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(44 Posts)
SalsaQueen Wed 08-May-19 21:32:43

I'd been to a garden centre with my son today, and as I drove out carefully (it's 60mph country lane with no road markings), some moron drove along very fast behind me, gesturing and shouting that I wasn't moving quickly enough. I certainly don't drive slowly, ever......but it's a sharp turn out of the garden centre, and it was raining. The bloke didn't have to brake or anything, so I don't know what his problem was

He drove behind me for 1/2 a mile, and when I had to stop at some temporary lights, he got out of his car, came up to my window, banged on it, ranting and raving.... he hadn't banked on my son being 6ft 2 and 15st!! My son shouted "Get back in your car and drove on!" The shock of my son (he's got a very loud and deep voice) shouting back at him clearly concerned him, and he sloped off back to his vehicle.

It all made me wonder, though - why do some people get into a rage about nothing? and what makes them so confrontational to a 5ft 1in, 60yr old woman?

SirChenjin Mon 13-May-19 14:20:49

It's so true Willow!

We had an interesting example the other day as we were driving to an event. DH went to put out to pass what he thought was a line of parked cars - turned out the 2 cars in front of us were actually waiting for another car to come down the line of cars that were parked. DH realised almost immediately so reversed back and as he was doing so I held my hand up to apologise to the other driver who were were now parked alongside and mouthed sorry at him. He was incandescent - shouting and gesticulating at us.

We then carried on to the car park of the event and of course there were parking attendants instructing the cars into spaces - and of course we ended up next to that driver! None of us made eye contact and carried out into the event - having been involved in a bit of a to-do 2 minutes earlier. Such a weird situation.

Willow10 Mon 13-May-19 13:51:18

Isn't it odd that when we are walking in a crowded place, we can navigate around each other without any problems. If we do accidentally bump or get in someone's way, both parties are usually quick to apologise or say 'after you'. So what happens to this common courtesy behind the wheel?confused

SirChenjin Mon 13-May-19 13:17:15

Oh it's not Gone - I do it too, it incenses the f*%kers. Sometimes I flip them the bird at the end of the kiss too, just to confuse them, at other times I give them a cheery wave. I have a whole arsenal of gestures at my disposal - never a dull moment in my car.

Gonegirl Mon 13-May-19 13:07:43

That is an awful suggestion! It's like taking the "little woman" excuse for your driving. hmm

Bellanonna Mon 13-May-19 09:57:22

Oh that’s worth bearing in mind EMMF1948. I might try that. It would make a change from the naughty words that I reserve for cases like that.

EMMF1948 Sun 12-May-19 20:00:17

Pursed lips and a thrown kiss really gets this kind of idiot upset, I do it all the time.

Sussexborn Sat 11-May-19 17:36:57

There are a lot of drivers who were taught to pass their test rather than as a lifelong skill to keep them and others safe.

My cousin’s husband was quite meek and mild until he got behind the wheel. In a 2 mile journey he stopped to yell at other drivers 3 times. I was a teenager then and totally mortified.

Mapleleaf Fri 10-May-19 17:09:18

I think it’s because they are just rude, Ill-mannered people, EllanVannin. (I’m referring to your post yesterday at 11:55:17). Sadly, there seems to be a lot of them around.

Mrspn19479 Fri 10-May-19 12:22:32

Yesterday, waiting in a three way temporary traffic lights system it was our turn to move green light said go, we Moved in the right direction, an elderly gentleman decided to position himself on our side of the road, why, we don't know, we couldn't go forward or back. total impasse, would he move no he wouldn't. In the end he came to remonstrate with us all he had to do was backup instead he caused a long three way traffic jam because he thought he was right. It isn't just young aggressive men it can be older generations too. He insisted we drive onto the pavement outside the school. Of course we said no, you move, he did in the end but what a performance. No bad language was used but a difficult situation was caused because a car driver wanted his own way.

Tedber Fri 10-May-19 10:39:26

I, too have experienced this 'road rage' whilst doing the correct speed limit! I even had a guy furiously bleeping the horn because I dared to 'stop' at a mini roundabout to check the car to my right was indeed planning on turning left!

What I do is...delay them even longer! If they are trying to push my speed up because they can't overtake, I reduce it (oh so you don't like me sticking to 30 then how about 20?) In the case of the roundabout I sat there with my hand out the window in a kind of "what's your problem" gesture........ STEAM was virtually coming out of his ears!!!

Rude rude rude!

Sara65 Fri 10-May-19 06:54:19

People have absolutely no patience at all, and they seem to be on such a short fuse, that anything sends them into a rage

BradfordLass72 Fri 10-May-19 05:43:34

Yes, I wondered about drugs or drink as well.

Or he may have just lost his job, or had a row with someone or been sick, or been told someone he loved was very ill. You never know and clearly he didn't have the self-control to keep it to himself.

In the days when I was driving, something similar happened to me and, like you, I'd done nothing wrong at all.

My son was in the car and he very slowly unfolded his 6ft 7 in frame (he was not only a weight-lifter but played grid-iron for the NZ National Team as a linebacker at the time) and quietly said, 'Perhaps you'd like to discuss your problems with me rather than my mother?'

The man almost tripped over himself getting back in his car and racing away.

Ironically, his diatribe was not directed at my driving skills but my age, although I wasn't hogging the road or driving slower than the road speed.

I'm glad my son was with me but it took me a long time to stop shaking nevertheless and days to get over it.

Callistemon Thu 09-May-19 22:47:43

I have been muttering it too, trying to work it out grin and thought it was Chinese

We had to cross lanes at a peculiar junction yesterday, DD signalled and the van behind let us in. I waved to say thank you and he gave us the middle finger as he zoomed past.

FlexibleFriend Thu 09-May-19 22:08:28

My ex Husband had road rage and it had nothing to do with drugs. He was a nightmare passenger, I think that was so that I'd let him drive all the time. Not only would he yell at other drivers, he'd also yell at me accusing me of cutting people up when I'd not changed lane. He'd lean across and honk the horn and on one occasion yanked on the steering wheel nearly causing me to punch his lights out. If driving he'd cut people up, get up way too close behind them and try to intimidate them. I put it down to angry little man syndrome. I started observing him more closely and most of the time when talking to anyone he'd have clenched fists. It's very wearing to live with someone like that, hence he's an ex.

Orangutan Thu 09-May-19 21:34:32

I drive a Nissan Micra and it's like waving a red tag at a bull!! To many ignorant drivers a Micra driver equals "silly, senile old lady". I can't count the amount of times I've been honked at for no reason, overtaken and undertaken at speed, rude gestures, etc. A lot of this road rage borders on ageism. Well, just wait till I win the lottery and buy myself a top of the range porche - that will show them 😆

SirChenjin Thu 09-May-19 12:29:09

Urm - it's not, it's Search Engine grin

Searching Gin works too though smile

Urmstongran Thu 09-May-19 12:22:01

I thought you were male too SirChenjin!

‘searching gin’ - very witty! It took me a while though.... duh!

As regards road rage I think it’s more prevalent. Nasty pieces of work out there these days. I think it’s drugs (recreational). Makes you scared to confront any antisocial behaviour.

EllanVannin Thu 09-May-19 12:00:45

It now appears to be the British way of life sad

EllanVannin Thu 09-May-19 11:55:17

What IS the need for confrontation with these people ? They're in queues everywhere too watching and waiting in case anyone inadvertently steps out of place and in a flash are " in your face " Why ??

annodomini Thu 09-May-19 10:31:46

I thought I was in for a confrontation when, in a queue of traffic, I saw (in my mirror) an irate looking bloke emerge from his car and come striding towards me. I locked my doors but then, to my relief, he stopped at the car behind mine at which point the queue moved and I never found out what he was on about. My strapping sons (one of them a cop) live too far away to be protection, but they would certainly defend me if the need arose - three grandsons are also going to be big and scary!

SalsaQueen Thu 09-May-19 09:42:56

Grammaretto....I agree, some fools carry knives with them these days, which is why I locked the doors from inside and only opened my window a fraction.

Another incident recently - I had parked in a bay at a local corner shop, and when I returned to my car, some utter chump had parked across the back of me, so blocking me in (and preventing anyone from getting into the carpark. His passenger was no help when I asked her to kindly move. I waited for 10 minutes, then went into the shop and located the driver - a nasty-looking young bloke with huge muscles (the kind who look as though there's an invisible rolled-up carpet under each arm). I asked him very nicely how long he'd be...and got a load of abuse. The things he suggested I do to myself would've meant me being a contortionist! I waited outside, only to hear his ranting and swearing (in front of his toddler) as I retreated to my car....

SirChenjin Thu 09-May-19 09:36:07

Definitely female Bella grin

Grammaretto Thu 09-May-19 09:30:16

Well done and lucky you that your son's presence shocked him enough but I would never advocate fighting back or threatening mace spray.
You have no idea about this man. There have been murders committed for less.
I always slow down and let them overtake.
Some years back a man drove through the night from England to Scotland and crashed his car into an historic inn. By a stroke of luck he only killed himself though the building was destroyed.

SalsaQueen Thu 09-May-19 09:27:40

DillytheGardener ...yes, both my boys are tall, and they used to eat a lot (my husband is 5ft 9). The bloke only looked about 30 (younger than my sons), and wasn't driving some flash was a very worn-out old H reg estate. The clown grin. I HAVE got a dashcam, so I'll have to look on there. I'm off on holiday today, though, so I'll look when I get back.

Beckett Thu 09-May-19 09:25:43

I don't know where Petra lives but mace spray is illegal in UK (it's a kind of pepper spray Bella - which is also illegal). Yesterday I was overtaken by an idiot at speed - there was very heavy rain and the roads were slippery - he came to a junction slammed on his brakes and slid halfway across the road, fortunately the car coming towards him was driving at a reasonable speed and was able to avoid him. I followed him for a couple of miles after that and his speed was much slower.