Social distancing...again.. !

I am on my own and hated lockdown until I could form a bubble with my DD, SIL and DGC. That first hug was magical and they’ve kept me sane ever since. I am classed as vulnerable with type 2 diabetes, well maintained and apart from that fit and healthy. My DD works from home and SIL has stringent rules at his place of work. He does the shopping for both households. I have met up with my sister once for lunch in cafe outside in a garden centre, she and her husband have not been anywhere so felt confident.
I think as long as you are sensible and abide by the advice then life can be relatively endurable.
I am at the moment at our caravan with my two grandchildren having a lovely time, walking and chilling out in the countryside. I must admit I am bewildered by some caravan owners who chat together with no distance between them and nip in and out of each other’s caravans. Each to their own but I am quite happy and feel safe with what I am doing.

My DIL called today to drop off some photos of the GC.
Waved at them sat in the car, on the way to the other GPs who have enough room to entertain them. They have a big garden. I have just a bit of front.
It’s hard, feeling left out like a sulky child.
But at least they came.
I hope that things get better.

I agree with you entirely, Nanatoone, I feel that if we all used our common sense, and followed the guidelines adapted to our individual situations, there would be a lot less stress and unhappiness. My family has decided not to social distance, we live in a rural area, very low risk.This virus is here to stay, in one form or another,we must live with it as best we can, human beings need affectionate contact, otherwise over a long period of time they suffer mentally-and this is also true for children ,who unfortunately are too often forgotten when we talk about the effects of long-term social distancing. What is this world we are leaving them- don’t touch, don’t kiss, don’t cuddle, don’t go near anyone, don’t go out without covering your face, etc etc....I have had a life, I’m 70, so if I die so be it, but we have no right to stop younger generations from living theirs just to keep us oldies safe (. 95% of deaths from Covid concern the over 65’s) Youngsters are more important than us, so yes I will kiss and cuddle my children and grandchildren for as long as I can.

Ginger girl you are certainly not alone in feeling rather down about social distancing. I'm in a position where I am high risk due to underlying health conditions. My son in laws parents are in their early 70s but no underling health conditions. They are happier to be more lenient with social distancing with grandsons age 4 and 2. It's so hard but theres so much they are still finding out about this virus . When I think about grandparents whose grandchildren are in another country this is the norm for them. We can only do what we feel comfortable with.

You are not alone Gingergirl. My Husband and me haven’t kissed or cuddled our grandchildren since 9th March. Neither have we kissed or cuddled our children. We meet outdoors and keep our distance. Would love to be more tactile.

Today my daughter is having a barbecue for her brother and his family. Their daughter is coming and she works in Aldi so could easily pick up the virus, but she keeps her distance. She is however bringing a friend. My daughter’s father and his wife are invited, so naturally I am not invited, which is fine. However it is quite a mix and when I go there tomorrow I am not sure whether I shall feel safe.

We don’t have anyone in the vulnerable category in our close family or friends (my hubby would have been but passed away before Covid for which I feel grateful as we were able to have him at home). We don’t social distance together and I’ve looked after the little ones all through this as I’ve always done. I believe you need to risk assess your own situation and act accordingly. I don’t go to shops much but last week we went on holiday together and had a fab time and we all feel better for it. We have had no local deaths for 33 days and low infection rates, we need to live our lives but I am terribly sorry for those who are vulnerable.

We are seeing my GS aged 3 now, stayed away totally for lockdown, then garden only but now sort of 'bubbling' . They own their own business so we are the babysitters. We do not mix with friends or go out socialising and decided definately no kisses for foreseeable future. I also have aged parents so am being as careful as I can. We can't not see our GC forever ?

My DDs all have friends staying over this weekend - they are having a lovely time, but this is one of the reasons I am not bubbling with any of them - they have so many external close contacts.

Have had our son, DIL and two grandson's staying now the rules have relaxed a little, they didn't come until they had isolated for two weeks so low risk. You have to do what is legal and what you are comfortable with. Not been to a shop, pub etc. but have had a couple of takeaway meals from trusted sources all very well organised, had a picnic on the beach with a friend and had friends, individually to the garden for a cup of tea. I'm making the most of it while the weather is good and we can as once the children are back at school we won't see them unless the virus incidence in the area is very low and I fear we will be in lockdown again this winter. The risk has lessened but the virus is still with us, you have to balance the risk with your mental health and quality of life

Two GC, 7 and 12, we’re in England, first bbq last week with them and DD, no hugs, SD, separate cutlery, plates. DD has asked if we can have them overnight next week, distancing they both understand, but I’m undecided. I have managed BP, DH nothing.

I hugged my 2 grandsons aged 5 and 3 after four months. I couldn’t resist but have been sensible otherwise. They didn’t stay overnight and we played mainly in the garden with them

Meema that's what I thought and also you can meet people indoors from 2 other households and even stay over socially distancing as much as possible. It sounds like some are being extremely cautious beyond the guidance though I can understand it. However it is not fair to criticise people who are following the guidance but not being as extreme as yourself if you are over cautious. My DD1 is a teacher and could not go back to work next week if we didn't do the child care and many teachers are in the same position. You can't have it both ways. DD2 is a nurse and formed a household with us just before the start of lockdown. She had no option but to go to work though was classed as category 2 as mental health and not dealing with Covid. Teachers were not classed as key workers so DD1 had to stay home with her own children when schools closed. It's all a bit of a muddle. It does sound like the recent outbreaks are mainly young people with minor or no symptoms so I wonder if they are partly creating the herd immunity that was mentioned. Perhaps someone who is a doctor could answer this.

We are now spending some time with our AC, their partners and the GC. We have come to an agreement that we should do this for now. The GC will be back at school soon and the AC will eventually stop working at home. The weather will get colder and there could be a second wave. So we are enjoying this brief respite.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

We are just like you, distanced, seeing relatives and just last week friends, in garden and no contact. My neighbours are looking after GC and other people I know are having relatives to stay, that includes doctors. But you have to assess your risks. The infection rate in our area is low but to be honest I do feel that we may be in for a tense autumn/winter. So although I am torn, this is by no means over and I feel that we are taking all sensible precautions. I have allowed family members to use the loo over the last week or so, but taking special care with regard to sanitizing. When the weather changes I will allow family into the house, but distancing as much as possible. That assumes a low infection rate, if it starts to build then its back to square one.

I have not hugged any member of my family since before lockdown. It feels awful. I was worried I would burst into tears just when I first saw them on Zoom but I managed to hold it together. We have socially distanced garden visits but no one has come into my house. I live on my own.

You're not alone Gingergirl.

I have not hugged my 2 year old twin GDs since before lockdown and absolutely aching to do so. Have seen them in their garden a few times and sometimes helped with gardening whilst there and, being only 2 year olds, they come up to us as before this pandemic, we were really close. DH and I used to look after the twins at least twice a week whilst DD and SIL working. DD back to work as a teacher next month and we don’t know whether we’ll be able to look after the twins. Hard to SD when they’re so young and don’t understand. Have seen other grandparents hugging their little GC and it really hurts that we feel we can’t. DD has anxiety problems and COVID has only made matters worse. It’s so strange - those things we would normally have taken for granted, we can’t now do.

Met up with my lovely sister ladt weekend after 6 months apart. We were so good keeping our distance all day. When it came time to say goodbye my husband said lets get a photo of you both. We smiled and hugged each other!! Completely forgot! We had been so happy - whoops!

Earnshaw, those of us who are from Greater Manchester are not confined to the area, we are permitted to leave to work, go on holiday or for days out. What we cannot do is have other households in our garden or house, nor go inside to the pub with another household although we could sit outside. So people on the Manchester train are not necessarily doing anything wrong, it depends where they go when in Southport.

I have seen my 3 grandchildren (the other 4 live in the USA) but haven't hugged the eldest 2 since March. I have had one cheeky cuddle, after donning mask and gloves, with the baby because I could no longer bear that I had never touched her.

It is so hard to keep my distance. I was in their front garden last week, talking to their mum, and they came out of the house in tears. The 8 year old had cut her own hair and immediately regretted it, and the 10 year old was crying in sympathy. DD cuddled and calmed them, but I longed to rush forward and hug them when they were sobbing. (She didn't need scolding - she was filled with remorse.) It feels so unnatural, to be afraid to touch people. However, both of my DDs worry that, if I get Covid, I won't survive and I know that that is very possible. I am going to carry on being careful for as long as seems necessary.

DGD has a hairdresser's appointment next week. The damage was too bad for her mum to rectify.

Oh, and when anyone other than my DH and myself have used crockery etc in our house, it goes in the dishwasher at a 60c wash!

We've stretched the rules too, as there's two of us, and have formed a bubble with DS, DiL and DGS who is on the autistic spectrum. But we still don't see them very often - about once a fortnight - and generally outside. A brief standing hug when leaving (not a face to face hug). The difference it made to DGS when we decided to do this was very noticeable and he's much happier.

And no shielding is finished we're also seeing our older DGDs occasionally. Very occasionally, generally outside and no hugging. They're getting to the age when they don't want to hug anyway! We even had one DGD to stay for a sleepover, but she's old enough to sit apart, sit the other side of the table when we did craft work, make her own bed etc... and I left her room for 36 hours before changing the sheets.

Yes, there are risks but we're minimising them as much as we can as the situation as it is now is likely to go on for a very long time. We're acting with common sense and avoiding crowded situations and using the guidelines as just that - guidelines. At our ages life is precious and we don't know how much is left to us. We don't intend to sit and regret what we're missing while the clock ticks on.

As others have said, children aged 11 and under in Scotland have not had to social distance for some weeks, meaning that I can hug my 7 GC. This is in preparation for schools returning next week. I can't hug their parents though!

My DD is due to give birth in a few weeks time and DGSis just 15 months old. We have all been extremely careful but 3 weeks ago decided to form a sort of bubble with DD, SIL & DGS so that we can help her with the wee one. We now take him 2 days a week and yes we kiss and cuddle him. DD has found lock down very hard as all the wee classes she took DGS too have closed and she can struggle with low mood and anxiety. We live very near and have done our best to support her (SIL is a key worker) from a distance for 3 months and now in close contact. To be honest I think it has helped both our mental health and I make no apologies. The only other person I have seen in doors is my mum and I social distance from her as she is 88.
I think it is up to families to be sensible but not put each other at risk. I do have another DGS a ferryride and long drive away and I dont know when we will see him as he is about to start school and as a lecturer said at one of my daughters nursing seminars "children are vectors of disease"!