Children at 'adult' restaurants

Mine were taught that the same manners applied, both at home and eating out, no matter where, Maccies or Mandarin Oriental. Never a problem and GC the same.

MadFerretLady, thank you for the recommendation.

My DC and DGC have eaten out since small and learned very quickly how to behave, I think the big problem - even before mobile phones - is parents who cannot be bothered to engage with children at the table. We always sit children with an adult each side, not together at one end of the table and conversation is general, so that they are part of the gathering and contributing.

I think it is up to the parents to either remove badly behaved children from the table or control them. When my children were younger, I would take them outside if they were crying, make them stay there until they were ready to be quiet and then take them back. I didn't get cross, I just spoke to them quietly telling them I couldn't hear them through all that noise, stroked their faces and waited. If it went on for a long time, my DH would take my place when he'd finished his dinner but that rarely happened. I get really irritated with my AC if they don't do the same but they don't seem to notice (me or the children) even if they are not on their phones. They seem to have the attitude that their children have the right to be there. They weren't brought up that way but if you read on Mum's forums, it seems that this is a common attitude.

I too take my dgd anywhere I'm choosing to eat. At 7 she is old enough to know that eating out means behaving well, and she does.
I probably wouldn't take her out after 8pm as it's a bit late for her to be eating. I wouldn't want to be sat near badly behaved children anywhere at any time.
On holiday (abroad) we did eat out later, as did alot of families due to the heat, and she behaved then too. But I didn't spend the whole time looking at my phone!!
If you don't engage a child in conversation, how do you expect them to amuse themselves? It annoys me when I see kids with tablets at a dinner table while the adults are busy on their phones! Does nobody know how to talk anymore?

Yes my kids went to eat out when younger as do my grandkids now- and all behaved impecably(took 2grandkids to the Belfry in summer as part of a cadburys world trip)age just 5&9yrs.behaved really well- ate what they could manage and we all had a great time.if they are looked after all kids can behave well anywhere.i wonder if that lady with them was a nanny or an au pair of some sort maybe?

I took 12 yr old grandson and 3 yr old granddaughter out to small Italian a few weeks ago. They'd overnighted at grandpa's and she'd kept them up till 1.a.m so was tired and grumpy, although I made her rest in the afternoon. We went around 5.30 and I felt sorry for the nice old man eating near us. I was alone with the kids, but grandson is grown up and helps with his sister. She was a total pain, whatever we did. Nobody had time for mobile phones. She had just reverted to the terrible twos. The staff were lovely, the man eating nearby didn't say or look cross. We, grandson and I, did our best, but she was loud, threw water at one point and I wanted very badly to smack her but we don't do that. We finished our food, I rushed mine, and got a doggy bag for hers. It was only pizza (vegan). I went off granddaughter and eating out with her, but a week or two later went out with her as mum wanted us to be out and the place has a child play area, and she'd started nursery that morning, but was a little angel . As Chuck Berry said, goes to show you never can tell.

The mother clearly had more money than sense, she must have booked a table without mentioning children.
The restaurants we eat in are ' no children under 12 on an evening' and definitely have no menu for children.
I hope the waiter tacked your drinks bill on to her bill, let's face it she probably would not notice if she can not see two small people leaving the table.

I think as someone Ho works in childcare this is unreasonable behaviour and the mother should of been spoken to quietly by the waiter and probably urging them to be mindful of other diners. Not good for the restaurant reputation noisy children.

I took my 3 kids to various different restaurants from a very young age. We went to everywhere from transport cafes to the Hilton for Sunday lunch, when they had a kids free offer on. But they had to behave well and we left one cafe , just paid and left all the food when they didn't. They went home to cheese sandwiches that night and it taught them how to behave. I could take them anywhere afterwards with no problems.

Wouldn't happen in many European countries, France in particular. It's the same thing as no children at weddings - they are part of our community.

M0nica - Oxford Kitchen in Summertown ... lovely, lovely food ... though not sure about the gin cured trout (I like my gin in glasses and can recommend The Duchess rose gin cocktail).

The waiter did say they had not anticipated small people and don't ask when taking bookings.

I felt sorry for the children too - they were trying to amuse themselves but it isn't a child-orientated place really.

I can recommend it though - for welcome, attention to guests' needs, food and pricing. On our Ruby wedding we went to Le Manoir .... and although that was wonderful, the food here was better and a quarter of the price...

I wonder why the restaurant took the booking. We have twice experienced good restaurants being very iffy and butty about taking bookings because there were children in the party. We assured them the children would behave themselves (and they did) and we succeeded in the booking, once because it was lunch, not dinner and the other because we wanted a very early evening booking - 6.30.

In each case it was made clear a later evening booking would be refused. I live close to Oxford so I am not sure where you were booked (Gee's or the Randolph?), but I would have expected both of them to refuse to take a booking for a party that included 2 small children. If the mother had just booked for four, when they arrived with children, I would expect the maitre to express surprise and query whether the children would be happy and if possible move them to a table where no-one would be disturbed by bad behaviour.

It is the task of a maitre de to deal with problem clients whether they be 8 or 80.

My DDs when young and my DGC all able to behave age appropriately in public places. There are occasional upsets! We eat out a lot and it does not matter if it is Pizza Express or a more exclusive place..do not do anything that encroaches on other people's enjoyment! I would not choose to take young children to a fine dining restaurant in the evening. I might do so at a lunchtime having prepped them all about being extra well behaved! The carer of the children in OP sounds totally sef absorbed. Poor boys!

I agree that a 8pm table is probably not a good idea for under 8's, a "taster menu" is a mine field, I struggle with some.

In UK we always book as early as possible, usually 5pm/6pm abroad the opposite, as on holiday a "siesta" is compulsory in our family.

I was out a couple of weeks ago with a nephew and his girlfriend and we dined at a local Harvester. We were there until 9pm as was a young fellow around 3 years of age at the next table- good at times, running around screaming at others. He ruined my evening- mother did not bother too much about him.

I do not like screaming children if I am dining out at lunchtime but I can tolerate that whereas I cannot in the evening, irrespective of the type of restaurant.

Yes. I think we were treated very well too! I agreewith GillT I think... no small children after 8 pm. Not really fair on anyone....

Although we are all agreed that our children know how to behave when eating out, I do think a taster menu after 8pm is not children territory however well behaved they are. For this reason, some restaurants do not take bookings including under 12s after 8pm, a fair compromise I think.

We were always complimented on the behaviour of our children too MissA. We started training them when they were very young, starting in Little Chef and graduating to better restaurants, and then fine dining. We taught them how to behave when eating out.
The mobile phone ought to be banned in all restaurants in my opinion. I feel sorry for the children. It doesn't sound like the sort of meal they would enjoy.

I was always complimented on my daughters behaviour when we ate out.
That's because I'd threatened her before we went in..

took mine everywhere we went when they were babies until they left home.No phones of course back then so they happily sat and chatted and ate what was put in front of them .My GC are just the same,strict no phone rule in any restaurant,we dont do McD's and I've not come across Hungry Horse ,so usually local Italian, Chinese or some good hotel restauants .I would have had no problem with these children I would have had a problem with the parent

Good point trisher

I agree with FlexibleFriend in the thread above.

As it happened, I never took my young children to a restaurant of any sort in the evening because the situation never arose but, if I had done so, I would have supervised them properly.

We tended to go out at lunchtime if we ate out. To be honest, we didn't eat at top restaurants.

I think the restaurant treated you very well.

Makes you wonder how much the parent/GP spends there and how well she tips.? Must be plenty or they would have asked her to leave (I wonder if they charged her for your drinks?)

I always took my children to any restaurant I was going to but they were expected to behave and they did. I think the restaurant behaved very well towards you considering you didn't complain but I think they should have had a word with the adults eating with the children.

Yes... not the children’s fault... and we had not complained... and wouldn’t anyway.