Neighbours constantly asking for things

Sometimes you find that elderly neighbours will zoom in on a younger couple who they will ask to do things so that ‘ they don’t have to bother their own children’ the ‘children’ are happy because they know that if there is a problem the neighbour will help to sort it out.
As your neighbours get older you could find yourself in a similar situation to another poster on a similar thread.
Say no now, be friendly but set your boundaries before they get worse.

Thank you all so much for your replies! I really do appreciate it. I showed to my husband and it's helped to strengthen our resolve to just say no to the neighbours. I think we'd both wanted to have a nice cosy relationship with our neighbours, but if it means being taken advantage of, then no way! Thanks to you of you, I love your answers!

I've had this problem with various neighbours over the years. Give them an inch and they'll take a mile!

The best course of action I've found is to just be a bit canny with them; they come into your garden, tell them you've just sprayed it with weedkiller or some other chemical; they want to use the skip, sure, as long as they pay for half of it; same with the building materials, they pay for what they have. You need to let them know that you've had to pay for stuff, and so should they.

If they ask for information, point them towards Google.

You are not being unreasonable, they are!

Oh dear!
With regards to the building materials, simply say “Our son/daughter is having the slabs/gravel if we have any spare.”

And the skip. “We will be using the skip to capacity ourselves. This is the name and phone number of the company we’ve used, I’m sure they will be able to supply you with one if you ask”.

And I agree with others, try and erect some sort of barrier to separate you from them if possible.

And keep being civil, but back off from being too friendly and obliging. Awkward I know.

Please just talk to them. So many people have no idea they’re a nuisance, and it’s not fair not to say something. On the other hand, they could just be ‘ takers’. Either way, a discussion would put you all on a level playing field, and you could maybe start again.
Good luck

Forgot to say these people are in their eighties so it must have taken some effort to lift the panels!

There must be a lot of these people about as our neighbours are the same?

My husband has put an extra gate so they can’t see/get into our garden as we were told by another neighbour they had lifted a fence panel and gone in our garden to help themselves to veg while we were away.

We now have two gates on each side of the house that can only be opened with a key.

We have managed not to fall out but basically just say hello if we see them but don’t go out our way to make conversation or interact.

It is a shame when you have been so kind but just take a step back from interacting with them and don’t let them spoil your enjoyment of your new home.

Good grief ! These people are taking the piss, getting older does not change ones personality ! I imagine they have always been "takers" and see you as an easy target.
Be firm. Say "No" be polite, smile and leave it at that.

Could you suggest that they do not come into the garden as it is not currently safe and hope that breaks the habit.
With regards to the building materials perhaps say, IF there is any surplus you already have a family member you will be giving it to.
I have a neighbour like this and I didn’t nip it in the bud early on. I now have stock answers to requests such as, “someone else has already asked”, “we're already fully committed that day/week” etc. I have a neighbour who expects us to do her bins as we are slightly younger. I couldn’t help when my DH was away and I had a leg injury. She knew and offered no help for the six weeks I couldn’t go out so we just stopped. If there is some reciprocation, offering plants from their greenhouse, taking in parcels, you might be able to make it work but if it is all one way then you would be wise to put the brakes on but still be smiley and wave.

Their behaviour is unacceptable. Do as poshpaws suggests.
Maybe practise your responses so you feel more confident.
Why do some people have no understanding of boundaries?

I bet they are laughing at you and have you picked as a couple of mugs. Stand up to them, they are obviously a couple of takers.

You're not being unreasonable, because you've been so obliging they don't realise how intrusive they are being. Time to get your big girls pants on and start saying no! Stay polite but just sorry but no.

Oh boy! YADNBU. I'm afraid I don't have much advice for you, but I didn't want to read and run without saying how sorry I feel for you in such an awful situation. Your neighbours are CF's. Can you put up a fence to stop them walking into your garden? As to asking to have some of your stuff, and using your skip - you'll absolutely have to tell them "no, I'm sorry, we'll be needing that/all the space", or you'll find yourselves forever subsidising them. Skips are not cheap and they charge by the weight as much as the time: why should you pay for their disposal needs?

Nip it in the bud now or you'll end up like my late husband and I, having to be very confrontational - which we both hated so much - with neighbours who took the mickey more and more and more.