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AIBU

AIBU to get a bit annoyed every year with SIL giving us a Christmas card from a pack.

(318 Posts)
Kandinsky Tue 15-Dec-20 13:26:10

She’s my DH’s only sibling - you’d think she’d buy a special, ‘to my brother & family’ type card rather than a card from a box that she probably uses for the neighbours & milkman too.
I always buy ‘special’ cards for immediate family.
Also, they have money so that’s not the issue ( I’d completely understand if it was )

AIBU?

Justanotherwannabe Wed 16-Dec-20 11:43:22

Yes. You are I think

Pili Wed 16-Dec-20 11:43:11

My late father had to spend a very short time at a Marie curie hospice , before returning home to spend his last days where he wanted to be. Since then my sister and myself donate any money spent on Christmas cards and postage to Marie curie . Xx

Bridgeit Wed 16-Dec-20 11:43:11

It may help to turn this around, would you be offended if you were asked to send them an ‘ ordinary card’
The sending of a card & the contact is surely more important than the style and size
Merry Christmas . Or, MERRY CHRISTMAS ??Best wishes

Jo1960 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:41:33

Agree totally

Rachand Wed 16-Dec-20 11:41:18

Yes you are being unreasonable!

twinnytwin Wed 16-Dec-20 11:40:00

Well I'm another one that buys the special cards for my closest family. I've just returned from shopping for the last two. I don't expect my DSs to buy a special one for me, but I enjoy chosing the cards. My eldest DS would be disappointed if a didn't give him the slushiest card I could find. It's a standing joke. Unfortunately for the first year, I didn't have to buy a card for either of my parents and I felt so sad.

Aepgirl Wed 16-Dec-20 11:36:02

Nobody should be judged by the style of card they send. Just receiving a card is a lovely way to say ‘you aren’t forgotten’.

I buy charity cards, but send ‘special’ cards to my daughter and son-in-law, and to my grandson.

I would hate not to have cards at Christmas, and live adding all the little messages in them. By the way, I also give to charity at Christmas.

Moggycuddler Wed 16-Dec-20 11:33:56

I used to send a special card to my parents because they were of "that" generation who sort of expected it, and also I did think the world of them and always wrote a special message on it too. But for everyone else, all other relatives, a nice "ordinary" card. I always buy charity cards though. It seems less of a waste and more in the Christmas spirit.

Georgesgran Wed 16-Dec-20 11:23:52

I’m sorry to read some rather unpleasant replies to the OP.
Of course, any card is better than none, but I’ve read previous posts from the OP, some of which are quite sad.
I hope she doesn’t take some of the brusque replies to heart.

pen50 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:22:04

Just charity cards for everyone from me, I'm afraid. I'm not a fan of the "special" ones either. Each to his own though! But I don't think you can complain about the quality of something which has been freely gifted to you. A snigger in private about the really naff ones is all you're allowed - and should never be uttered out loud.

Jodieb Wed 16-Dec-20 11:17:16

Yesterday, I had the idea to take a photo of really lovely card and then whatsApp it to a few people that I don't send cards to.

Riggie Wed 16-Dec-20 11:16:53

Yabu.

I'm afraid I am that dil. We dont get gushing cards for the in laws from us or ds. And ds has never sent a "To my wonderful Grandmother on Mothers Day" card.

Nannan2 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:15:48

*wouldnt give

Nannan2 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:15:03

No wouldnt milkman a card! (Even if i had a milkman) or postman or delivery people! (Who would do that?) Unless youre upper class& maybe thats how you'd 'slip them a xmas tip'?

nanasam Wed 16-Dec-20 11:12:47

that went well, then, Kandinsky confused

dragonfly46 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:12:03

I send special cards to my DGC and my DD and my DS but I never get one back from DD and I am not in the slightest upset by it.

Nannan2 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:11:50

Bah humbug buylocal!!??

Nannan2 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:08:02

I used to buy 'special' cards every year for my own kids' & later grandkids too, but theres far too many now and this year gave them all a lovely versed one- as a whole family- for 2020 from a small craft card business on etsy to support small businesses, and a funnier one from my 2 sons (17&22) for their siblings- but gave those 2 a card with their name on from me as they're still at home.&2 neighbours got a charity card.

Nightsky2 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:07:52

Kindisky. I’m sure it’s got nothing to do with money or you and your husband. Be glad that you get a card and don’t let it upset you. It’s probably more of a SiL thing really, my SiL gets a charity card. wink.

I was in John Lewis yesterday and they had some beautiful cards. They were not in the basement with all the Christmas cards and decorations but upstairs with the birthday cards. I bought 2 lovely cards for my DGC as we like to give them a little money which they can choose to spend or save. We give them presents as well of course.

Yes there are some awful cards, even some Christmas cards which are vulgar but I’m just letting people know that you can get some very nice Christmas cards that are not charity cards if you don’t mind spending a little more!. I buy special cards for immediate family and the wider family and friends get nice charity cards.

MayBee70 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:07:24

You can’t please some people. Years ago I made that years Christmas cards. It was a design withSnoopy and Woodstock and had a mobile of sorts in it and some glitter. imo it was lovely (I wish I’d kept one for myself). But someone was sniffy about it being home made. I was gutted.

harrysgran Wed 16-Dec-20 11:07:08

I agree YABU I decided to send a donation to salvation army and i haven't sent cards i know this might not go down well with some but i think they are a waste of money

GreyKnitter Wed 16-Dec-20 11:06:16

Merry Christmas to you too Kandinsky. I hope you and your loved ones have a good Christmas. ?????

buylocal Wed 16-Dec-20 11:00:34

Cards are a waste of money and resources and special cards even more so. I am confident my special people know I love them without me having to say it in a card. If people want to support charities then they should give them the money along with a proviso that they shouldn't spend it on manufacturing nonsense to sell, they should use it directly for their cause.

Gwenisgreat1 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:00:22

Most years I buy 'better' cards for my family, this year I have had to "go with the flow"
Maybe it's the same for your sister?

Nannan2 Wed 16-Dec-20 11:00:14

Maggiemaybe- sainsburys are right cards! Lol. I ordered a special dessert last xmas an 'ice cream chocolate bombe' they sent me a bath bomb! (I handed it back- i only have a shower!) ??