Aibu regarding OH

Wandering round shops looking at stuff with someone I don’t particularly like ( that’s how your op comes across) sounds like hell to me.
But then I’ve never just wandered meaninglessly round shops.
Do you not have any friends or family to go out with?

Quite honestly, the fact that he is happy to pop to the shops for milk etc while you get dressed, plus actually doing some of the housework is a real plus.
If you want him to vacuum upstairs as well, why not ask him to ? You can easily say that you struggle with carrying the vacuum up and down stairs. Same with changing the beds!
I'm sorry, but I actually found your post difficult to read in places, so not sure what you are actually complaining about!
He obviously does things that he sees as "a mans job" such as the car maintenance and is quite happy to go out with you for a coffee. If you want to go somewhere else, you may just need to go on your own or, because he seems to be a man of habit, just simply either say that you would like to go somewhere different for a change or have a brief explanation of why you want to go there.
Maybe it's just me being divorced, but I don't understand the idea that once couples are both retired that means that you are instantly joined at the hip!
The happiest retired couples I know have their own social circles to go off and do things with and then tend to meet up or go out for lunch or coffee often with other friends.

I often go to places without OH and he goes to places without me. Then we do things together like lunch out and the cinema. Why don’t you just talk to your OH? There are so many people on this site who complain about OHs or families, but won’t actually speak to them! They probably think everything is ok but you are a bit of a moaning minnie. We are fortunate in having a cleaner and a gardener but if the lawn needs cutting (I can’t do it because of my knees) I do have to ask OH more than once! Life is surely too short to put up with a life that you obviously aren’t enjoying. These are modern times and women don’t have to be walked all over like a rug!

I'm afraid you are just moaning. But that's OK - we can cope with your moaning if it helps to get it off your chest.

I don't know how long you have been together, but the person to speak to about all this is your OH. Maybe you have lots of annoying habits that he just accepts and puts up with.

Sounds as if you spend all your time together and never do anything as individuals.

A recipe for getting irritated with each other in any relationship.

I think the answer is not to be so reliant on him for company.

You have a choice: tell him straight that he has to start pulling his weight around the house or just continue to pick up the slack for him and resent him for it. Only you can decide if it's a deal breaker.

PS can’t you go out on your own to places he hates, then meet up for coffee?

Well MrOops, pops out for milk if we run out and will often buy me a cake whilst he is there and if I ask him he will take the bins out, he also fuels up the cars and that’s it.
The rest I do, but it doesn’t bother me, we’ve been married for over 50 years and it’s the way things have worked out, I’m sure if I asked him he would do more and if I’m ill he will do it all, we don’t go out at the moment due to mixing with too many people, but in normal years we go out for lunch or away for the weekends to get out.
Every relationship is different.
But if you want to change the balance of who does what, you need to speak to him and (sorry to say) stop moaning to us ?
(Actually I love putting the tree and the decorations up)