Holiday Photos

I can see both sides, but you should bear in mind that this behaviour is seen as normal these days so they could label you unreasonable if you made a thing of it.

I do understand how you feel about photos being posted on facebook without as much as by your leave, but this is a battle you just cannot win.

Those who use and like Facebook just do not understand why the rest of us have reservations about it.

You are sadly likely to cause a family feud if you say anything about this to your stepdaughter.

I too suspect that the real issue is your stepdaughter's lack of money management and the fact that she managed to talk you into paying her expenses.

Only you can decide whether you will continue to make her such expensive presents or not. I wouldn't do so, but wait a while then tell her kindly that another time you won't be able to help her due to rising costs that you are facing.

You need a holiday OP - you sound very tightly wound up!

You did something really nice for your stepdaughter (I suspect you frequently reminded her of that fact throughout the holiday ) and now you’re going to spoil it by kicking off!

“Take action”?! Why not just have a chat.

Sounds as if you resented paying for their holiday and if so I would be careful not to offer again as this will only lead to tensions and family rifts!

I wouldn't worry about it, most friends of friends would not give two hoots about someone else's cruise photos and would quickly scroll past.

I wouldn’t like it, I don’t have Facebook and I won’t let my children put photos of me on their Facebook accounts.

But as you’ve given them to her, I can’t see you can do much about it.

Sadly I understand how you feel. However, I think you have to put it down to a lesson learnt and say nothing, just be very cautious from now on. Focus on the happy parts of your holiday.

My advice would be to let it go ...

Your step daughter is very fortunate that you and your DH were willing and able to fund her and her child’s holiday.

A 3 week cruise with family and friends sounds wonderful (even if there were other issues). I would suggest focusing on and enjoying the good memories. ?

There must be something seriously wrong with me, after reading these responses.

If it were me, I would be furious.
I don't subscribe to FaceBook, but DH does, and a while ago, he put a photo of me on there. I was angry. He didn't understand why, but he did remove it.
I understand that you can be very careful about how and who you share things with, but I don't know how.
Maybe Daffydilly, you could strengthen your privacy settings?

I agree with Urmstongran be the bigger person this time. Maybe don't share things so much if family are using FB. I don't understand this need to put everything on social media either.

I might mention to her that it wasn't a good idea to put photos up without everyone's permission (i.e. your friends), but I wouldn't make a big deal out of it.

I don't see that it has anything to do with who paid for the trip.

Take a deep breath and let it go. I imagine the photos were the straw on the camel’s back. Other tensions have wound you up.

Blended families and money issues must be difficult sometimes.

Let it pass. Be the bigger person.

YABU and I think you'll have to forget it. Legally, you have no claim to something you have given away. Therefore, you cannot take action.

Thank you to everyone for your advice.

Baggs the photos were taken onboard by the cruiseline photographer and we received a disc with the photos on.

I've not done or said anything yet, and probably won't. I think I'll just be a bit more wary in future.

I think, if I'm honest, that I'm annoyed about other things related to the holiday and the photo issue was the final straw.

I'll get over it. ??

I don't get the "I paid for the photos" bit if they are digital.

I'd be annoyed. I don't know that I'd say anything, but I wouldn't be sharing photos with her again, except perhaps ones of her and GC.

Why do people have to put everything on Facebook anyway?

I think it would be wiser to say nothing.

I don’t see a problem either if someone puts a picture on fb and I m in the photo as long as I m not picking my nose or something what’s to worry about
You gave the photos or copies to your step daughter, if she choose to let her mum do what she sees fit with them I cant see what you can do or want to do You can’t take the images back so I d just get over it it’s done and you will only make unnecessary family trouble if you bring it up
You sound annoyed that you paid for these photos and her mum got the nice comments and praises on fb I was always taught once you give something away you have no control over what the recipient does with it
Is is worth causing a family heave ho because you have got annoyed Sleep on it it’s really nothing to get uptight about what’s done is done

Bibbity OP states there were family friends in the photos that step daughter's mother has shared on line. I would not be happy if I was them.
There are no photos of me online.

Is it pictures of just the Stepdaughter and her child?

What action could you take? Those photos are ‘out there’ now forever.
What outcome do you even want?

So your step daughter and granddaughter have been on holiday with you and she has shared photos with her mother? If that's correct I really can't see a problem. It does sound as though you resented paying for the cruise? I would let this go, there's no harm done just be grateful for the time you spent together.