Sleeping around

Beswitched

sazz1

My step sister was a virgin bride as she was a strong practicing RC.
She married for life to an abusive man and is still with him.
Most people I know had multiple partners before marriage or a settled living together relationship. Times are different now and I don't judge anyone as its individual choice. Each to their own.

I'm not sure what your point is. I live in Ireland which was a strongly RC country up to a generation ago. Lots of people were virgin Brides and went on to have very happy marriages. Your post is actually quite narrow minded and insulting.

Women sadly marry abusive men. Some of them are virgins, some of them have had previous sexual partners, some have had many. There is no co relation.

How is saying 'Each to their own' insulting? It is literally saying, everyone has the right to make their own choice.

Well I think people who say hundreds are probably exaggerating, but I see no problem with having sex for the sake of having sex, not everyone is looking for a life partner.
I wish I’d tried out a few more, been a bit more experimental, I also wish one of my daughters had not settled for the first man who came along.
As someone said to me recently, she didn’t have many regrets, but she wish she had been more of a slut.

sazz1

My step sister was a virgin bride as she was a strong practicing RC.
She married for life to an abusive man and is still with him.
Most people I know had multiple partners before marriage or a settled living together relationship. Times are different now and I don't judge anyone as its individual choice. Each to their own.

I'm not sure what your point is. I live in Ireland which was a strongly RC country up to a generation ago. Lots of people were virgin Brides and went on to have very happy marriages. Your post is actually quite narrow minded and insulting.

Women sadly marry abusive men. Some of them are virgins, some of them have had previous sexual partners, some have had many. There is no co relation.

My step sister was a virgin bride as she was a strong practicing RC.
She married for life to an abusive man and is still with him.
Most people I know had multiple partners before marriage or a settled living together relationship. Times are different now and I don't judge anyone as its individual choice. Each to their own.

Sex is not just about love nor is it a filtering process Sex is a biological need that is enjoyable to fulfill Many women me included enjoy sex and have had several partners or even numerous partners Providing contraception sensible safer sex precautions and consent from all parties concerned are in place Enjoy !

Who would think that we (well, most of us) belong to the generation that 'discovered' THE PILL!

Beswitched

It just seems sad and sordid to me, completely divorcing sex from love and commitment, falling into bed with someone you met in a club a few hours ago, doing the same with someone else a few days later.
It may be consensual but it also seems to lack self esteem and self respect. Like a previous poster I would be sad and disappointed if a child of mine behaved like that.

... but people have been having sex without love and commitment since time immemorial (or time 'immoral' as my mother used to say!) - particularly men. And that's not likely to change.

Also, assuming that women accumulate their partners by going out clubbing and "falling into bed" with someone they've only met hours earlier, is not necessarily the pattern for all women. Some just have many 'partners' for a given period of time - who is to say that their relationship, though possibly brief - is one without affection?

I don't see what is sordid or sad about two people who are mutually attracted having consensual sex and not ending up in a committed relationship. If they are both like-minded and enjoy it together why should they be lacking in self-esteem and self-respect?

A young man I know had a brief-fling with someone and, having met up with her much later by accident, became good friends with her.

People are different. It's as simple as that.

Riverwalk

Let's not pretend sleeping around is something new!

In any large group of women, particularly younger ones, there will be a sizeable proportion who sleep around.

It's nearly 50 years since I started nurse training and there were quite a few very active colleagues, as at the teacher training colleges which then were overwhelming female.

Nothing new under the sun.

Thanks for adding the sweeping statement about teacher training establishments Riverwalk I hope you have examples or was it just hearsay.
I certainly was not promiscuous and neither were any of my friends, The one that I went to had a lot of male students. What I found was the girls from all-girls schools were much more nieve where boys were concerned whereas the ones who had been to coed schools knew the signs to watch out for. I never fell for the poor me I don't know how to do my washing or to make beds come and see my etchings.
I did have the chance to observe nurses though and they hunted the young Dr's in packs so obvious .
People have always slept around but I do not think you can attribute it to any one profession except the oldest in the world and at least they got payed for it.
As I have heard one teenager say "It is only a vaginal sneeze untill the sneeze turns into a coldsore'.

When my mother was in the ATS she was engaged to my father but of course didn't see him for months on end. She became friendly with George a young sergeant who was also seperated from his fiancee. They used to go to dances and the cinema together rather than go alone. Both fiancees knew about the arrangement. I mentioned this to some girls I was working with a few years ago and was surprised by the reaction. How disgusting to go out with another man when you were engaged!!! It seemed that they couldn't imagine an evening out that didn't involve sex and certainly couldn't believe that it was a platonic relationship. I didn't dare tell them that my mother didn't have sex till she was married - after a 7 year engagement! They would probably imploded.

LaCrepescule

Absolute nonesense Beswitched and judgey and offensive beyond belief.

Why is it nonsense? Just because it is not your view doesn'make it nonsense. Rather ironic that you are calling other people judgmental and offensive.

Esspee

I must be old fashioned. For me sex is a very important part of a loving committed relationship. I can’t imagine sleeping around would give me any satisfaction at all.

If you're old fashioned so am I.

Not sure they’d actually be boasting, merely answering the question? I naively assumed at 18 that I’d only ever have sex with my fiance from there on in. Now, in my 50s, the thought of only having sex with the same person for the rest of my life horrifies me! Although this wouldn’t suit all.

Purplepixie

I couldn’t be bothered with it when I was young and certainly not now. Oh I feel a headache coming on!

Has anyone watched Silent Witness? Honestly they seemed to hop into bed with the first thing with a pulse! Again, where are my paracetamols?

I thought they didn’t have a pulse on silent witness……

Oops grammar could improve ☺️

Do others think mum's should stay on Mumsnet and not complain about grans or complain about grans on Mumsnet just as this post is not on Mumsnet complaint about mum's. It was something I was wondering last week. My views on this post apart from that have been aired

I agree Espee.

Perhaps I should have had less sex and paid more attention to proof reading posts

I must be old fashioned. For me sex is a very important part of a loving committed relationship. I can’t imagine sleeping around would give me any satisfaction at all.

I would actually worry a bit for my daughter (imaginary only have sons) if she hadnt had a few partners. There a lots of marriages that I see where it would have been better for everyone of they had slept together and then moved on.

50 is not such a high number if you do the math.

3 partners per year (not at all excessive) x 15 years of being single = 45.

I hope I have helped my adult children keep safe. I don't care for all the talk around promiscuity, it is up to them. They had a different life and family judgement to what I had and it is a welcome relief that they have CHOICE

No one has to get married or have a monogamous relationship if they don't want to

Are the posters on Mumsnet talking about the equivalent of trying on fifty pairs of shoes before finding the perfectly fitting pair, or about continuing to audition try another fifty men after they have selected Mr Right-for-the-part and promised him that they are a perfect pair "until death do us part" ? There is a great deal of difference.

I agree with Beswitched and suspect many of us do. I think you’re the only person to have said they were promiscuous and have slept with a lot of men. No one has openly judged you personally so please don’t judge others on here whose views and experiences are different to yours.

Absolute nonesense Beswitched and judgey and offensive beyond belief.

It just seems sad and sordid to me, completely divorcing sex from love and commitment, falling into bed with someone you met in a club a few hours ago, doing the same with someone else a few days later.
It may be consensual but it also seems to lack self esteem and self respect. Like a previous poster I would be sad and disappointed if a child of mine behaved like that.