Cousins

I understand op. When my grandparents died my relationship with my cousins drifted and I’m sad that I can’t see my children being close to their paternal cousins. None on my side. I’d love there to be more of a relationship. A shared sense of belonging almost? Not sure why but I get it.

I have ten cousins and used to see most of them quite regularly growing up but none were close to my age. My family rarely meet up as neither of my SILs are interested. We generally meet OHs brothers and family at least once a year and the cousins all tend to sit together to catch up on news. My grandchildren are scattered around the country and there’s a wide age range. The older brothers argue over whose turn it is to hold the little ones. It’s not something I think about too much as life rarely goes to plan.

I had eleven first cousins, of whom seven are still alive. I am close to one of them, the nearest in age, and on Christmas card terms with another five. We get on well when we meet at funerals. I am quite close to one of umpteen first cousins once removed.

DDs have two children each, ranging in age from eleven to 22 months. They get on very well, subject to social distancing, but it helps that they, and we, all live close together.

But why should cousins get on particularly well? Don't overthink, and don't worry about it.

I suspect you are indeed overthinking this.
“Class” is a totally outmoded, not to say irrelevant concept these days and whether or not children play an instrument, play rugby, football, cricket etc entirely a matter of choice..
I had two cousins - a girl and a boy and while the girl and I occasionally played together when we were small, we were and are not close. The boy cousin died as a relatively young man but I never ever met his wife and his son only once.
My sister is in Canada and I don’t know whether her AC and mine have even met.
You don’t say how old your grandchildren are but at least they are polite. Very often children’s attitudes are learned from their parents and reflect their parents’ views, which may be the case here.
Not everybody can love everybody and just because they are not close need not mean there is a problem in their relationship.

You are not alone Lorilightfoot and I understand how hurt you feel having to watch the relationships not develop!
Our two sons have two children each, aged between 4 and 10yrs old. They live about 3miles from each other but never meet in the park or anything. The children (cousins) would love playing with each other I'm sure but the current generation of parents don't seem to appreciate the joy of family.
I only have 2 cousins and although we don't meet up often due to work commitments and distance we are in touch.
As Sodapop said I feel you might be over-thinking this as, much as we want to, we cannot make them get on or influence them in any way.
I do sympathise though as I feel the same about mine You take care and keep safe!

I'm not close to most of my cousins - Christmas cards only. I am in touch with the children of another cousin. DS doesn't have a lot in common with his cousins, but they do usually get on when they meet. DH isn't in touch with his cousins, although they are aware of each other and see each other at family fiunerals!

I never had many cousins only two that I knew well at all and they were both 20 years older than me .The other three that were a bit closer to my age lived in Canada ,I dont think it did me or my sisters any harm not knowing them.Now after nearly 60 years I'm in touch with the Canadian cousins daily and never see my "local" ones except for funerals .
Every family is different of course but just because people are related doesn't mean they'll get on well.Enjoy the children for WHO they are not for any relationship they may or may not have ,Its entirely their choice who they want to spend time with .

You are over thinking this lorilightfoot families are different and you can't make them all get along together. I'm sure your grandchildren will find their own way forward with each other, relax and enjoy your time with them all . Things will work out.