In thinking many modern parents take the easy way out

I was a stay at home mother, but I couldn’t sew. Luckily the school provided most costumes, and my mother was still around to make anything needed.

My grandchildren seem to need lots of dressing up costumes at school, though costumes are provided for plays. My DIL and her various helpers seem to be good at thinking of ideas. Not a bit CBA in spite of work. I do think living in a permanent rush, as she does, is sad, though. No walking to school with the children and then coming home for a peaceful cup of coffee.

I am pleased, as a young mum, you could afford to have CH and washing machine but some of us did not. I was one that had to do every bit of washing by hand, not just the terry nappies and yes I had to rake out the coal fire and relight it each morning whilst trying to keep the baby warm.
I totally agree with buying nativity outfits from a supermarket, who wants to spend hours and hours for a 30 minute play ?

I was an angel when I was seven. All the other angels wore cobbled together costumes made from old pillow cases and tinsel. My mother based mine on renaissance paintings! I was mortified and spent ages stripping it down till it looked like everyone else 's!
GS2's school provides costumes but DD was a bit taken aback when he told her he had to take all his clothes off to do the play! Actually it was just to put the costume on ("And I kept my knickers on!")

When I was a young, modern-for-that-time mum, I didn't do all my family's washing by hand in a big old butler sink. I couldn't be arsed, so I bought a washing machine.

I didn't spend each morning raking out the grates and laying fires in all the rooms. I couldn't be arsed, so I had central heating installed.

I didn't spend every day walking to the shops to buy food for that day, going from grocer to greengrocer to butcher to dairy. I couldn't be arsed, so I got a fridge and a freezer and shopped once a week.

I'm sure my grandmothers, if they'd been alive then, would have scorned my easy, CBA life.

Maggiemaybe - that's right

In fact, I think it's quite ridiculous! Although the children enjoy it. I don't remember all this from my (boring) schooldays - just work, work, work

Yes times have changed and I agree its easier to buy a costume than to make it, I didn't have those skills so mine were a bit of a bodged affair. I don't think it matters as long as the child has the costume. There are so many things available now to make life easier I'm all for it.
I remember the napisan routine as well and hanging out nappies in the freezing cold, brrrr

I was very lucky to have a widowed mum with plenty of time and a sewing machine to hand living very locally.
My children would come home and ask "can nannie make me a X Y Z costume.

No, I don't believe young parents today are more likely not to be bothered about making costumes than in previous generations. Everything changes, there are more occasions for dressing up at school and some affordable dressing up clothes in the supermarkets.
There have always been a small number of CBA parents, there always will be sadly. The vast majority of parents are as devoted now as they ever were. The pressures on parents change thats all.

I worked as a Nursery Nurse in an infants school. We didn't ask parents to supply costumes, as we had our own. Headdresses were made by the children if need be,as an activity. Angels were swathed in old net curtains.We were not 'precious ' about what the children wore as it was the taking part.
Annsixty, I was shocked when one of my dils gave her child a cold bottle of milk!

There are indeed more demands for costumes now. Not just the Christmas performances and the local gala, but World Book Day, Red Nose Day, Hallowe'en, Super Hero Day ( both my 4yo DGS have had one of those this term), etc. Even non-uniform day often seems to involve a special outfit. There's a lot of pressure to keep up.

I think most parents, (why just blame mothers?) give their children lots of time and do all sorts of things with them in the run up to Christmas as at other times, but what gets done varies from family to family and generation to generation.

Just because nowadays parents find it easier to buy a costume for a play or fancy dress does not mean that parents do less with their children or buy their way out of parenting.

I am heading off to see DGC this weekend and, once I reach them, it will be Christmas, Christmas, Christmas all the way; making decorations, Christmas cards, special food and talking about everything they will do with us when they come and stay with us for the Christmas week.

Their house will be full of Christmas with parents deeply involved that any costumes needed, may be bought, is no reflection at all on the quality and commitment of their parents

That’s a good point humbertbear the schools did used to dress you for school plays etc I remember being sent to the sewing room to get my angel costume the poor mums that come in the charity shop looking for world book day costumes and history /Christmas projects etc etc at the last minutes
I know my daughter breathed a huge sigh of relief when they left primary after scrabbling around trying to find things for two kids for six years I still have some of the ww2 bits and pieces in my spare room

Let’s not be too quick to criticise modern parents. My DS and his wife have three children under 12. He is a very busy teacher with senior responsibilities in a Primary school and his wife works long hour in the city. They are constantly being expected to produce costumes. The 9 year Old bipod had to go to school dressed as an evacuee last week: the 6 year Old needs an angel costume and also a mermaid’s costume for the school disco. These can all be purchased quite cheaply now so the question is: does DiL spend all weekend producing costumes or does she spend time with the children. Perhaps the blame lies with the schools. My children’s Primary school had a stock of costumes for the Christmas show. Now parents seem to be expected to provide their own every year.

I remember that Napisan routine, Pensionpat - then later out to the washing line in all weathers. I also used to make them a cooked breakfast (bacon etc) before school and work. But otherwise I don't think I was very maternal - get them to be as independent as possible, as early as possible was my motto.

Some can make, some prefer to buy. It really doesn't matter as long as it results in a child who is happy to take part in the activity or occasion.

Woman were often ‘housewives’ in our day ...you try making fancy dress at the eleventh hour when you are working one or two jobs, travelling distances to and from work, looking after the house/children, and not living anywhere near any relatives to borrow grandmas headscarves
It’s a very different life now and I don’t blame mums from buying something quickly, the days for sitting around the family fire whilst sewing up tea towels is gone and I think it’s unfair to call Mums ‘ can’t be arsed’ when many of them are really rushed off their feet

paddyann "You dont know the circumstances so you shouldn't judge."

It wasn't a judgement - was more of a question.

Oh, and we all judge, all the time. Every single one of us so no need to take the moral high ground. It's how we form opinions. I pick things up in the shop and judge whether it's nice or tacky, or a rip off. I judge the woman who swears at her kids, I judge the litter-dropper. It might be a silent judgement but we do it. Just as we find something sweet - like a young man showing good manners, for example. Don't they say at interview etc, or on first meeting, that first impressions count for a lot? We all judge, all of the time.

It seems to be the way of the world that badly made costumes for every occasion are available for parents to buy now. I am in the 'tea-towel on head plus old stripey shirt tied with dressing gown cord' shepherd costume camp. I have noticed lots of children being kept quiet in supermarket trolleys with screens - hand held devices. And parents seem to pay for party venues instead of providing sandwiches, jelly and ice cream at home. I know I had to budget quite carefully when mine were small but many parents today must be better off than I was.

Personally, I love the homemade ones.

This was my DDs idea. Some black tights stuffed and tied to make a spider with legs.
She is clearly a chip off my old block as far as this goes.

I always enjoyed sewing and did like to be a bit creative with fancy dress for my lot. But there are so many lovely costumes available now for less than the cost of making them, it makes sense to take advantage of this and just be thankful for the time saved. Fruit gum crowns were pretty effective though!

I have managed to get quite good results with kids fancy dress competions over the years.
Most such competions are set up to get people to see what they can create without spending lots of money.

DD is now doing this for her little boys . An imagination is needed. You can do a lot with just crepe paper and a few other things that come to hand.

DGD once won a prize at a Halloween party for a witch's outfit improvised entirely from black bin bags!

I think anything which makes life easier is a good thing. Its too short to worry about how to make 2 net curtains and a coat hanger into 'A Super Hero' costume.

I think I must fall into the CBA category. I was in a supermarket yesterday which had inexpensive nativity-themed dresssing up outfits for little ones. I said to my Dh 'I wish they'd been available when our children were small!'

I am reasonably handy with a sewing machine and a needle but it was never a pleasure trying to cobble together something that would be acceptable to both school and child. Invariably, I wouldn't have some item or other and would have to track down an alternative without spending a fortune.

Buying off the peg would have been brilliant!

annsixty these bottle prep machines have been around for a little while now and I guess if you're not breastfeeding then they're an easy way to make up a feed.