Alcohol

Speaking personally Joelsnan I think I "use" alcohol to give me confidence. I often feel very anxious in public situations and a glass or two of wine helps me relax and calm down.

gillybob
Thanks for that, i dont want to become too personal or indeed offend, but i wonder why, when as children we may have most of our insecurities but do not use alcohol to deal with them, why do we not have confidence in ourselves to do this as an adult?
Just as people say 'to drown my sorrows'. Does it really or does it compound or prolong the misery?

People are spending a fortune on alcohol due to crafty marketing ploys, is it benefitting them, their families or society in general?

Me too gilly I am a bit tired of feeling guilty because I enjoy a drink. I'm 69, still here and have never caused any 'trouble'. My father was an alcoholic so I am well aware of the pitfalls.

Also, personally I have far more insecurities now than I had as a child. Life tends to do that.

I don't think it is alcohol as such. A bottle of wine will last me several days, others like gillybob use it to relax, most people use alcohol sensibly. However, some people go out with the intention of "getting wasted", some pre-load before going out. We need education around the problems alcohol can cause, including the medical problems.

When DH was alive I would often volunteer to drive home on a night out and so not drink at all, like you I still enjoyed the evening.

katyK
There is certainly no intent to make anyone feel guilty, whatever rocks your boat, just wondering why and what is it that alcohol brings to ones life?
My real query relates to women getting swept along with the money making marketing. My own daughter now has a 'gin bar' in her kitchen. Before that it was Prosecco nights...what next..milk stout with hot poker

I eat healthy, I go to the gym, I do not smoke, eat sweets, crisps etc.

I do however enjoy a glass of wine, prossecco (champagne if my sister is here) or on a really hot evening a nice long vodka and tonic. I cannot see the problem with this, I do not get drunk, argumentative or fall over.

It is my reward for getting through day and whatever it has thrown at me. I know someone will have a problem with this and analise it, but it's my life and for whatever time I have left I shall continue my little routine.

Joelsnan I think certain drinks become trendy. Gin is the one of the moment I think. I have never touched spirits but I do like a glass of wine. Not strong stuff. I suffer severe anxiety and if it's a choice between strong medication and a couple of glasses of wine, I choose the wine. My DH used to be in a very stressful job and at one point went to see the GP with chest pains. After being checked out, the GP told him to sit in a quiet room each night after work and have a couple of whiskies.

Funnily enough KatyK my DH's consultant said something similar to him after he suffered a stroke earlier on this year. He/we have very stressful jobs and the consultant said there was absolutely nothing wrong with a couple of drinks in the evening to help him relax after a stressful day.

I don’t drink, haven’t for many years and I often say to family members you actually don’t need to drink to relax or have a good time but it’s their choice.

gilly of course there's nothing wrong with it. There are too many 'police' out there - drink police, food police etc. My mother never touched alcohol or cigarettes and was dead at 58 after an horrendously stressful life. My father was a chain smoking alcoholic and lived to be 70.

I don't drink, gave it up in my 20's when pregnant with first child, had the occasional one after that, then only when on holiday as was pretty much Mum's taxi until they could drive themselves and have been t-total for at lest 20 years. I was a social drinker that's all and now I'm a social t-totaller. Never drank for confidence or to relax or to drown my sorrows. I was also a bit of a fitness freak so it never really featured much at all.

I often say to family members you actually don’t need to drink to relax

Well I do tanith . We are all different and I am very anxious in public situations a couple of drinks helps me to relax.

Yes we are all different indeed

gillybob I did say it was their choice as it is yours of course. I’m also anxious about social situations but I deal with differently that’s all. As you rightly say we are all different.

As with everything moderation is key. I enjoy a long G&T in this hot weather but some days I just enjoy iced water. If I was being totally honest I could give up alcohol if it was necessary but not chocolate !!

I rarely drink ,I think the last drink I had was at my sons birthday in April.Thats not to say I wont drink in the future as sometimes I enjoy a glass of wine or a nice brandy.I never drink when I'm stressed or worried though and its not a conscious choice I just like to have a clear head and be in control if I have a problem.

My late dads family ,his parents and GP all signed the pledge in the early 1900's so alcohol wasn't around much when I was growing up though dad did find a liking for a good malt whisky in his later years.

He introduced me to it in my 20's .I had a sister who was an alcoholic and watching the car crash that her life was stopped me from ever drinking too much.I have no problem with anyone who does drink,my OH was also advised to have a whisky in the evening after a stress induced heart attack.It can be very useful for people who have difficuly relaxing or who have confidence issues and as long as it doesn't become a problem they are entitled to enjoy whatever tipple they like .

I am another who hardly ever drinks. I might have a glass of wine once a month if that and never spirits. I don’t drink alone only on a social occasion and have never been drunk!
I grew up with a parent who was a functional drinker and became very nasty with it and my GM also when drinking (G&T) became verbally aggressive so it put me off drinking quite a lot!
To be honest it used to be a problem for me the other way; spending any time with inebriated people makes me very stressed and triggers extreme anxiety as on some level I expect the verbal knives to come out.
This meant that for many years I had to decline various social invitations due to anxiety, and was not able to enjoy the usual student parties at Uni ??‍♀️ As the years have gone by I have learned to relax a bit around drink, but I can’t ever see it as any kind of help in any stressful situation!

Many people, of both sexes, are gullible about all kinds of advertising and marketing. It isn't only alcohol, it's clothingstylesand colours, footwear, fitted kitchens and new bathrooms. Remember when half the country seemed to be installing an avocado bathroom suite? Or cottage style kitchen cupboards? Gin is currently trendy; some folk like to be part of a trend. Who cares?

I've noticed the recent adverts for gin, Joelsnan, and am (nearly) horrified. I enjoy a glass of wine like others, but gin .
It always makes me think of Hogarth's Gin Lane picture:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beer_Street_and_Gin_Lane

Finger trouble! That should read clothing styles and colours...

Fennel
I have always seemed to have a particular fear of gin as in my youth it was known as 'mothers ruin'. And remembering going into nightclub toilets frequently seeing a mascara cheeked well iniebriated girls crying on the floor and being told 'she's been on't gin'.

I have never found a glass of wine or gin, or anything else has of itself has any effect on my mood. It neither gives me confidence nor makes me depressed. It is just a drink, like having a cup of tea or coffee, which I would usually prefer to have.

I like a nice glass of red wine with a meal, a pint of bitter shandy in a pub on a hot day, and a glass of cider now and again when the mood takes me. On a cold winter night,nothing beats a glass of home made sloe gin.

But this idea of drinking to enhance confidence or mood defeats me. Looking from outside most people who do that just go that little bit over the top that shows them up rather than showing them at their best.

I never drink to excess . Never .

I have a family member who is an alcoholic and I know only too well the problems caused by drinking too much .