Noisy kids after dark

It is rather lovely to hear children playing outside, but it does seem to me that children today 'squeal' a lot more. I'm sure we made quite a lot of noise when we were young but I don't remember squealing. My grandchildren don't do this - although they can be very loud and exuberant. I don't know where the squeals come from - television game shows etc?

I think children bring a balance to social living and neighbourly success. Admittedly they bring their 'downsides' but don't we all? I have elderly neighbours who have their TV so loud it disturbs others. As long as the 'offence' is not absolutely constant maybe we should try to absorb it. Not easy but try a little self analysis and see if you perhaps do something which might niggle others. Me? I'm the perfect neighbour, of course!

How times have changed! When I was young I was allowed to go out and up on to the Sussex Downs behind our house (unsupervised by an adult) for most of every day in the summer holidays taking a picnic with me and a couple of friends same age (all under 11) my daughters children are not allowed to play in the back garden without adult supervision ( 7 and 5) things are so different these days that it’s been interesting to hear that there still some areas where playing outside is encouraged.

When my children were little we lived in a lane with eight houses, three families had children, the other families were all retired, the children all played in each other’s gardens, and in the lane, yes, often till dark in the summer. Most of the neighbors were delightful, one elderly couple giving them small amounts of money for weeding, another, allowing them to join them on their long dog walks across the fields, one old lady, however, couldn’t tolerate them, complained constantly about their noise, shouted at them whenever they were anywhere near her property, well her loss I think, i think the children and our elderly neighbors got a lot from each other’s company

It's nice that the parents consider your area safe enough for their children to play outside. So many parents now are reluctant to let their kids do anything without adult supervision. When our kids were young they had an 8.30pm curfew on school days and 10.30 in the holidays, though it was usually nearer 11pm before they hurtled through the door. I never worried about them, all the neighbours kept an eye on any children playing out, it also meant they rarely got into trouble either - they knew someone would be watching them!
Try to get to know your new neighbour and her children, it could benefit both of you.

I haven’t got patience with people complaining about children playing outside, it’s lovely to hear them laughing and shouting to each other, regardless of the time of day. I agree with previous posts, so much nicer than having them stuck in front of a screen.

BL72, just wanted to say I like your attitude and way of thinking. I do believe totally integrated town centre living is the way forward for us. I'm just at the initial stages of a university project on that very topic.

We have children who play outside in the street in the summer months. One is a screecher beyond belief. In the warm weather with windows necessarily open or sitting in the garden , it was impossible to screen the noise out. Eventually last year I had a word with one of the group of parents. I said that the street was a communal space and no one either me or them had rights to use it without considering others. We agreed that 8.30 was a reasonable curfew time as we could still enjoy our garden for a while and they’d had a good long time playing out ( and disturbing us) since mid afternoon. We’ll see how it works out this summer.

Oooh Oldwoman70! I wonder!

Where i live children dont play outside as its a busy road,besides theres only one child and she hardly goes in the garden to play either.I do back on to an infant school and love hearing them in the playground and can see them.Would much rather hear children playing than a dog keep barking.

GreenGran78, what a wonderful outlook on life! I'm inspired.

If it's a warm evening, why not sit outside and watch them playing. Even have a nice chat. You will all benefit from the interaction.
If you make friends with them, you might also find that they take an interest in your life, and maybe even enjoy helping you out as they get older. I have a couple of teenage 'boyfriends' who live nearby who are always willing to give me a hand at cleaning out the shed, etc. I have common land across the road from my house. It used to be teeming with children, when my own were young. Now it is just used by dog-walkers, and that makes me sad.

Well going against the grain, I'm with Cressida here.

Yes, to hear children playing outside and enjoying fresh air is a good thing. But at ten o'clock at night?? And in the dark?

Cressida doesn't say how many children there are, but she calls them primary age, so that's going to be under the age of 11? Not much older than that, anyway.

On a school night, surely those children should be indoors, if not in bed then having a calming time before going to bed.

So no, I don't think Cressida is being unreasonable. She's not saying she's objecting to the children playing - just the noise they're making late at night. After dark.

Gonegirl Are you one of my neighbours I also have a screecher living near me - ever since she was a little child it seems she is incapable of communicating except by shouting and screaming (she isn't autistic or suffer from any mental incapacity). She also doesn't appear to have grown out of it.

We have a screecher near us. Only during the daytime, thank goodness. She doesn't seem to grow out of it either.

Totally wrong for kids to be playing out after dark. It's dangerous for one thing. What if one wanders off?

Bad parenting.

I used to have a single mum neighbour with several children who were usually out in the garden racketing about, and often until late in the holidays. I didn't ever mind - they were noisy but nice and I would far rather they were doing that than stuck inside in front of some screen or another. This has to be qualified of course by just how much noise and how long it goes on for; I imagine having a ball bounced against your living room wall relentlessly or shrieking very close to the house would be trying. A gentle word with the parents perhaps if you really feel it gets too much? They grow up very quickly and then start going out with their 'mates' .

Bluebell, you are so spot on. As long as they are not too noisy, the sound of children playing is wonderful and can be so refreshing.

Don’t focus on them as it’s the parents responsibility to do what is necessary. You also don’t want to turn into a grumpy old kill joy.
Get ear plugs and turn your TV up. Or what would be better is to go out yourself in the evening as much as possible.
Lying in bed and being inactive mentally and physically apparently shortens your life.

Just as annoying is the sound of fireworks when it is not Bonfire Night. More and more people don't follow our quietness conventions. We have to just accept it.

To see any children playing outside instead of stuffing indoors in front of a computer screen is a blessing, and children playing together are not likely to be playing in complete silence... but YANBU to expect primary age kids to be indoors and going to bed by 9pm.

Yes but it bothers her.lots of good advice given as Ive gotten older im more sensitive to sounds and noise levels as well.
The mid term will be over soon.

It's half-term down here so perhaps their parents are giving them some leeway.

We all have large gardens where I live so my major irritation is the noise from leaf blowers .... Including my own. Compared to that the noise of joyful youngsters doesn't bother me .......

I don`t mind hearing primary school children playing after dark,it`s the teenagers i don`t like to hear

I don’t think you are being unreasonable. While on the one hand I notice that as I get older I am increasingly sensitive to noise I also believe that objectively parents/society set fewer boundaries for children now. There used to be ‘time’ boundaries - children would be put to bed whereas now they are in restaurants/on the street at 10pm. Or ‘place’ boundaries for adults or quiet activities but the other day I was in a bookshop and a small child was shouting and riding his scooter up and down the aisles. Or ‘decibel’ boundaries when a parent would shush a child for shouting in a public area whereas now everyone is just supposed to accept that children can’t help being noisy and exuberant at all times and at all locations. What to do about it is another matter. If you live in an urban area there will be noise and though some people can screen out certain noises and not others it remains a challenge to cope with what particularly disturbs you. Complaining makes me feel mean and intolerant unless it really is the middle of the night. I have some noise-cancelling headphones which help as does listening to music or tv or retreating to the one room in my flat which is not on the street and almost always quiet.