I was just reading the thread about looking after gc and the fact that a lot of people seemed to be not only bearing the physical cost of the gc but increasingly the financial cost too.
Do you find this is a new phenomenon or is it something that always went ondo you think?
From my perspective I never thought of my parents let alone my gp’s as a cash cow and only ever received money towards my wedding (which I was very grateful for but budgeted the day on mine and h’s financial abilities).
When the children were born we only had them when we could afford to and considered our health (I was ill after all three) and capability (h has a long term disability) before we went ahead.
Whilst we were only too happy for the gp’s to babysit we were well aware one set worked full time and the others were quite old. So we wouldn’t have dreamed of imposing.
As for them paying out for day to day things-No that was down to us!
Does anyone think the relationship between the generations has deteriorated in recent times? How do and why do you think?
Could it be linked to a better financial standard for pensioners today? My mum always gave me a bag of coal or a cake to take to my gran, so I grew up with an awareness of her situation. Nowadays it’s the reverse. I’m more likely to hand cash to my kids and gc saying ‘you can always make use of it”
The press seems to revel in anti pensioner stories...(stagnating housing market, drain on nhs, too politically powerful as a group, now over feeding gc to cause obesity!!)
All of this negativity feeds into our relationships I think.
I’ve even heard one of my nearest and dearest commenting that a pensioner looks incongruous driving a new car! As if somehow they don’t deserve it.
Sorry to waffle on, but Have you felt the.effects of the generational divide?
Its not the sewing machine itself that takes space, what you need space for is collecting scraps, zips, buttons, fabric etc... so that when a project comes up you can reuse the scraps and offcuts you have collected rather than having to buy new materials just for that project!
Are council houses still built to Parker Morris standards? They always had bigger rooms than we had in our first two houses which we bought!
Same for repairing furniture etc. Its having some spare left over paint, some spare brackets, some mdf, the tools....
....not just the will and the skills.
If you are not reusing scraps of materials and instead buy new each time its not worth it other than for fun.
And you need a ventilated space to work if sanding/treating/varnishing
Are council houses still built to Parker Morris standards?
They are built into new developments of over X amt of units. Which means most are new built flats.
notanan surely it is cheaper, and better for the environment, to buy a little paint or brackets etc than to buy new. Don't they have windows in rented flats?
Sorry, missing the point of your second paragraph please elaborate.
& its also a labour of love. If you can make your house your home you WANT to do these things. And why put your heart into restoring pieces if you know your landlord can serve notice or up the rent and you might have to move to somewhere smaller or furnished?
Renting wasnt always as transient as it is at the moment.
This crosses over with the loneliness threads: transience = less community & less of a reuse/repair culture
Nonnie we rented privately but I had school friends who, when they married, were eligible for council property. My DHs parents (& he) had been rehoused into a London council flat when their private rental was demolished (1965)
The flats are now all privately owned.
notanan surely it is cheaper, and better for the environment, to buy a little paint or brackets etc than to buy new. Don't they have windows in rented flats?
The last thing I repaired was a tatty old shelving unit I had.
It took about 1/3 or 1/4 of a small tin of eggshell which I had stored from previous projects. A few sprays of sugar soap which I had from painting walls, I already had a small roller tray and small roller just needed some fresh roller sponges and a fresh brush. I put new legs on it and reinforced it with glue which I had. I also fixed a panel at the back.
No I do not think it would have been environmentally friendly to throw out:
a nearly full tin of paint,
a nearly full sugar soap,
a roller & roller tray,
an almost full glue
A screw driver
....because I bought it all to freshen just one book shelf and couldn't store it afterwards.
Nor would it have been cheaper than buying new shelves
It also wouldnt have been enjoyable if I hadn't been eeking a few more years out of something I have been able to keep/use for years due to having a secure home
Careful nonnie you sounded a bit like Ebeneezer "are there no prisons , have they no workhouses?
"have they no windows?" The point notanan is sensibly making is that unless where you live is a fairly secure tenancy there is little incentive to invest in it. I have a friend who has a council house. However she has the that accommodation because her income is low. Every penny she earns in her minimum wage job is accounted for and there is precious little left for tins of paint, new curtains etc. She is frugal and happy to buy in charity shops. It seems that some do not really appreciate the hand to mouth existence of very decent people and seem to think they would make a better fist of it. Have a go I say!
I don't think you want to see my point of view notanan so I'm not going to continue this debate with you. It is not clear cut but if you are not interested in understanding that it is usually cheaper to repair than replace then there is no point in us batting it backwards and forwards.
PECS I do understand but can only speak of the area we lived when we married, not a hope of getting social housing without 5 years of marriage and 3 children in our city.
Nonnie Well trisher once again you know different sorts of people to me
I certainly don't decide that anyone has a 'narrow circle of friends
Isn't this contradictory?
What have I done Notanan that affects you? Pray tell me, otherwise you can be quiet about it.
You said that nothing is anyone else's business unless its illegal and that's not the case. If people make choices that affect others they can't stop others from objecting.
They can object as much as they like, if it's not illegal, they can't do anything about it.
I really enjoyed my last cruise to Japan, Taiwan, and Shaghai. Lovely.
This might interest anyone who thinks crusing is fun!
foe.org/cruise-report-card/
You made how you spend your money other peoples problem. You don't get to tell us its not our business, its everybody's business if those are the kinds of things you chose to do.
We are all free to spend our legally earned income on any legal activity. However we all know that some things that are legal are not always beneficial and can have a negative impact for others, the environment etc etc. We are all probably 'guilty' to some degree or another. However once we have knowledge of the harm we may be doing /contributing to then we have a moral choice to make! Life is not always easy or straightforward!
"notanan2" you are just determined to stir it. Personally I think you are a pain in the butt but who am I to pontificate - unlike you?
Same for furniture, if you accommodation is temporary then so must your furniture be. I have heavy older repairable solid furniture because I don't rent
Other side of the coin.
I don't rent so I have to pay for my roof to be repaired when it leaks, my boiler to be replaced when it becomes dangerous, my carpets to be replaced when they become threadbare, my fences to be mended when they blow over, my bricks and mortar insurance to be paid. I ensure my grass is cut, my windows painted, my front door and step kept clean, my double glazing replaced when the seals aren't so good, my walls decorated when they become tired looking, my furniture replaced when it breaks....I could go on. It costs a fortune to own a house - they are money pits.
Renting is the norm on the continent. Again, we have a generation who feel they should own property. Why?
Perhaps the tide has to turn and renting should become affordable once more and more social housing should be available. Do not blame older people for home ownership when many who bought years ago had mortgages of 16%, always offered with crippling conditions. Two adults had to work then to afford the crippling repayments and they lived on battered furniture and second hand everything. They had no holidays or luxuries like cars and meals out.
Our generation did not comfortably and easily get into house ownership and they made huge sacrifices and felt the pinch too.
Times change. Young people have to be extremely prudent and thrifty too to afford homes. Many unfortunately whine that it's too difficult. Hardship was not the norm for many growing up. Being adult comes as a shock, especially when it involves going without and giving up things most of the older generation consider luxuries and not necessities.
Again, life is different now, but for most of us, going from childhood to the burdens of adulthood saw us struggling. It's not a new phenomenon.
Day6 I believe that renting arrangements in other places are often better managed in terms of tenancy rights. I have German friends who rent a house. They have been there since the 70s but their lease arrangement was for years! They raised their children there. It is their home. So they have felt settled and secure, invested in the property re decor, garden etc. Currently in the UK most rentals appear to have comparitively short leases so little feeling of security or settled home.
I agree PECS and one of the main causes of homelessness is the right landlords have to raise rents as and when they wish. So they will often suddenly ask for far more than the tenant budgetted for when they took on the tenancy. The tenant then stops paying and the landlord evicts them. If they are a family they become the responsibility of the local council and cost a fortune in B&B accommodation if they are single they are on the street.
No PECS please don't interpret what I say. The windows comment was in regard to a comment about needing ventilation and nothing more.
There will always be people who can't afford what others can but there are also people who moan because they can't have what others have and seem to think they have a right to things. Does everyone really need a huge television? I suspect they do because we so often see things like a message on a phone which we are expected to read. Some months back I saw a girl on the news who said "why shouldn't I have the luxuries just because I'm on benefits?". She was standing in front of a big fridge freezer, which the programme later said had been repossessed because she couldn't keep up the payments. As someone upthread has said, growing up can be difficult.
We give a lot away on Freegle because we think it is terrible for the environment to throw away half empty tins of paint etc. We give unwanted furniture to family or a local charity which sells them. I don't understand why people take perfectly good things to the tip.
Renting is the norm on the continent. Again, we have a generation who feel they should own property. Why?
They dont they just want a secure home they can take pride in and feel settled in.
You cannot compare the secure tenants of the continent to the awful rental system here
I think people recognise that paying 800 pounds or so every month is simply lining someone else's pockets.
A lot of the landlords are people trying to profit, with little regard for their tenants.
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