Getting dh out of the house, grrrr....

I'm the faffer in our house, I always have to lean on the front door to make sure it's shut, this stems from the fact that I went out once and left it slightly open I also worry I haven't unplugged things, get halfway down the road sometimes and think to myself "did I unplug my heated hair brush" I know it's an annoying trait.

My partner is a last minute person. I am always ready before he is, and he doesn't have hair or put make up on

When we go to an Airport, I am always frustrated, as he likes to wait to the last possible moment to leave, whereas I like to be an hour early (just in case)

Family get togethers, or other appointments. I tell him we need to be there at least 30 minutes before we need to be. Then we just may make it on time.

My husband is becoming more and more of a faffer with age. Trouble is, I'm the opposite extreme. Surprised we haven't throttled each other ?

Witzend, why not do all the locking up of the house yourself rather than "just sitting there." You are obviously far more efficient in life than your husband is, so just do it yourself.

Even if he insists on checking all is locked after you have finished, that would still save time in him not having to find the keys and do the locking up, with of course the exception of the last door you will actually leave by.

Simple solution?

My DH was like that, faffing around. Always used to tell him things started an hour earlier than they really did; in that way we normally left on time.

I m always early if I m going to the airport I m sitting there for hours ‘just in case’ I always tell taxis a quarter of an hour earlier than I need ‘just in case’ if I m meeting friends I m always the first one
I irritate myself but I am what I am ?

One of my sons can be a bit like that. What we all do is to tell him that we're going out earlier than we actually are - so if, for example, we need to be somewhere for 8pm, we'll tell him we need to get there at 7.30. It seems to work!

I had this all the time. What's more, the family are the same and the relatives too. Then I'm the only one who's left pacing, wringing my hands and generally on edge while everyone else must wonder what the fuss is all about. By this time I'd be all churned up.

My husband was the worst offender, taking an age to put his tie on then his watch. Thank goodness he'd never fly, we'd never have got off the ground. I used to tell him he'd be late for his own funeral.

I've finally learned not to be to time, but the look I get if I'm not quite ready is priceless !

My OH is the opposite, always wants to be there too early and I hate being first or hanging around waiting. Must admit I would rather be slowing him down than trying to get him to move faster so I musn't complain and just think myself lucky the next time I think we are leaving far too early

My late stepfather was a nightmare when it came to things like this!

In the end mother and I would tell him that we were expected/the appointment was for 30 minutes earlier than it actually was.

Seemed to work!

change the time on all the clocks in the house so he THINKS he's slowing you down but in fact you leave on time?

I would be more than a little cross if it was me, not because its annoying but to a little one NOTHING is worse than being the last child to be picked up. Perhaps play on his love for her?

Well, in fact we got away only about 7 mins late for once! Must have been telepathy. And no hold ups on the M25, thank goodness.

I've long stopped saying anything - it's never helped.

I do drive, and frequently go alone, but Dd is away for work, so we're both here for school/nursery pickups, for tonight and all day tomorrow, since both Gdcs will be home tomorrow. And I don't feel like doing it all on my tod!

It's to help SiL, who is very good, but it's a lot to manage a 2 and a 3 on your own when you're working full time - plus he has to leave at 6 am every Friday.

Same again next week!

My dh does this too. I get anxious and it stresses me out. I do the tell him we need to leave at least 15 minutes before necessary. More recently, as I drive, I’ve told him I’ll go without him. The only time it does not bother me is if he has to catch a coach or fly and I don’t. He then drives and if late, well there is nothing to do. The leave earlier trick usually works these days. I think it’s totally unreasonable to leave it till the last minute. I hope you manage to make some inroads.

DH is okay at leaving on time if there is a deadline, indeed he has been known to get us to the airport six hours in advance. But he has a Masters in 'faffing' when there is no particular urgency.

We never get to eat together, because he will insist on starting the washing up whilst his food goes cold on the plate. Then when he comes in, he won't settle down to eat until he has found a programme to watch on the TV.

If we are going out somewhere as a family, the AC will be killing themselves in the car whilst he looks for comb, glasses, keys etc. He won't even go to the loo without hunting for a particular bit of the paper to read whilst he is in there!

If he is not ready on time and it is just something simple like collecting a child or going shopping, go without him.

Alternatively, if possible, just refuse to go where you had planned because it is too late.

Warn him in advance what you intend to do - and then do it.

Pop in the car and go and do it on your own. Nothing else for it.

I have taken to taking fifteen minutes off the appointment times when I write them on the calendar. The clocks are also fast!

Do you drive? If so, go alone and leave him behind.
If not, why not learn, it's never too late

That’s quite some school pick up Witzend no wonder you want to get going!

That must be so annoying Witzend can you have your clocks fast or tell him the appointments are earlier. Other than that practice deep breathing and serenity. Rant away on here if it helps.

What a pain in the ar** he is. It would, like you, drive me to distraction. He needs a right talking too. My friend and her husband are like this. We went to pick her up recently on time and she asked if we would wait whilst she painted her nails. We said a resounding NO !

Wish I had some suggestions to resolve HIS problem but other than withdrawing all services I can’t think what will change him.