Is it becoming impossible for some older people to manage their affairs independently?

I can’t help thinking that almost everybody under the age of about 80 must have had to use a computer at work. Thinking back I had computers in my classroom linked to the internet over 20 years ago.

Things do move really quickly, you're right, Nananananal. I think it's important to stay up to date, but inevitably there will be things that pass us by and I'm not saying that everyone should have to engage with every new development that comes along.

Your example of the friend who complains about being left out when she has made no attempt to be included is exactly what I was getting at - people seeing it as a 'right' to insist that their preferences are catered for. It's not reasonable when it is simply a preference, and I don't think that everyone has a responsibility to make everything accessible by all means possible - it's good of you to take the time to write letters, but a bank manager (if such people exist these days) won't have time to write to some customers, telephone others, and so on, when a computerised system is quicker and easier.

I agree about the way in which some firms assume that we all have access at all times, though, Shandy. Even when that is usually the case, it is a massive pain when the internet goes down, or we are without a computer/device for any length of time. It would be far better customer service if they has a back-up plan for cases like yours (particularly as the situation had arisen because they sold you a duff product )

I am extremely hard of hearing. I can usually manage online, but so very often the only alternative to that is a phone number.
Then what do I do?
I asked my doctors surgery to contact me by email or text, I included my mobile number, with Text only against it. I had four phone calls, 2 landline, 2 mobile before I was sent a text.

I’ve reread your post which I thought understood, until I read the last sentence and now I’m unsure of the question!

My Mum was still doing online ordering groceries when she was 93, although there were times when she wasn't well she needed help. I'm not yet pension age and up until just before I got married it was possible for married women to pay a 'married women's stamp, it's not long since a woman's income went on her husband's tax return, but you weren't allowed to see it unless he let you, and I know women under the age of 94 who were not allowed to learn to drive, had to rely on lifts from their husband, most bills were in the man's name, I have even missed off a joint account by the building society, suddenly realised I wasn't on the statements, I had to prove that it was a joint account.
I have also known women who learned to drive after losing their husband and have coped with taking on all the life admin. My now ex-husband had to learn how to take a car for it's MOT, insure it, set up a computer, and most of the rest of the stuff that I had always had to do, I presume he did learn. I myself, it just got easier after he left as didn't have to try to involve him in decisions on things like utilities, new stuff for the house, insurance, that he was not interested in, but would complain if you didn't consult him. Apart from online banking, I had to have a bit of persuasion to do that and still will not do it on my phone, and only fully sorted it out when covid hit.

AAgh, just posted on the wrong page, please ignore my message above
I did have experience of the problem in the OP,with my Dad who wouldn't even have a credit card let alone do stuff online, it was cash or cheques to the end of his days, when he wanted to close an account in his latter days, with a broken hip, hardly able to walk, he had to go to the building society in a taxi and someone had to come out and see him, I thought that was dreadful

well i tried to ring up about the postal vote again, 10am.
i think i got the same person on the phone.
i could hardly hear her, and i think she was hoping i would just go away, which i did eventually.
i asked where the completed forms had to be returned to. i had to ask this about 6 times before she would deign to tell me.
i said i could deliver by hand.
she kept telling me it was too late as the post took 5 days.
she said the back office would not send out any forms now.
i said can't i take the chance, post often arrives quicker.
back office says no. this was the answer to everything.
wonder if her name was waynetta slob.
asked to speak to a supervisor. there wasn't one.
i found it quite depressing. the attitude more than anything.
then i had to leave to get 2nd jab.
trying to forget about 10am now; just to update you.

Why didn’t you contact the candidates - they’d never be more motivated?

I went to a corner shop which is my local and spent £12. Gave a £20 note but was told I needed to use my debit card as there was not enough cash in the till. Cashless society?? I wanted the change so I could give my GC £1 each.

My husband emailed and phoned about the mix up over his postal vote request.
He was sure the person he spoke to was working from home.

Marydoll

My husband emailed and phoned about the mix up over his postal vote request.
He was sure the person he spoke to was working from home.

they are Marydoll, our council office building is being used as a vaccination centre. The switchboard is automated and the robot cant understand you. Every Microsoft teams meeting all the professionals are at home with backgrounds on

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

But the answer to that is to reduce the inequality by providing technology not offer an alternative which will further disadvantage those children later in life.

Galaxy

But the answer to that is to reduce the inequality by providing technology not offer an alternative which will further disadvantage those children later in life.

I tend to agree, these days technology is so fundamental to everyday life that children do need a decent computer, if one was provided for every secondary child the cost would not be unreasonable compared with the other costs of education. Cheap out of date computers are not an option they have to have the latest operating systems and should last 5 yrs plus.

Is this situation an opportunity for someone to get paid work as milkman, shopper, computer tech helper, etc and deal only with real money , [paper bills, or cheques?

I imagine there must be a market among customers who prefer to deal with real people , cheques, and paper bank notes and coins

It’s really unfair and unkind to expect people of any age to adapt to ways that are alien to them.

Even though I consider myself computer-literate there are times when I find it difficult to navigate through certain websites, and have to seek advice. Sometimes I’m treated with respect, other times like a sad little old lady.

Aepgirl, I could once sense enormous frustration from the person on the other end of the help line - however it was the John Lewis one so he didn’t actually say, ‘You stupid old bat - just do what I’m telling you!’ - but I’m sure he was thinking it!

I’d bought a new laptop from JL - it was about my 4th, so I was far from new to it all. However the new one behaved really oddly - I couldn’t understand what was wrong.

The helpline chap kept telling me to do X, and I would do it, but it still didn’t work, and I know he thought I was clueless and probably senile, too.

However eventually it dawned on him - talk about phew! from both of us. For some strange reason the left and right click had been transposed - he said he’d never known such a thing before.
I hope he then felt bad for having thought I was a semi-senile old bat!!

Lovely friend, late 70's still takes a cheque to the bank and gets them to cash it, is she the only person still doing this?

I think we all do very well, I worked at Honeywell Computers in the early 80's, IT has advanced in leaps and bounds. I remember my first mobile phone, so bulky and heavy.

We've taken it in our stride - banking on line, signing documents on line, waiting for smart phone 'codes' - I don't think my late Mum would have coped with it all. I must say having my daughter at home until she was 22 helped, I don't think I'd have signed up for 'Skype' without needing to.

I have a friend who worked in software design all her life involved in high tech defense projects.

Since she reitred she has just refused to use almost any technology. She has a basic phone for calls and texts and that is it. I am reduced to writing her letters every few months to see how she is. Why she is like this I do not know.

Mind you, DD has a friend who is still working in high tech, designing and developing computer systems who outside work, uses no technology. She will not even have a credit card and refuses to learn to drive.

My polling card arrived the other week telling me my postal vote would arrive shortly, so I'll have both polling card and postal vote.

The downside is that the nearest post box is outside the polling station and I can't walk that far.

luluaugust

Lovely friend, late 70's still takes a cheque to the bank and gets them to cash it, is she the only person still doing this?

No, one of my neighbours still uses cheques, she doesn't have a telephone or the internet either.

Savvy

My polling card arrived the other week telling me my postal vote would arrive shortly, so I'll have both polling card and postal vote.

The downside is that the nearest post box is outside the polling station and I can't walk that far.

I take it someone can post it for you?

suziewoozie I'm hoping I can grab my neighbour or the young lad who does the gardens.

Savvy

suziewoozie I'm hoping I can grab my neighbour or the young lad who does the gardens.

You’ve certainly highlighted a flaw in the system. Well at least you’ve plenty of time to catch someone