AIBU to want to make a speech at my child's wedding

I gave a speech at two of my sons' weddings and that was back in 94 and then 95. And I will at my third son's wedding, if he decides to go down that line.

Yoyogran - totally unreasonable - if your son is having a 'traditional' wedding, then stick to the tradition as that's obviously what he wants - in that case it's the best man's job to speak for him, not yours. If you insist on making a speech, you will regret it later as you realise how unusual it was and how you seemed to have pushed your way in. Sorry, you may not like this but many years ago with my first husband, I had a very pushy mil who frankly got on my hubby's nerves more than she did on mine, and her desire to be the focus of the wedding resulted in us changing our plans and having a much smaller event with just a wedding breakfast, no after-wedding dance and we left for our honeymoon. Let your son do his own thing.

Sorry, don't see how my comment qualifies as troll-hunting! Genuinely baffled ...

Yet again a genuine poster has been hijacked by a website ...of course it’s prudent not to post too many details but we re a caring lot who like helping each other and it’s only possibly to offer genuine help if you know what the problem is
Usernames have absolutely no bearing on the story which would be the recognisable part by anyone knowing the person or family the name is surplus information
The only way forward is a private thread but GN won’t allow this, so no way forward

Morning Yoyo I haven't read all the post, few pages, but no mention of the father of groom, how does he feel about you giving a speech or is he not in the picture, for what ever reason?

I walked my youngest D down the isle, I gave the f.o.b speech, as her father hadn't been in her life since she was 3yrs old. He wasn't invited to the wedding and when there were rumours he was flying over from Indonesia to be there, s.i.l said he would knock him out if he appeared!
He did appear [all expenses paid trip, complements of his dad, D granddad]

When all the speeches were made, D's father came to the top table, notes in hand, and gave his speech! He did, surprisingly, complement me on job well done, bringing our 3 children up on my own! Towards the end of the reception, my D had a big fluming row with her dad, that I had to pull her away from. Despite all this, it was a lovely wedding , no really

Those urging caution with your new d.i.l are giving you good advise, as the above D & my precious GC, I haven't seen or heard of for 5yrs+ and I didn't interfere in any way!

My eldest D's wedding was stunning, I was the normal m.o.b, in the background, but on the top table. My D did invite her dad [although said she would have preferred him not there] her granddad walked her down the isle, it would have been my dad, had he still been here. My D was very anxious at what her dad might do, but never would have dreamt what! Their first dance was actually two dances, the first romantic which then turned into a hip hop style, with a bit of Michael Jackson, really good, but unfortunately her dad decided to join them and so there were actually 3 dancing the first dance, D's dad dancing on one side, D in the middle, all on their wedding video , eventually his dad managed to get him off the dance floor, so they could finish their first dance on their own

Thank you Faye. It has been helpful to read the different viewpoints though

You are not expected to reply to every comment yogogran. Some poster do occasionally though it isn’t necessary at all.

As I thught I had made clear in my previous post but clearly not I am grateful for all genuine replies and have taken what has been said on board. I didn't realise I would have to reply individually to every comment. I thought it was enough that I could read them, use them to understand whether my position was reasonable or not and thank those who had contributed for helping me do this. I will not be making a speech. I will be taking up some of the other positive suggestions for which I am grateful.

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Tell him privately what you would have said. Good luck x

Starts at 60 also has a FB page

anything not any

Apologies then, yogogran for doubting your intentions. It just goes to show though, there is a wide world out there keeping an eye on our threads - so don't post any too personal .

Most threads on Gransnet are now on Facebook and also a site called Starts at 60, let’s hope they don’t post the actual names of posters.

I’m upset that anyone would think I am a journalist. I am not and I am as surprised as anyone to see my post on a website I have never heard of. I realise this is a public forum and can be viewed by anyone but it was a genuine question and the genuine replies that were offered in good faith have been very helpful to me. I joined the site some years ago but have been a lurker up until now. When I chose my username I did not know it was similar to anyone else’s but I imagine on a site with thousands of users this is not unusual. I have certainly spotted several that are similar

And the username was very similar to one already in use, which I think the other Gransnetter was a bit surprised about.

Never end a sentence with 'about' like wot I did

Have we been suckered?

I think that is wise, as some people have put very personal details on here.

The link which a poster alerted us to was to an Australian site.

If we are being used as a journalists fodder, Imthink the whole thread should be pulled and the OP barred.

At our son and daughter-in-law's wedding, the best men (there were 2!) both gave speeches that praised our son. Why don't you chip in with the best man on his speech?
Enjoy a lovely day!

Gummybear, that's the thing about getting older. Sometimes you look back and wonder about your younger self and the best answer you can come up with is "it seemed like a good idea at the time". C'est la vie. ?

You poor thing, gummybears what a dreadful sounding wedding. I thought mine was bad enough but your takes the biscuit!

Lucky, apricity, indeed we are still married. The point about it being the second wedding has been made before and in all honesty, the older I get the more I question some of my decisions....

But we are where we are. I made a commitment and I will honour it to the best of my ability. My own mother behaved despicably regarding the wedding as well. Thankfully I have my dad, brother, and BIL to rely on in life!