“Curious” neighbour

This post reminded me of a former colleague. If you needed to remember the price of anything you had bought you asked him! When we sold our house and were about to move, it was reassuring to know he’d been around to view our new house! We bought a motor home and he went out of his way, quite literally to drive out to where we lived and have a good nosey. He wasn’t discriminatory, he’d knew the price of everyone’s homes, cars, washing machines etc. Once you got used to the fact that he was a true nosey Parker, it was actually quite amusing.

Often people feed off others' lives because they have so little going on in their own. Sad really. I think this intrusive questioning would bring out the mischievous side in me and I would make the answers so woolly, vague and enticing that they would either give up or go daft with frustration.

If the man keeps a diary, as opposed to merely recording appointments, then there is nothing odd about him knowing the exact date your driveway was damaged.

I would too.

However, you regard their behaviour as nosey to the point of offensiveness, so stop telling them things.

They will probably be hurt, as I am sure they feel they are taking a kindly, neighbourly interest and nothing more.

Think many would Google your holiday hotel but maybe not mention it to you. They don't seem all that different from loads of people nowadays. It's the internet! Just mention anything to some people and they are Googling away. Perhaps the asking about the additional cost is off. Ex Social workers will be trying to find something controlling to fill there day.

Idle minds...I really dont think it's meant in a mean way.
You do invite them for a chat .Helpfulness can sometimes be seen as uselessness.
Just done share to much information with them.
Enjoy your break away, breathe taking scenery.

My sister is the busybody. She constantly watches the neighbours and their comings and goings. I sometimes have to warn her of the possible damage to her neck from all that craning. Alas, I live with her!

Want someone to know something? Tell the village, family, friendship gossip they will do it for you. Did this when having trouble with the local council on one occasion and it worked a treat!

We are on very limited terms with our neighbours, just Hello when we come face to face. So it was a bit surprising when the wife flagged down my daughter as she was leaving, to ask if I was ill. Still not sure if I am looking grim or if she was hopeful? ?

One of my friends is like this - she has her own family and quite a busy life, but she's always asking me about members of my family (who she has never met) or talking to me about people I know but she doesn't. It is a bit weird and she doesn't mean any harm by it and I find it a bit annoying but she has a heart of gold. Unfortunately she sometimes gets things wrong and says things like - I remember he used to drink too much' about a member of my family, for example, who actually had Parkinson's and didn't drink at all. I corrected her quite sharply on that one. She doesn't watch television or read much so I suppose other people's lives are her soap operas!

Everyone is different. Just accept differences. Wonder if she is on here reading this...hahahaha

Some of the neighbour's behaviour is odd. If I was interested enough to look up where you were staying, I probably wouldn't be so open about it which suggests that they have no filter. The drive could be less ominous. It may be that one of them keeps a diary about the day's happenings and may write about what is going on around them.
We notice a lot about what is delivered to our neighbours because their delivery drivers park in front of our drive and we never know whether it is a delivery for us or them. However, within 24 hours it is gone from our minds. I'm not sure whether that is a good thing or not!

Whether we like it or not, we have a close relationship with our neighbours. I cant go out through my back door without the man next door appearing for a chat. Our back door faces theirs. We joke that he hides behind the fence ready to pop up. This summer he pulled all the foliage off our dividing fence so our privacy has gone. I've planted ivy on our side hoping it grows quickly. Don't get me wrong, they are nice people but they don't have boundaries regarding privacy.

MI5 my foot more like Russian spies. I would get security cameras inside and outside home, change locks, ensure new locks on all windows, shred any thing that goes in bin, better still burn before it goes in bin. Record all conversations, check for bugs and ensure you are not followed when out. Just saying to be safe.

Mmm see, I’m seeing this different than most people, I’m seeing it that they are being helpful. Obviously the holiday situation wasn’t of any help to you. I live in a cul de sac of 4 houses and during lockdown I was very hands on helping out, but I can see with some people this comes across as nosey. So I decided that not everyone’s like me and pulled back abit. You say you get on well with them, then maybe, just not share so much information. Shame to spoil and otherwise good neighbourly relationship, because we are all different.

I have a friend who would do both those. She would Google me the hotel so that she could share my excitement, not to be nosy and she would note down on her diaries things that are imported to me so she can send a text to wish me luck etc on the morning of a big event.

I've always quite liked it. Not sure if nosy or just interested. It can be strange but so many people aren't interested in others

As long as they are otherwise friendly and helpful, I think it's maybe a bit odd but harmless. Can even come in handy if they can provide dates and times of odd incidents as you've found. Everyone is different and it may even be their jobs as social workers that have got them into the habit of noting everything down in case they have to refer back to it later.
Maybe you can just be a bit more vague/not share things you want to keep private. It's certainly better to have friendly (even if apparently slightly nosy) neighbours than unfriendly, complaining ones.

They sound like sad, lonely people. It’s horrible to have to be guarded and watch every word you say. You live and learn.

Strange, tactless but harmless. They came in useful when you needed that date. At least you don't have the mad tree woman like we do. She not only sees everything but complains to the council or abuses people at every opportunity.

I agree with Sharon , back a page,
I am interested in people, more so since I am now on my own.

but not to that degree I hasten to add... I love to hear about people`s lives, as much as they wish to share..

but no, this is a shade too far,,, I do have better things to do!

I don't think it would bother me overmuch but I never discuss really important issues with neighbours. When we moved here everyone knew who we were but there was a good reason for it so it hasn't bothered us.

Over the years we have realised some people are simply like that. In the days of babysitting circles a friend told me that she came home to be told "nothing good on TV so I tidied your sideboard". She was furious, tax info in there. We went on holiday and a friend came in to pick up post and check the house. We returned to find all the post 'sorted' which I thought was intrusive.

When we go away we assume the neighbours won't be nosy when they check the house but it they are then they are, don't really care.

Esspee

I’m Scottish Callistemon.?

I was just going to leave that answer there but for those who won’t understand.....Scots people are careful with money. They are also very generous so please do not equate carefulness with meanness.
I wouldn’t mind a small supplement for a sea view room but £30 a night? No way.
We are not going away to stay in a hotel bedroom. Regardless of the weather we will be out walking on the white sand rather than viewing it from our bedroom.

Ooooh Esspee - you've just posted a photo of my very favourite place in Scotland! We swam and picnicked there as a family with mum and dad in 1966. I took mum back there for a visit in 2007 before she passed away ........................ and I've since taken my kids and grandkids there. Silver Sands at the mouth of River Morar - absolute Heaven!

I had a friend like this once. When we first met he took himself off to Somerset House and looked up my details. I thought this very peculiar at the time. Now I keep my distance.

We live on a small private estate of 20 houses. We have a residents association which manages the communal gardens so we have to get to know everyone as we pay maintenance fees etc. My OH is chair of the committee and is a terrible one for chatting to all and sundry - he will know where everyone works, what university they went to, the schools their kids go to, where their parents lived etc etc I guess people won’t share this information unless they want to but it actually has come in useful from time to time. We have the keys of just about every neighbour for emergencies and we have had to rescue quite a few! I don’t think he’d go and look up their holiday accommodation, though he does seem to know who’s away and where they’ve gone !

You will find nosey neighbours everywhere. A work colleague had a nosy neighbour they named MI5 & an uncle had one opposite they called “Mrs sweep the front off” as she always came out to sweep the pavement if she wanted to see what was going on.

We used to have neighbours that to some extent were like that.
Every time s car came into our close, at least one of their kids were out in their front garden (their living room faced away from the road), like a load of meerkats! They watched to see where the people in the cars were going. before returning back to report to the parents.
What used to bug me was that even if you hadn't seen any of their family out of their house (and even when they were all out) , they always seemed to know if you had any visitors, who they were and on one day, even why they were there (not a special occasion) and even the conversations we had had inside the house! We certainly didn't even need Neighbourhood watch, or even CCTV while they lived there!
All I can think is that your neighbours have too much time on their hands! Next time , feed them some fake info and let them get on with it- could be quite amusing!