Parents deliberately winding up children

VioletSky exactly

The OP said the child was a toddler so could be anything from 1 - 3 years.

The father has obviously got carried away interacting/playing with his child, the moment someone asked him to quieten down he did. End of noise and end of the problem.

That is a young age to discover how many adults are miserable and boring having forgotten how to be silly and make each other, and especially children, laugh.

GrannyGravy13

Vintagejazz

GrannyGravy13

So a Father interacting with his child is wrong, maybe it was a little bit too loud, but I would rather see parent child interaction than all sat with their heads in individual devices.

Why does it have to be either or? I see many parents interacting with their children in restaurants without encouraging such a racket it ruins other customers meals.

If the child was too noisy due to their Father playing with the and when it was pointed out to the Father the situation was resolved, all was fine.

No all was not fine, the father should have had more sense than to do it in the first place lockdown or not.
A place where other people go to eat is not a venue for a display of noisy father parenting. I wonder if he does it at home in the middle of a football match or Rugby on T.V.? Some people, men in particular seem to think they are displaying their superior parenting skills. Though only do it when in public. If you want to be noisy take your children to a noisy venue where there are a lot of other noisy parents.
Why spoil someone else's treat of eating out. As another gran has pointed out they take crayons and games to keep children entertained and if I were honest I would rather see them on an I pad if that works than wandering around getting under waiters' feet or putting on a display of gurning and loud laughter for all.
Why should a member of the public put themselves at risk by telling them to quieten down,the chap might have turned aggressive I think it was very brave of him.

At some point, we start 'socialising' our children so that they can interact with other people, and become 'civilised'.

Encouraging a child to shriek and scream in an environment where adults are expecting to have a meal and good conversation indicates a lack of maturity on the part of the father.

There are plenty of ways to interact with children - they are very receptive if you give them your attention.

We used to take my then 4-year old to various restaurants and we chatted to him about the food, its preparation - what he liked (or didn't), what he'd like to do when he 'grew up' and, more immediately, what he'd like to do the next day. We talked to him and listened to his replies. Most children will respond to that. If they're very young you might need to entertain them rather than 'chat'... and that can be more problematic. Having said that, when he was 2 we took him for his first pub lunch, and he just sat for the whole 45 or so minutes (we made it a quick visit) with wide eyes and open mouth staring at everything and everyone and watching the waiters come and go... he'd never sat in a room eating with so many people before, and was agog with the novelty of it. And then his eyes closed and he fell asleep, and we left... before he woke up and got 'cranky', which would have been irritating to the other customers.

I'm with GrannyGravy13 on this. Whilst I wouldn't much like the noise, I'd prefer to see a father engaging with his child in a positive way than not engaging at all or engaging negatively. I'd also prefer the child was laughing to grizzling. I also think it depends on the place you are frequenting. If it is a family pub, you are probably being unreasonable, if it is a more sedate sort of place, you aren't.

Well I’d have welcomed some ear muffs yesterday afternoon! One dog set the others off.

1summer

We went out for lunch yesterday with daughter SIL and our just 2 years old granddaughter. We had books, stickers and colouring books to keep her amused in her high chair. But she is so talkative, she said hello lady or hello man to everyone around her and then wanted to chat. Asking what they were eating and drinking or telling them all about her. We find it extremely amusing but are aware others don’t. You cant tell a 2 year old to be quiet and trying to distract her doesn’t always work. But we don’t see it as bad behaviour but hoping she learns to be a bit quieter as she gets older.

I would find that cute. Very different from encouraging a child to scream over and over, until another customer has to ask you to stop.

There are a good many dog-friendly eating places in my area where well behaved dogs are welcome. They are generally much quieter and better behaved than the children.

Totally agree with you on this Riverwalk. The days of a man in a flat cap taking his whippet down the pub while he enjoys a quiet pint are long gone!

I agree about dogs. I stopped eating at a local pub - last visit there were four in close proximity to our table.

It's a gastropub, with restaurant prices (£10+ for a large glass of wine) and all tables and seating are designed for eating - it's not a boozer where it's reasonable for man and his dog to have a pint! The dogs were well-behaved and on leads but a couple were snuffling around and it's not what I want when eating out.

Whether it's children or dogs many people are self-absorbed with little regard for others.

But she is so talkative, she said hello lady or hello man to everyone around her and then wanted to chat. Asking what they were eating and drinking or telling them all about her

I'd enjoy that! ?
And be happy to have a chat

Not so sure about a toddler being encouraged to shriek and scream though. Well done the man who spoke up.

Urmstongran

This wasn’t an eating place Calendargirl but I do agree with you on that. It’s off putting to watch dog owners feed their pets morsels of food from their plates. Ugh!

In our neck of the woods, dogs can order their own bowls of food in lots of eating establishments! ?

Children should be taught there is a time and a place for being noisy or energetic, and public places is not one of them. When surrounded by other people they should be kept calm and encouraged to sit quietly. Restaurants, public transport, waiting rooms etc. When they are in their garden or the park or at home they can make as much noise as they like.
Sadly this doesn't happen.

This wasn’t an eating place Calendargirl but I do agree with you on that. It’s off putting to watch dog owners feed their pets morsels of food from their plates. Ugh!

Calendargirl

GrannyGravy13

Just a thought if the child was young it was a lockdown baby (as are our youngest two GC) and they are not as used to going out to eat or socialising as children born pre-Covid.

A lockdown dad also, I suppose.

Well we all lockdown citizens at some point over the last two years.

He calmed down when it was pointed out, so I really cannot see what the problem is, if he had continued it would be something to complain about.

I find tables of noisy intoxicated adults far more offensive than the laughter of children.

Urmstongran as someone who is extremely allergic to dogs, and it’s getting more severe with age I would have had to leave the bar.

Definitely paws on the floor never should dogs or any other animal be allowed on seating in a public place.

GrannyGravy13

Just a thought if the child was young it was a lockdown baby (as are our youngest two GC) and they are not as used to going out to eat or socialising as children born pre-Covid.

A lockdown dad also, I suppose.

Re dogs, I just avoid any food place that welcomes them.

Not that I go out to eat much.

Just a thought if the child was young it was a lockdown baby (as are our youngest two GC) and they are not as used to going out to eat or socialising as children born pre-Covid.

We went out for lunch yesterday with daughter SIL and our just 2 years old granddaughter. We had books, stickers and colouring books to keep her amused in her high chair. But she is so talkative, she said hello lady or hello man to everyone around her and then wanted to chat. Asking what they were eating and drinking or telling them all about her. We find it extremely amusing but are aware others don’t. You cant tell a 2 year old to be quiet and trying to distract her doesn’t always work. But we don’t see it as bad behaviour but hoping she learns to be a bit quieter as she gets older.

And dogs.... ❤️ me ❤️ my dog seems to be par for the course in Urmston town centre. Yesterday afternoon we wandered over to our favourite bar. 3 dogs in there, quiet enough so fair play. One owner though picked his little dog up and sat it on the chair next to him. Oh no! ? dog bums on seats, not nice. ‘Paws on the floor’ ought to be the mantra in public places. Then another couple with a dog came in, so 4 in total now and it was barking at the other dogs so much. “It’s like Battersea dog’s home in here” said Himself. We like dogs (we’ve had 3 over the years) but come on people, have some consideration!

The father should have had more awareness of his surroundings GG. With any luck, he'll have learned a valuable lesson.

I also think there are loads of ways for parents to interact without all the shrieking. But I do think the father was probably just enjoying hearing his child laugh, without realising the noise levels. He's probably used to doing it at home where he doesn't annoy anyone.

I hate it when children are crying, especially very young ones, and all the mother can do is yell at them. The child is already upset, and sometimes tired and hungry, what is the point of yelling at them to upset them further???

And it is often the dads who get little children all hyped up just before bedtime, then wonder why they are too excited to settle down and go to sleep.

As for the restaurant incident, when will people realise the whole world doesn’t revolve around their child?