Dolls for boys and cars for girls

Grannyactivist you can buy the Action man type doll in his army uniform and clothing of that description or else you can get a boy doll called Ken for the Barbie doll range. There are several type dolls (male) for the Sindy and Barbie doll range.
I remember my son having several Rambo dolls as a young child although no interest was shown. My sons favourite play was a child's D.I.Y. set and he would be occupied for hours unscrewing and taking apart all the expensive cars and train sets he had his explanation being he wanted to know what made the wheels turn etc.
I know there are some rag doll toys called Jim and Rosie they are on a T.V. programme and I used to see them at a playgroup I went to not sure why I didn't ask the lady where she bought them. I had a daughter 14 months older than my son so he had access to dolls and buggies but not interested he did not mind the Wendy house and sometimes went in there and fell asleep.

Well I guess people can argue till the cows come home (what does that mean anyway?

Personally I think its a load of hoo haa for the sake of it. Most (sensible) people let their children/grandchildren decide for themselves what they prefer and most accept gifts for them without questioning if they are sexist.

As I said previously - I've been fascinated watching my Grandchildren (got a lot of them) and observing their ways (almost without exception from the time they can pick a toy, they have kept to 'type' No influence, no lack of choice of toys, no just 'pinks' etc. The girls have jeans sure but nothing wrong with a bit of pink and frills (if that is what THEY want) Same with boys, what do THEY want?

Of COURSE there will be exceptions (as with anything) but on the whole is it really anything to be worried about? Seriously?

Also had to laugh because I must be older than some of you. WE (myself included) did have guns! Rifles and handguns with REAL loud ear splitting CAPS. (which if you didn't put in a gun you could jump on they fired away beneath you) Now THAT would be worrying today but am afraid I can't get excited or worried about advertising. Kids will be kids will be kids.

Hetty58: Chestnut, I saw it as the male monkeys rejecting the 'mother' role by choosing the trucks and cars - didn't you?
Not really. I saw them choosing to play with cars and trucks which is exactly what my grandsons did from babyhood. They are car crazy which is not our choice but theirs. No matter how gender-neutral people would like them to be children know what they like and mostly it is cars for boys and dolls for girls, so it's probably in their DNA.

I was expecting such a response Sir Chengin.
I have to say I disagree profoundly with what you say
It is nothing to do with sexism.
If a boy wanted a doll then fine .oresumably a parent would have bought him one before now
If a girl likes to play with cars then also fine
Why though encourage them to play with things they may not want to?
Yes it is something to do with my age .
I have been accused of being sexist in the past .

When my son was 18 months or so, he adopted one of his big sisters dolls. For about a year, he played with it, pushed it around in a pushchair, put it to bed etc. Then he dropped it and played with 'boys' toys from then on.
I reckon he was lucky to have a big sister to supply this. Incidentally, she didn't play much with all the dolls she had, except by setting up a school/playgroup for them all, with her little brother in the lineup.

I always bought the gifts the kids wanted for Xmas and birthday. We had a very typical gender divided marriage...mum cooks, cleans, irons and shops and dad works...and gardens. Oh...I also worked at 60 hour week as a nurse but hey...my husband earned more as a doctor so made assumptions. Anyhow, the kids boys and girls chose what they played with. Youngest boy loved dolls houses, not dolls, but didn't mind his sister doing his hair with clips and bows. I was relaxed about them playing with anything to the point I had words with the woman that ran playschool and wouldn't let my son play with the dolls house as it was 'right'. They all grew up happy, both boys who are men now are body builders but great dads. Daughter never cooked a meal in her life or cleaned a house, she looks for her boyfriends to do all of that!

When our 3 DS were all under six and we didn't have much money so the DGP would buy them a present to share. It was always something "boyish" like a fort, a football game or fisher price airport. Not very boyish but it would never be a dolls' house or pram.

When youngest DS was 2, a toy library opened and the first thing he borrowed was a baby buggy and big doll! Deprived child that he was.
I used to make sleeping bags and knit comfy woollies for Action man. If it wasn't for the horrid scar on his face, he'd have been a good family man.
Barbie was dreadful IMO. Her joints weren't movable like Action Man and as for her feet; they were moulded into the shape of a high heeled shoe.

70 years ago I had boy dolls. I can still remember their names: Joseph and Tim.

We didn't buy our three children guns on principle (1980s). The youngest would make a gun out of anything and everything: Duplo, sticklebricks, you name it, it became a gun.
Finally one birthday we let him use his money to buy a spy set which included a toy gun and he stood in the queue to pay. "Look what that kid's having" said two other boys in the shop, enviously. My son practically burst with pride.
He's a lovely, calm, kind police officer now.

I took my GS, aged 8, to the local museum where there were dozens of items from throughout the ages displayed in a huge floor-to-ceiling cabinet. The first thing he said was, "Wow! Guns!" These were actually pistols simply displayed among the many other artefacts but he was immediately drawn to them. He was never allowed toy guns at home. Sorry but there is a huge difference between the sexes however much people want us to be all the same. It isn't a question of not being equal. It's just being different which is how it should be.

I always preferred cars and bikes as a kid. People would buy me dolls and I'd hate them. One of my boys loved dolls and prams for a while. My girls are both very girly despite having 2 big brothers and access to different toys. I think kids just like what they like and shouldn't be made to feel excluded from playing with anything. I'm a lot girlier these days but i still love DIY and my husband still cooks. I had an external decorator round once while I was cutting the hedge say "shouldn't your husband be doing that" which made me so angry I complained about him. He was annoyed about that and said so on his next visit. I told him if it wasn't for my landlord hiring him, I'd do a much better job than he had lol

And rightly so Lanclass, judging by your posts.

This isn’t about whether individual children prefer playing with X toy over Y - it’s about gender stereotyping from a very early age which is then assimilated into the brains of young children and how parents (with many years of such stereotyping under theair belts) raise their children, subconsciously or consciously.

Fortunately the ASA have recognised that adverts which reinforce these stereotypes are not helpful - and hopefully more manufacturers and retailers will find that their ads are pulled as a result. There’s still a far way to go but I think we’re starting to see a shift on societal attitudes, thankfully.

Well boys become daddies and have to look after their babies some of the time, and girls become women who drive. Makes sense for all kids to have the entire range of toys. Though I would take their personal interests into account too, and not try to insist a girl who only likes construction toys receives dolls she doesn't want.

Thank you Hetty Maud and V3ra for your posts.
My elder son played endlessly with toy soldiers .
Did it make him aggressive?
I think not.I am proud to say that he is a very well respected GP .
I don’t know about a shift in social attitudes ,SirChenjin.
I think we older parents might have done something right.
We didn’t have the knife crime then we have now.
(Sorry I have gone off topic)

SirChenjin: it’s about gender stereotyping from a very early age which is then assimilated into the brains of young children
I think there are enough posts here which prove that children make their own choices when they are allowed to. As I said, my grandsons were crazy about cars from babyhood and before they were old enough to be brainwashed. Some children change their preferences as they grow and develop. I don't think for a minute that you can brainwash children to prefer certain types of toys.

Im still not sure how people can assume that it is "natural" for a boy to like cars or guns- these are not objects found in the natural world, but created by people, so there has to be some kind of learning to know what these objects are in the first place. The fact that there are differences between individual children which are not gender based would suggest that we should not compartmentalise toys or colours into 'boys' or 'girls". One of the most upsetting things I saw recently was a little boy of about 3 being called "a little poof" by his father for wanting to play in a wendy house. These attitudes are entrenched in some, Im afraid, and can lead to the aggressive macho posturing of young men which can lead to violence, which we aren't short of.

We didn’t have the knife crime then we have now

Oh dear. For example dangerousminds.net/comments/frankie_vaughan_and_glasgows_gang_culture_of_the_1960s Honestly, you're not seriously suggesting parents of today are responsible for knife crime??

Chestnut I disagree, obviously. From a very young age babies tend to see mums as the main carer in the home during the maternity leave, they'll see men driving the digger, trains and fire engines, they'll see women in the kitchen, they'll see soldiers on TV with guns...it's endless. That in turn leads to how they perceive toys.

Im still not sure how people can assume that it is "natural" for a boy to like cars or guns-

Male monkeys like cars

It's not simple

We can try our best not to 'gender stereotype' but it's this way due to the natural world

How far do we go with this? I keep hearing about women wanting to do male oriented jobs in the science world for example/ . Great. But how many women want to be road diggers? Brickies? Even plumbers? Binmen? You just don't see vast swathes of women desperately trying to get into those male dominated careers

Also the prison population. 95% male. Why? Because they were allowed to play with cars? Not sure about that.

But that's way off topic.

We don't need this virtue signalling by people who have too much time on their hands.

Children will play with what they want.

Who do you think is responsible for the knife crime Sir Chengin?

There are certain jobs that I think men are more suitable for and others that I think women are .
I think that a fire person is one such job.
I am unable to understand how a five foot tall woman can be as strong as a six foot tall man and be able to lift an adult

We accepted that years ago.
Men who were shorter than 5Ft 8ins accepted that they couldn’t be policemen.
Those taller than 6ft something couldn’t be pilots in the RAF .

Oh come on - 'virtue signalling' to challenge gender stereotyping?! We can and should do everything we can to challenge these outdated stereotypes, they are really not helpful. We've made great strides in the last 50 years - and here's to the next 50.

No Lanc - you answer my question. Do you think parents (of my age) are responsible for knife crime? And did you look at the link I posted? As for the firefigher claim - what do you know about the entry requirements?

Well clearly someone is responsible for today’s knife crime but that discussion could lead us on to the question of a lack of appropriate male role models in many households these days.

My grandson cuddles his doll, pushes his pushchair, plays with his Ikea kitchen and then races his cars around. He plays with Lego and has a huge inside climbing frame.

I think he enjoys a good balance of both types of toys.

Yes, JenniferEccles, it most definitely could!

I was amazed 15 years ago visiting Toys r us, a blue aisle and a vivid pink aisle. Having had two daughters in the 1970’s who had 200+ dinky cars and 2 train sets, yes some dolls . The cars and train sets were by far their favourites, I was quite disgusted.
Three granddaughters and two grandsons later who have no differences in their toys I cannot believe the apparent lack of equal displays.

I recommend Steve Stewart-Williams’s very interesting book, The Ape that Understood the Universe on this subject.

My approach was to provide as many kinds of toys and activities as I could and let the kids choose.