"Am I being unreasonable in thinking that it’s absurd to not want grandparents to help take care of a child if they are offering?."
Yes. You’re also already suffering from a dose of good, old fashioned jealousy.
I would have been completely horrified at the suggestion of my MIL being in the delivery room with me, nurse or no nurse (or obstetrician, for that matter) or even outside the door. Birth is a private matter, between parents and absolutely essential medics.
You will know that babies under 1 year of age are at the greatest risk of SIDS, which is why I would not have left mine with anyone else overnight until they were older. As a new grandmother, I wouldn’t want the responsibility of overnights until that concern has passed.
I don’t have the choice now anyway. We can’t see our grandchild, until Covid is dealt with. He lives with his mum and dad at my SIL’s parents’ home for the foreseeable, seeing them every day. If I allowed jealousy and worry about who he’ll prefer to chew me up, I’d be a basket case by now. For the moment, I’m just glad he is surrounded by people who love him as much as I do.
Give it up. Be yourself with your grandchild when you do spend time with them and as they grow they’ll work out their own relationship with you.
You really don’t want to be that grandmother.