I’m so sorry this is long winded.
My (now ex) partner and I have been together 20 years. W He lives in the country and I live in my home in London. He used to visit me but for the last 10 years I’ve always gone to him( (train and taxi fare)
Last Feb without contacting me for 3 weeks , a neighbour rang- he was hospitalised with COPD. I cared for him in his second cottage where I stay when Im there- I’m not talking Grand here. It’s a 2 down one up and needs much doing to it. Because I had Central Heating put in and it has no stairs to loo or shower I thought he was best off in ‘my’ Cottage. For weeks I rearranged the whole place to make him comfortable. in a proper bed downstairs with a view over the little patch of garden at the back. He was bedridden for 4 of the 5 months I looked after him.
I have had a brain injury so I was pushed beyond my limits. But slowly he recovered, and is now ‘alright’
When I returned for the first time after my caring, I was met with aggression and contempt for everything I said. I was told I would have to pay for the electricity used for kettle and shower. ( I pay the LX and water bill)
He complained about the money he’d spent on the people who came to cook lunch- saying it was to help me- but he couldn’t get up for 4 months.
I refurbished this 2nd cottage of his, spending my life savings.
He pays the council tax and the buildings insurance. I was so shocked by his onslaught about money- not a word of thanks for the 5 months caring. He kept making unpleasant remarks about providing me with a ‘holiday home’. I haven’t been going there much lately after caring for him , because I didn’t enjoy being there. He used to make me laugh , but suddenly he sees me as an enemy.
For 10 years now we have gone nowhere together. I shop for food alone- he can’t help carry it any more because he has a hernia that’s displaced his bladder and he’s got prostate trouble- he said he would have it operated but hasn’t. I did my absolute best looking after him for 5 months, so I was winded at his attack’s on me. Is this old age- he’s 85 I’m 74
Or is this radical change in his attitude to me signifying something more serious?
ganmaj Sun 22-Sep-19 18:04:05
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