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AIBU

Taking in parcels for neighbours

(270 Posts)
Su12 Wed 29-Sept-21 18:31:57

We have often taken in parcels for next door neighbour who never came round to collect - they always waited for us to take the item round to them - this could even be the next day. They moved out and now the same thing seems to be happening with our new neighbours. I never mind taking parcels in for people if they are not at home to receive them but it does annoy me that they don’t have the decency to come and collect from us. If, on the rare occasion, a parcel of ours is delivered elsewhere I make a point of collecting it as soon as I am home. My husband says we should just hang on to it if they can’t be bothered to pick it up from us, but to be honest I would rather it was out of our way. Does anyone else have this problem?

Elegran Thu 30-Sept-21 11:14:37

ElderlyPerson

Why do people have the belief that the onus is on the person to whom the parcel is addressed to come and collect it?

Because the person it is addressed to wanted it, ordered it, and paid for it. The delivery company contracted to deliver it to them, or to their nominated representative. If the neighbour has not been previously nominated, but has been asked by the delivery company, as a favour to take it in, the neighbour has no contractual obligation at all, even if they sign for it, beyond taking care of it until it's rightful owner can come and collect it. If they are public-spirited enough extend the favour to lugging it round, whatever the weather or the state of their own health, they are doing it out of the goodness of their heart and should be thanked.

Petera Thu 30-Sept-21 11:07:32

ElderlyPerson

Why do people have the belief that the onus is on the person to whom the parcel is addressed to come and collect it?

Because someone is doing you a favour, not entering into a contract to take full responsibility for your online order.

hilz Thu 30-Sept-21 11:05:39

Neighbours both sides have regular deliveries but if they expect me to take a parcel in for them will ask me first and I do the same. Obviously there may times where I am randomly asked by delivery driver to take in a parcel and its my choice isnt it to say yes or no ? If it were not collected by later that evening I will tap the door and deliver or ask them to collect and they do the same for me. I am blessed with nice neighbours though and its not some thing i would do for everyone in my street.

SachaMac Thu 30-Sept-21 11:05:22

I’m lucky to live on a small cul de sac where the neighbours are all friendly & we are quite happy to take parcels in for each other if necessary. I will always nip round to collect on my return if a card has been left saying who has the package. Luckily my neighbour is the same & always comes round quite sharpish to pick up his rather heavy box of beers that occasionally get left here. I am currently having recipe food boxes delivered weekly and if I’m out the courier always leave the box by the back door which I’m quite happy with. I think if you live on a long busy road and don’t know your neighbours it could be more of a problem.

lemsip Thu 30-Sept-21 11:04:44

Betty18 me too.

lemsip Thu 30-Sept-21 11:03:21

unfortunately the delivery person does not always put a card through the door telling them where their parcel is even though he says he will.
I live in flats with security entrance and a person stuck an offensive note on the entrance door 'asking who has his parcel' he had no card telling him what number flat he left it at....... the person who took in the parcel was not always in so shoyuld not have taken the parcel in my opinion..........
so if no one calls to collect a parcel you've taken in,, i'ts because they have no idea you have it because a card hasn't been left.

weather Thu 30-Sept-21 11:02:25

Last year we found a large heavy poly-bag full of fresh pork on our very large outside letterbox...we spent ages trying to find out who it was for as only the supplier's name was on the label who we couldn't contact! As we had only a small fridge and freezer that were full we had to phone and knock on many neighbor's doors immediately to prevent it going off....As we are elderly and were suppose to be exercising considerable caution due to covid and health issues this took a lot of time and effort, but we did find out eventually it was for a house across the road a few houses down the road for someone we didn't know so we were able to deliver it to them.

Betty18 Thu 30-Sept-21 11:02:18

I quite often say no to accepting neighbours parcels. You’re not obligated at all. Just don’t get involved .( shhh they won’t know)

Grannynannywanny Thu 30-Sept-21 11:01:35

Why do people have the belief that the onus is on the person to whom the parcel is addressed to come and collect it?

Good manners surely?

Granmarderby10 Thu 30-Sept-21 11:00:21

Gosh after reading this thread I have realised that there are some very odd people about. Our neighbours are approachable polite and friendly. I can’t imagine why someone would have the temerity to snatch a parcel from the hands of a neighbour who had kindly taken it in for them. Shocking. Any way nowt so strange as folks

Tizliz Thu 30-Sept-21 10:59:26

Courier asked once if he could leave a delivery for a neighbour with us. Turned out to be 6 big boxes. Neighbour was away so we couldn’t use our garage all week. But he is a good neighbour so no problem.

ElderlyPerson Thu 30-Sept-21 10:56:33

Why do people have the belief that the onus is on the person to whom the parcel is addressed to come and collect it?

Fronkydonky Thu 30-Sept-21 10:55:54

I won a bottle of Prosecco a few years ago and apparently nobody was in when it was delivered, which is most unusual as my husband is medically retired and registered disabled. A newish neighbour signed for it unbeknownst to me and did not bring it down to me. I only found this info out as I contacted the company to enquire if it had been dispatched a week later. They gave me a copy of the signature and her address, as proof. The courier couldn’t be bothered to pop a note through my door as I live at the bottom of the cul de sac. When I knocked on her door nine days after she had signed for it, she said “ ah I knew you’d come for it sooner or later- I opened it as I assumed it was my new running trainers.” I was absolutely gobsmacked that she’d just opened it without checking the address and totally amazed she had made no effort to pop it down to me. I told her the courier had left no card to inform me of its whereabouts but she wasn’t bothered in the least that she’d held on to my parcel for nine days. If I take a parcel for a neighbour I always keep an eye out for a light on in house or a car on their driveway then I immediately deliver it. My daughter’s Graze box got eaten by a teenage neighbour a few years ago (because the post man mis-delivered it )and bragged about it on social media. Another young neighbour noticed the brag and raised the alarm with my daughter. That caused a whole lot of trouble especially when she and her mother denied it had happened and then another older neighbour covered for the teen by saying it must have been her Graze box they mis-delivered. Needless to say- we never ever accepted parcels for the thief whilst she lived in the cul de sac.

LuckyFour Thu 30-Sept-21 10:54:03

No wonder the high street is in such a mess, it looks like everyone is buying everything on line. Amazon is making trillions and the high street is disappearing.
Such a shame.

Georgesgran Thu 30-Sept-21 10:51:05

On one side of me are the Neighbours from Hell. 7 adults in the house, 6 cars and parking for 2 and they all drive like Lewis Hamilton, coming and going, day and night.
One Easter Thursday, we took in yet another parcel for them. As usual, they didn’t come to collect it, so DH took it over several times, but despite being in, no-one would answer the door. Eventually, on Easter Sunday DH ‘caught’ the man of the house, who grudgingly took the parcel - in full view of another neighbour, who was appalled by his attitude and said he couldn’t believe what he’d just seen.
The parcel turned out to be a mobile phone which the neighbours had, by then, reported as ‘missing’. Naturally, DH had signed for delivery and we were contacted several times to explain the situation, as a replacement phone was about to be sent! We were virtually accused of theft!
Needless to say we then refused to accept anything for them after that. I’ll gladly take in anything for anyone else and often do.

cc Thu 30-Sept-21 10:50:51

I should add that I always used to refuse to accept parcels for people I didn't know, otherwise once the couriers know that you're willing to take in parcels they'll leave parcels for the whole neighbourhood with you.

Missiseff Thu 30-Sept-21 10:49:37

I don't mind either way, there's much bigger things going on in the world to be arsey about.

cc Thu 30-Sept-21 10:48:16

Yes, I used to have this problem at our old house. Our immediate neighbours always had things delivered after they'd gone away for the summer, really irritating. However we all have a porch where we live now so our parcels can be left there.

polnan Thu 30-Sept-21 10:47:31

well I needed a bit of a larf today..

I don`t "know " my neighbours very much, they all seem to be at work..

I don`t mind taking in a parcel for any of them,, I am usually asked by the delivery person, then I say, put a card through their door, they confirm.. then I expect and get the neighbour to collect...

I wish I did communicate more with my neighbours as I get lonely,, so I find it strange that people can be so.... unneighbourly?

hugshelp Thu 30-Sept-21 10:47:03

We have neighbours who live across a busy road that did this. I'm sight impaired so I prefer not to cross the road more often than I need to. I simply took to asking the courier to make sure they carded the neighbour as I wouldn't be taking it across and waiting. They came eventually. After a few times of me mentioning that I'd had it a few days and hoped it wasn't urgent they took the hint and come more promptly now.

kittylester Thu 30-Sept-21 10:46:56

Love it elegran

Zoejory Thu 30-Sept-21 10:45:19

Oh this is all getting terribly amusing!

Mapleleaf Thu 30-Sept-21 10:44:16

I don’t really see a problem as long as you and your neighbours get along. I’m happy to take in a parcel and then either I will take it to the neighbour once I see they are home and it’s not too heavy, or wait for them to come for it (which is what usually happens). If it was too heavy for me and I couldn’t take it, I’d wait a while for the neighbour to call round for it or pop over and explain I have a parcel for them that is too heavy for me to bring over. I suppose if I didn’t get along with my neighbours then I wouldn’t accept the parcel, but happily, we all get along and look out for each other without interfering.

Danma Thu 30-Sept-21 10:44:16

Reminds me of a delivery for me last year
I’d gone out, unaware that the ‘parcel’ was being delivered that day. I returned home to find a note from a neighbour several doors down to tell me they’d got something for me

I arrived on their drive to discover I couldn’t even reach their doorbell as the delivery driver had left a box containing a complete BBQ on their doorstep. ?
It took two of us plus a sack truck to move it down the road to my house.
Luckily the neighbours were very nice about it
(No note from the delivery company though)

christine96777 Thu 30-Sept-21 10:42:08

Not only did our old neighbour not collect there parcels, but when we took them round they would not open the door or acknowledge us, we just stopped doing it,