To be annoyed about the wedding plans?

When we go out with a regular group of friends I now try to grab a seat not next to a friend who is like this ,as Paddyann said, about holidays.Likewise I started to use FB but endless holiday updates drove me away.I understand she is excited to be retired and is is far more comfortably off than DH and I will ever be and really that's great -seriously I'm a homeboy and love my dogs and garden so wouldn't go away much anyway even if we could.She is a lovely person but I can only take so much detail of where they have just been and the next trips they are planning.Howeverfor 20 years it was all about their DC ,schools and exams .I'm sure we're all guilty of monopolizing conversation at times but it's made me seriously check my own behaviour.Chucking in a comment about a recent TV programme,film or book is always useful - but doesn't always work.

You cannot change this type of person, I have been trying for 45 years with no luck.
I haven't cut this person out of my life as I know other people have but I now only see her 2/3 times a year, always with others, we speak on the phone but strangely my door bell rings after about 10 minutes into every conversation ?

Hi Neptune,

Yes, I know that mode of conversion can be rather "trying" can't it?

Just a suggestion, how about on the next occasion this lady starts on about the wedding yet again why not respond with saying "oh dear, (her name) your head must be spinning with all this wedding stuff, however do you sleep at night, why don't we put it on the back burner and talk about something else for a change?"

I think it sounds polite and shows concern for her, do let me know what you think.

Good luck

Yes, I see what some of you are saying. And I'm feeling quite guilty about not being more supportive. She is a good friend. I do feel that every time we meet up I set out with good intentions not to let it bother me but by the time I've heard about the bridal party's dresses for the 5th time I just lose my patience. Maybe I'll try your tactic Nanabilly and see how I get on. If not, I'll just have to grin and bear it. I think her feelings will be hurt if I address it directly much as I'd like to.

we have friends who only talk about their frequent holidays,want to show pictures of scenery etc.I'm not a country person and one hill and loch looks very much like the next.I've unfollowed tham on FB and we dont see them as often as we used to.I think sometimes people just move into different phases and interests change.Not a lot you can do,she'll be super excited about her wedding before AND after for while.If you dont want to listen the only way is tell her or stop seeing her .

I have a friend who's obsessed with weddings. At last her DDs married and she was able to get it out of her system. Before that whenever she visited a castle or stately home she would talk about it as a wedding venue. Weird. I don't think you are being unreasonable.
I am feeling guilty now because I was desperate to show and tell another friend about my DGC. She actually smiled but said I was boasting which was true and though I apologised I realised she didn't really want to have to hear yet another detail of my life which has nothing to do with her.
hangs head

16 weeks - it will be over before you know it. Then there will be the patter of tiny feet and you can steer her here!

What I would try is when you first get together just open with "come on then, tell me all the latest wedding news" them once she has had her flurry move it on to what you want to talk about. If you are as good a friend as you say then let her have her excitement. It will be over very soon but just hope that a grandbaby does not pop out soon after.!!!!
I had a friend who drove me nuts when she had her babies.. She talked as if nobody had ever loved there babies as much as her ..I just put up with it and have her her moment or two and changed the conversation swiftly .. I wish she was here how-to drive me nuts about something but sad?y she died 4 years ago at a too young age .

Neptune
I feel your pain. But at least yours has an ending where as mine is infinite.
One of my dearest friends has fallen in love. She is absolutely besotted. The inane chatter about him doesn't stop. I could be talking about the price of eggs in Tescos and I can see by her expression that she's just waiting for me to finish ?‍♀️
I get phone calls most evenings ( most I ignore) then get castigated the next time we speak.
I could drop her but we both volunteer for the same charity.
I have thought about telling her that it's driving me insane but she would be devastated if she thought she had upset me.

How about introducing subjects that cannot be turned round to being about the wedding. Global warming, pension rights, or make a game of it, think of more and more outlandish subjects - polar bears, mountain climbing, extreme sports and tally how many get turned to the wedding. She scores if she does so, you score if she cannot.

I'm with threesugars ask your friend to tone it down a bit. Sometimes people don't realise how tiresome they are being.

I love a good wedding - wish I had one to help plan. Yes, it must get a bit irritating, neptune, but it's not that long now till Summer. Just grit your teeth and smile.

Oh just let her enjoy it - it is once in a lifetime. Cut her some slack. [
smile]

I had a friend like this who did not stop talking about her grandson. He was lovely and aren't we all proud grandmas? But there is a limit. One day I'd had enough and told her as kindly as I could that as much as I loved hearing about him I'd also like to talk about other things too. She didn't take it well and kept her distance for a bit but after a few months things started gradually getting better. I did ask after him every now and again (the first few times she was a bit huffy and abrupt about it) but now she only tells me about him when I ask. If you're feeling brave I definitely think honesty is always best.