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Taking in parcels for neighbours

(268 Posts)
Su12 Wed 29-Sep-21 18:31:57

We have often taken in parcels for next door neighbour who never came round to collect - they always waited for us to take the item round to them - this could even be the next day. They moved out and now the same thing seems to be happening with our new neighbours. I never mind taking parcels in for people if they are not at home to receive them but it does annoy me that they don’t have the decency to come and collect from us. If, on the rare occasion, a parcel of ours is delivered elsewhere I make a point of collecting it as soon as I am home. My husband says we should just hang on to it if they can’t be bothered to pick it up from us, but to be honest I would rather it was out of our way. Does anyone else have this problem?

Germanshepherdsmum Wed 29-Sep-21 18:35:12

Yes I have so therefore I now refuse to accept someone else’s parcel unless they have had the decency to ask in advance.

Esspee Wed 29-Sep-21 18:40:03

It is their responsibility to collect their parcel.
If you agreed to take the parcel your responsibility is to keep it safe until collected.
Your husband is correct.

MayBeMaw Wed 29-Sep-21 18:40:44

Having helpful neighbours who have regularly put themselves out for me and actually are one of the principal reasons for not wanting to move, I am happy to reciprocate , but to be fair, they never take advantage.
I would wait for them to pick,it up or if it is really big and in the way - text them to say when you’ll be in for them to collect it.
It is just possible their delivery driver didn’t leave a card to say where the parcel was left.

Hetty58 Wed 29-Sep-21 18:40:45

One of my expected parcels went missing, although it's recorded as delivered. The sender said that people don't always get a card to let them know where it's been delivered. They sent a replacement but it's whereabouts remain a mystery.

ElderlyPerson Wed 29-Sep-21 18:51:42

If a parcel came for me, even pre-pandemic, if it had been taken to another house not at my request I would not go and ask for it. If the delivery person chooses to take it to other than where it is consigned and someone else accepts it, the person accepts the responsibility to deliver it. That person cannot get involved in my private transaction then expect me to go to them cap in hand.

Apart from the principle, I could not carry it unless it was very light. Then I would often ask the deliverer to put it in the hall. Now I arrange for it to be left on the top step so I can slide it in.

It is like that man who got bitten by the horse when he went and involved himself without being asked. If the neighbour agrees to get involved when there is no obligation whatsoever to get involved then volenti not fit injuria.

User7777 Wed 29-Sep-21 18:54:09

Well I ordered and paid for an item in April. It was finally delivered yesterday. The driver gave it to a neighbour with Dementia. It really annoys me to be told they delivered it, and I did not see it for months. One of her relatives found it in a cupboard while decluttering

Grammaretto Wed 29-Sep-21 18:58:38

Hmm. I used to take in parcels almost daily for my neighbour and eventually asked her why she had so many? Her answer that she bought everything online made me a bit cross so I asked if she wouldn't mind having her shopping delivered to her workplace - which she did.
Prob;em solved.

Lincslass Wed 29-Sep-21 19:06:50

ElderlyPerson

If a parcel came for me, even pre-pandemic, if it had been taken to another house not at my request I would not go and ask for it. If the delivery person chooses to take it to other than where it is consigned and someone else accepts it, the person accepts the responsibility to deliver it. That person cannot get involved in my private transaction then expect me to go to them cap in hand.

Apart from the principle, I could not carry it unless it was very light. Then I would often ask the deliverer to put it in the hall. Now I arrange for it to be left on the top step so I can slide it in.

It is like that man who got bitten by the horse when he went and involved himself without being asked. If the neighbour agrees to get involved when there is no obligation whatsoever to get involved then volenti not fit injuria.

Guess your neighbours don’t take parcels in for you then?

Zoejory Wed 29-Sep-21 19:14:29

If a parcel came for me, even pre-pandemic, if it had been taken to another house not at my request I would not go and ask for it.

So what would you do? What if the person didn't bring it round? Would you happily pay for an item that you'd not got?

My very elderly neighbour would kindly take in parcels for us. There is no way he could have brought them round as he wasn't very mobile. But he was happy to take stuff in and happy when I went to get them.

Nice neighbours are great to have.

kittylester Wed 29-Sep-21 19:20:43

For goodness sake. Give and take!

tanith Wed 29-Sep-21 19:20:49

I often take in parcels for my working neighbours if the don't pop round for it ill give them a shout or a knock. I don't mind a bit as i know they'll be there for me should I need them.

Kali2 Wed 29-Sep-21 19:22:27

Of course I do. They do the same for me. Having nice neighbours and being nice back, is one of the joys of life.

Rosie51 Wed 29-Sep-21 19:27:37

We are known for being willing to take in a parcel for the neighbours. The last lot told the people who bought their house that they'd have no problems with missed deliveries! I'm happy to take a parcel in, always ask the delivery driver to leave a note telling them where it is. I do expect people to come and collect their parcel, and it does annoy me a bit the house across the road never do, so we're back and forth knocking to see if they're in, sometimes for a couple of days. Of course there's rarely anybody about when we get an attempted delivery while we're out, but that's life.
ElderlyPerson I'm sorry but I find your attitude very mean spirited. Your neighbour will have thought they were being helpful accepting your parcel, maybe it was something you really needed, and they'd save you the job of either going to the sorting office or arranging a re-delivery. If I thought the neighbours across the road felt as you do I'd never take in another parcel for them! As it is they seem grateful enough when we do catch them.

SueDonim Wed 29-Sep-21 19:30:48

If a parcel came for me, even pre-pandemic, if it had been taken to another house not at my request I would not go and ask for it.

Presumably a parcel only gets taken elsewhere because the named recipient isn’t available to take delivery. To not go and collect the parcel seems to be cutting off one’s nose to spite one’s face. confused

It’s give and take here, our three houses all take in parcels for each other. It’s no big deal and gives us a chance to catch up on news, especially in winter when we don’t see our neighbours so often.

ElderlyPerson Wed 29-Sep-21 19:32:41

Zoejory

*If a parcel came for me, even pre-pandemic, if it had been taken to another house not at my request I would not go and ask for it.*

So what would you do? What if the person didn't bring it round? Would you happily pay for an item that you'd not got?

My very elderly neighbour would kindly take in parcels for us. There is no way he could have brought them round as he wasn't very mobile. But he was happy to take stuff in and happy when I went to get them.

Nice neighbours are great to have.

Well if the delivery person breaks the rules and they take it in, they are taking on the obligation. It is in my opinion unreasonable to take a parcel in with no authority to do so and then expect the person to whom it is addressed to go to them and get huffy if the person does not do so.

Just say no when asked by the delivery driver.

MerylStreep Wed 29-Sep-21 19:36:32

Sometimes my porch gets a bit crowded with neighbours parcels 😄
ElderlyPerson
What’s with the cap in hand it’s what friendly neighbours do.
But as you never see them I suppose the situation wouldn’t arise.

ElderlyPerson Wed 29-Sep-21 19:38:33

SueDonim

^If a parcel came for me, even pre-pandemic, if it had been taken to another house not at my request I would not go and ask for it.^

Presumably a parcel only gets taken elsewhere because the named recipient isn’t available to take delivery. To not go and collect the parcel seems to be cutting off one’s nose to spite one’s face. confused

It’s give and take here, our three houses all take in parcels for each other. It’s no big deal and gives us a chance to catch up on news, especially in winter when we don’t see our neighbours so often.

That presumption is wrong. It has been known for a driver who has a parcel for each of two houses near each other to go to one of the houses and try to leave them both there so as to avoid going to two houses. Rare but it has happened.

And some people deem nobody at home if nobody is there within about five seconds.

Forsythia Wed 29-Sep-21 19:40:02

I take parcels for my neighbours either side, as they do for me. No problems at all. They collect when they return home and we do likewise.

Grannynannywanny Wed 29-Sep-21 19:40:46

I’ve noticed sometimes when I order online that the company will email me to say it’s been left with a neighbour. They don’t leave a card. So unless I actively check my emails I’m not aware I’ve missed a delivery and my package is with a neighbour.

Zoejory Wed 29-Sep-21 19:41:04

Well, I guess I'm very lucky not to have you as my neighbour, elderlyperson!

My neighbour is more than happy to help out and we end up having a natter and everyone is happy.

Just try it sometime. It might make you happy.

MayBeMaw Wed 29-Sep-21 19:51:24

ElderlyPerson

SueDonim

If a parcel came for me, even pre-pandemic, if it had been taken to another house not at my request I would not go and ask for it.

Presumably a parcel only gets taken elsewhere because the named recipient isn’t available to take delivery. To not go and collect the parcel seems to be cutting off one’s nose to spite one’s face. confused

It’s give and take here, our three houses all take in parcels for each other. It’s no big deal and gives us a chance to catch up on news, especially in winter when we don’t see our neighbours so often.

That presumption is wrong. It has been known for a driver who has a parcel for each of two houses near each other to go to one of the houses and try to leave them both there so as to avoid going to two houses. Rare but it has happened.

And some people deem nobody at home if nobody is there within about five seconds.

I’m very surprised by this.
Couriers (since the pandemic- maybe before) will photograph your parcel on your doorstep or in the ‘safe place” you have opted for as an alternative if you are out. This photograph will then be on your email to say the parcel has been delivered.
As shown here

annodomini Wed 29-Sep-21 19:51:38

I have a tacit agreement with my neighbour that we will take in each other's packages. Why on earth not? There hasn't been much to-ing and fro-ing since lockdowns began, since it seems that couriers have at last found out where her safe place is, and I'm at home more often than not, though out and about more than last year.

ElderlyPerson Wed 29-Sep-21 19:54:14

Rosie51

We are known for being willing to take in a parcel for the neighbours. The last lot told the people who bought their house that they'd have no problems with missed deliveries! I'm happy to take a parcel in, always ask the delivery driver to leave a note telling them where it is. I do expect people to come and collect their parcel, and it does annoy me a bit the house across the road never do, so we're back and forth knocking to see if they're in, sometimes for a couple of days. Of course there's rarely anybody about when we get an attempted delivery while we're out, but that's life.
ElderlyPerson I'm sorry but I find your attitude very mean spirited. Your neighbour will have thought they were being helpful accepting your parcel, maybe it was something you really needed, and they'd save you the job of either going to the sorting office or arranging a re-delivery. If I thought the neighbours across the road felt as you do I'd never take in another parcel for them! As it is they seem grateful enough when we do catch them.

In my opnion you have no basis to be annoyed. Either do it with happiness or do not get involved. If you choose to get involved then you are voluntarily taking on the responsibility of the delivery job.

Early Wed 29-Sep-21 20:13:16

I live in a lane of twenty two houses. We all know one another by name and help one another out in all kinds of ways.

There’s a tendency now for delivery people to leave parcels on steps which I am quite happy for them to do for my stuff (it’s usually a book) but not everyone is, especially if they are out a work or it’s rainy. So we take stuff in for one another. A quick text or a note through the door so say I am holding something for them and they do the same if they see I am out. I drop the item round or they come and pick it up. It’s not a big thing, it really isn’t. So long as it isn’t a big thing like a fridge or a telly, that’s too big to handle. Help someone out and they will help you one day.

Yes, Hermes do the photo thing. It’s to do with their tracking to confirm someone had taken delivery of it to complete the transaction. I am ashamed that my grubby door mat is now recorded for posterity many times in the Hermes database. smile

I even have an arrangement with the woman who lives in the parallel lane, same house number. We often get misdeliveries for one another. I live in the Lane. She lives in the Drive. It happens. We’ve become friends as, thorough misdeliveries, we got to know which magazines we each subscibe to. We have similar tastes so now we exchange them with one another once read. She gets my Country Walking. I get her National Geographic. Win, win.