewer occasions. My DD isn’t able to, for a variety of reasons, and I’m still called upon sometimes, which I also enjoy.
The OP wasn’t, in my opinion, judging young parents she was just asking the question to open a discussion. No need to respond so aggressively Paddyann.

I was intrigued by that bottle preparation machine - couldn't really see how it helped. You still have to sterilize the bottles, put the formula in, shake it up etc.