I think some of the posters so up in arms about the OP not seeing the new baby yet should have a read on mumsnet of the many threads from pregnant women saying first off they don’t want any visitors at all in the first 2/3/4 weeks after the birth, and if they do want anyone it's only their own mothers they want to see.
Secondly read the threads that say they feel PILs only want to see the new baby and are not at all interested in them, the mothers.
And third, read those that say they dread their inlaws coming round because not only do they just want to see baby they expect the DIL to ‘host’ them (i.e. wait on them hand and foot with drinks, snacks etc) while new mum is tired, aching, leaky and not at all up to visitors unless they actually help and don’t expect anything else.
Nothing I’ve seen in the OP’s posts convinces me that she is overly concerned about anything other than her own wants. No offers of practical help, cooking, cleaning, just showering baby with gifts that may or may not be needed or wanted.
I am not a grandmother yet although I am certainly of an age to be, and, as the mother of sons, fully aware that at some stages in life DIL’s families will take precedence over me. That being so I try my best to not be overbearing and to realise it’s not about me. At all.
in the first few weeks. A quick visit to see the baby after three or four weeks, yes, but cleaning or cooking? Hell no <shudder>.
