My son lives on the other side of the world with our 10 year old grandson. His nearly ex wife has severe mental health problems which led to normal family life becoming impossible. Custody of their son is shared although my son always has to be ready to take full responsibility if she is going through a bad patch.
He has never been a great communicator but I have always felt particularly close to him as we are more alike in many ways than my more volatile husband and daughter. My husband and I have been very supportive emotionally and financially during the last few difficult years. At one point when things were particularly bad, we were prepared to drop everything and fly over to offer practical and emotional support for as long as he and our grandson needed us.
I found out last week from my daughter-in-law that he is seeing someone else which we were very happy to hear as he has had a lonely few years, estranged from his wife and away from his family. Then I found that my daughter knew all about this and again, I was fine with this as he can find it easier to discuss things with her than us. I now discover that my daughter has even met the new lady on FaceTime whereas we didn’t even know she existed! I know my son is a grown man and I don’t expect him to tell us everything but I am very hurt that he hasn’t shared this new situation with us. He knows how worried we’ve been and it would have been a great relief to have known that he has found long deserved happiness. He has suffered so much and I don’t want to add to this by letting him know how hurt I am. I know I just need to get over myself so thank you Gransnet for giving me the chance to express my feelings!
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