Am I selfish, a bad neighbour or just plain spiteful?

Well done you

I don't blame you. I'm a helpful person, but I'm learning to treat like with like and now tell myself to think twice before offering my help as much as it grieves me!

Unfortunately the present situation brings out the best and worse in people doesn't it . Don't feel bad about refusing their request , I would have done the same . I'm amazed at neighbours near me all under the age of 30 I would think , who have their shopping delivered regularly every week whilst having 3 cars at their disposal to do Click and Collect thus freeing the delivery drivers up for more needy people . Just selfish .

You are good natured and helpful but they were trying to take advantage. Isn't it always the way? For them to be so rude to you shows them for what they are.
I was brought up to be so damn nice - a doormat who couldn't say no. Where does it get you? Trampled on I'm afraid. Your true friends know you for what you are so take no notice of these types. You don't need them in your life.

I would have said no too

Having boundaries doesn't make you a bad neighbour however, it does say a lot about the person who suggested it. I don’t have the words to describe my immediate neighbours, unreasonable doesn’t cut the mustard, their opinions are not my reality.

To have an opinion one must be capable of insight, analysis of the facts and the ability to interpret the data - it would appear both our neighbours’ judgements are as relevant as Dominic Cummings conclusion on who lockdown applied to.

If you have tried to be an adult, call a truce and shake hands [joke] without success, try a coping mechanism and proceed to the following mantra:

‘May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the armpits of my neighbour and may their fingers be too short to scratch’ [repeat ten times]

Importantly, do not hide behind the sofa my sisters, come on out - further isolation only increases the potential for paranoia during this lockdown.

Don’t fear the opinions of those you don’t respect, be bold, look your critics or adversaries in the eye and repeat the mantra or find one less hostile that embraces your own personality.

Cheeky neighbours I think, you are not unreasonable at all. Just tell them there is a limit on the number if items you can purchase if they press it, and leave it at that. I'd also be considering who I do favours for in future too!

I would have done the same. How dare they...

Because I'm retired and home a lot, I became the postal delivery service for numerous tenants in my block. I didn't mind at first but some of them didn't even bother to collect their parcel and waited for me to take it to them. I had a word with my postman and I now only take a parcel in for selected neighbours. I do get a regular supermarket delivery but no-one has asked me to shop for them. Not something I would do unless it was an item they were desperate for and couldn't get elsewhere. I'm with you 100% on this.

No oldwoman, you're not the bad neighbour, they're being cheeky.

The delivery drivers in area I live know I'm always at home, since living here I've taken in hundreds of parcels for neughbours but did have to say no when it was a fridge being delivered for someone. Seemingly they'd put my address as an alternative if they weren't at home but hadn't told me, if have refused anyway, I felt it was a step too far. After that I had notice on door for a few weeks that I'd only accept deliveries for my own address, delivery people and neighbours got the message. During lockdown young neighbours have been brilliant getting shopping for us, adding our food order to theirs for click and collect or going to supermarket for us. We wouldn't have managed without them. I'll happily take other people's deliveries in provided they don't take advantage, no fridges or furniture though ?

Me too .

The cheek! So, what about do as you would be done by - or don't your neigbours know this tenet? When the shopping comes, you'd have to have them over so they could pick up their stuff and pay you... had they wanted to get on your right side, they would have offered to do your shopping the nest time around. So - you're fine, by me. If you are really upset about this, how about asking them if they would shop for the both of you, next time?

I know it's a day after but I just wanted to say, you are not being any of those things. Your neighbours probably know how kind hearted and helpful you are so they are taking advantage of your good nature. Especially when they have never inquired after your health or asked if you needed anything whilst they were out. I'm with you all the way and so are most others

I think you are a lovely, thoughtful neighbour I can't judge because I have very unwell friends that haven't been granted the delivery slots, they go to the store but it is extremely difficult for them. It's normal for you to feel exploited though and you're perfectly within your rights to hide behind the sofa

I think you're brave. I would have thought like you but not been brave enough to say it, just meekly taken their order. Good on you !

We don’t take parcels in any more and we have a note on our letterbox asking the postman not to leave parcels with neighbours. The reason? We took in a parcel for a neighbour and, of course, delivered it to them. They complained to the post office that they hadn’t received it! All kinds of unpleasantness ensued until another neighbour found cctv footage of me handing it over. Never again!

I have been doing shopping for my neighbours since lockdown, there's no real reason why they won't go themselves but I don't mind. But, a couple of weeks ago I had a tummy bug for a couple of days so didn't go out, when I felt better I explained why I hadn't been round and they said "Oh we guessed you weren't well"!!!! They hadn't bothered to ring /text to check if I was ok and I have to admit I was rather put out .

I laughed about the comments on ordering things for others on eBay or amazon as my mum does this as she says it’s not safe to use her credit card online but apparently mine is OK ? Personally with these annoying neighbors I’d come up with a really good excuse for not doing what they ask and then forget it! I’m sure if they heard you were not well with a fever and cough they would avoid you at all costs. Another one is you are pet sitting a very aggressive dog that hates visitors anything to put them off then they will have to find another person to prey on.

Should have read nerve!! Predictive text changed it ha ha.

I am sure I would be irate! Totally amazed & flabbergasted they even had the nurse to ask you. Sending you a hug.

I was like you Oldwoman70, always happy to help with parcels, keys to be collected etc, but at the start of lockdown I told them I won't be doing any of that for the foreseeable future as I was shielding. The only person to knock at my door and offer any help with shopping etc was my NEW next door neighbour.
I won't be used in the future by these uncaring people.

Sounds to me like you have given so much kindness in the past that they are making selfish assumptions. But where were they in suggesting that they could help you. You're not a bad neighbour, your good nature is being taken for granted. Think you should show them all the support you have got from people who think the same way. Honestly, Some People!!

We've been getting regular supermarket deliveries and my husband goes shopping locally once a week for anything else we or his elderly father needs.

I'd absolutely say 'That won't work for me' if anyone asked to share my deliveries! It would increase the hassle enormously, and it's open to everyone to do what I (and many others) have done, which is to spend the time organising a first delivery and hanging on the site until a slot became available for lager deliveries. You'd also have all the hassle of handing them the groceries and getting the money off them.

You're obviously a good neighbour, but you don't have to be a doormat.

Absolutely no need to don your hard hat as far as I’m concerned although I know how unpleasant this forum gets at times so understand why you felt you needed to say that. I had best don my hard hat now.

Your neighbours have a flipping cheek! Tell them to go and queue at the supermarket and while there perhaps they would like to pick up a few things for you.

I think you did the right thing. Plus in these times it would be unsafe to have someone else’s shopping delivered to you.