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Outdoor shoes - on or off?

(177 Posts)
NannyB2604 Mon 20-Jun-22 12:44:45

Just wondering what others think or do. Is it ever acceptable to ask someone to take their outdoor shoes off when coming into your house? Or should you (as I do at present) hope for the best and grin and bear it if they don't? We have beige carpets throughout (there when we bought the house) and can't afford (don't want) to replace them with something more practical at least for the time being. Any opinions on this?

Jaxjacky Tue 21-Jun-22 13:43:01

Only the grandchildren take their shoes off, I’m not really sure why, it’s never occurred to me to ask other people to remove theirs.
Tradesman have if coming through the front door onto carpet, I expect they do at every house.

BlueBelle Tue 21-Jun-22 13:44:17

Not a working class habit ?
I ve never had any friends take their shoes off when visiting me and I ve never been to anyone who has asked me to

HazelEyes Tue 21-Jun-22 13:54:55

Yes, if guests don't offer to take their shoes off I ask them! It is unhygienic to wear outdoor shoes in the house and people will be transfering soil, bacteria, viruses, pollen etc from outside. Bacteria like E. coli is extremely common on the outside of the shoes. I simply like to keep my carpets, rug, tiles and wooden flooring clean. If workmen need to come in and need the protection of their shoes I provide shoe covers for them! Although usually they have them. Anyone think they may change their minds?!

GTDevon Tue 21-Jun-22 14:03:00

I think it is very rude not to ask whether you should take your shoes off when entering someone else’s home. We are a shoeless house and everyone piles up their shoes in the hall. Who cares if it looks a bit untidy… Nobody we know wears shoes indoors. Taking off your shoes just becomes a habit. I would not mind if a visitor had a genuine reason for leaving theirs on.

Neilspurgeon0 Tue 21-Jun-22 14:04:02

Almost everyone I know takes their shoes off in the porch, often before ringing the bell. It may be lower class but it is exceedingly useful in the foul weather mostly encountered in Britain,Mandy I would rather be thought lower (working) class than a crass uppity dirt bag.

Sasta Tue 21-Jun-22 14:18:23

I was brought up in a busy happy shoes on household. I never remember ever having slippers even for a gift. When we bought our first home and carpets, a friend took her shoes off at the door. I said you don’t need to do that. Her reply stayed with me, ‘you wouldn’t walk all over a brand new woollen jumper with outdoor shoes, so why do it on a carpet?’ It made sense and we became a no shoes household. A neighbour and I had daughters at the same time, she asked me how come my daughter’s cream tights were really clean at the end of the day and her daughters were quite literally black in places by teatime. I told her and she was surprised it made so much difference. They became a no shoes household after that too. People and animals leave awful things on the ground outdoors, I don’t want that in my home. That said, I couldn’t make anybody uncomfortable asking them to remove shoes, hence a relative left dog poo on every other step when using the upstairs loo, and managed to hit the ones she missed on the way down stairs. She never knew. ?

Harmonypuss Tue 21-Jun-22 15:09:26

He up being told outdoor shoes are exactly that, for outdoors, so have always either just taken my shoes off or at the very least offered.
When it comes to people coming into my home, no-one makes it beyond my (lino) kitchen without taking shoes off.

Modompodom Tue 21-Jun-22 15:09:49

I have only once been asked to remove my shoes when visiting, I was fine with that. Before I moved, I used to be invited to meals with my neighbours, who were muslim. I used to automatically take my shoes off on entering, and I also used to dress appropriately.

Fernhillnana Tue 21-Jun-22 15:33:54

Everyone removes shoes in my house except my naughty husband. He gets told off for it frequently but he does have a bad back and finds it difficult to keep bending down.

Liz62 Tue 21-Jun-22 15:46:22

In some cultures its considered bad manners to not remove them.
I generally take my shoes off when I go in someone's house, especially if they have nice carpets, my house is also a shoes off house, my carpets are cream ,weren't cheap & I aim to make them last, also having read an article on what's on the bottom of even clean shoes & having a grandson who is crawling it's a no brainer, luckily most if my family & friends are all the same opinion & these days any decent tradesmen have shoe protectors to slip over the top.

mrsgreenfingers56 Tue 21-Jun-22 15:51:31

I always take my shoes off when I go to other peoples houses, think only polite to be honest. Myself and other half always take ours off when we come in. We had new carpets and bought a lovely new mat and hubby came in and wiped his foot and boy there was this dreadful smell and he had walked dog dirt all down the hall and on the mat! Oh the air was blue with the new carpets so stained it was horrible so always, always shoes off for us. To get round visitors coming bought new ladies and gents slippers and put them in the hall and visitors got the hint. Replaced every few months but as had no visitors during Covid slippers still nice!
But of course each to their own as they say.

Happysexagenarian Tue 21-Jun-22 15:54:06

We wear our outdoor shoes in the house, I really couldn't be bothered with changing my shoes every time I came in! We don't have slippers or house shoes. As we have a dog who likes to dig in the garden I really don't worry too much about dirty floors. Our house only has carpet on the stairs and in bedrooms, everywhere else is wood which gets steam cleaned every 2-3 weeks because of our dog. The carpets are washed every 3 months for same reason.

I wouldn't dream of asking visitors to remove their shoes, and I don't offer when I visit other people, but if they specifically ask me to remove them I will (while muttering resentfully under my breath).

If people are that fussy about their floors or choose to have very pale carpets they should use rugs or floor protectors.

mariella22 Tue 21-Jun-22 16:27:25

The reason for removing outdoor shoes is not really cosmetic ie keeping your pale carpets clean.
It is to avoid transferring traces of seagull droppings , animal droppings , food remains and other unhealthy things to your inside floors.. where you may walk barefoot at times or worse .. a small child may sit on the carpet to play .... rub their eyes and possibly become very ill with eg toxoplasmosis, from cat poo,which is life threatening .. I learned this thankfully from my Norwegian daughterinlaw

Fiona44 Tue 21-Jun-22 16:51:55

I live in Italy and, not only is it automatic to remove shoes before entering a house (no carpets, all hard floors), and putting on slippers (sort of flip flops without the in between the toe bit) but feet must never come into direct contact with the floor. Even going to the loo in the night, my OH would never dream of not, immediately on getting out of bed, putting on slippers without his feet first touching the floor. Me wandering around in bare feet, washed before getting into bed, was greeted with genuine astonishment ? Cultural differences, rather than carpet preservation, but interesting nonetheless.

grandtanteJE65 Tue 21-Jun-22 16:58:00

I would not feel comfortable insisting that people took of their shoes unless the shoes were very obviously wet or dirty.

I also feel that if you do insist on this, you should have slippers or thick socks you can offer all your guests.

And however fine the no shoes policy may be on everyday occasions, what about formal parties in the home?

Are these no longer held anywhere? Surely if you are having a formal party in your home, you cannot possible expect visitors to take off their shoes?

Cabbie21 Tue 21-Jun-22 17:09:39

After reading all the comments, I wonder if those who insist on shoes off would include their elderly grandad who cannot bend easily and has foot problems?

Audun Tue 21-Jun-22 17:10:33

Interesting.! have lived in Norway, Sweden and Germany, where it is normal to take shoes off. This is a farm, and we always change shoes at the back door. Although we have wooden floors, which I vacuum every day, it's incredible to see the amount of dust, so outdoor shoes or boots would just be silly! . No 'class' involved, just hygiene.

Silvertwigs Tue 21-Jun-22 17:14:32

NannyB2604 I was brought up to take my shoes off in other peoples houses but the often say ‘don’t bother with that’. I have a lot of Asian friends and all the trades are Asian where I live, they take their shoes off automatically.

Doodledog Tue 21-Jun-22 17:38:46

I would never ask people to remove shoes, and have very rarely been asked to do so. Many of my children's friends used to take their shoes off (unasked) when they visited, but these days nobody does. I have a wooden floor in the hall, a stout doormat and a vacuum cleaner for the sitting room carpet. Very few people come to the back door, but we come in that way if we've been out in the car. The back door opens to a room at the back of the kitchen, where wellies and similar are kept, but now that we have neither dogs nor resident children they are rarely used. If I came in in muddy wellies, I might take them off, and of course I wouldn't dream of going to someone else's house wearing them, but it just doesn't happen nowadays.

I would be very averse to wearing someone else's slippers if offered, and whilst I might take my own if I were staying at a friend's house overnight, it wouldn't occur to me to take them if I went for coffee.

I tend to leave my shoes off when I'm indoors and walk about in stockinged (or bare) feet, but I don't take them off at the door - I come in, take my coat off, pick up the mail or whatever, go to the loo, get a cup of coffee, do whatever else is necessary before settling down, and then take them off in the sitting room to put my feet up. I wear slippers if it's cold, but am barefoot otherwise, unless I pop into the garden to hang our washing or put something in the bin, in which case I slip them on.

nexus63 Tue 21-Jun-22 20:32:29

i would never ask anyone coming to visit but i had to ask some workmen that my housing had got in to change the water system, they had boots covered in cement and mud, they were not happy but they put on the little blue overshoes, all except one, he had to clean my carpet with a little scrubber sponge and my hoover ....boss told him before i had the chance. i think most people would say if they had dirty shoes on and leave them at the door.

Doodledog Tue 21-Jun-22 21:01:21

I think that's completely different from visitors, nexus. I would have been furious at that, and I'm pleased his boss made him clean it up.

Grandma70s Tue 21-Jun-22 21:22:04

Well, this has been an enlightening thread - and to me rather a weird one. There’s a whole world of shoe-removing out there that I have almost never encountered. I have only once come across it in my entire life.

Rosie51 Tue 21-Jun-22 21:39:01

I do know some people who like you to remove your shoes and will do so but I'd never ask anyone to remove their shoes. Some of my adult children still remove shoes when they visit but that's their choice. At home I take them off at some point but never just inside the front door. I do wonder if the shoes off people ever have pets, how do they cope with a dog or cat who will have walked on the same pavements etc before walking on their floors?

Goldieoldie15 Wed 22-Jun-22 01:07:03

In Australia and New Zealand ALL visitors take their shoes off as a matter of course. And leave them outside the front door. But that’s colonials for you eh.

mjr1552 Wed 22-Jun-22 01:21:16

When my kids were crawling I kept a shoes off policy. Only two people objected. A 2yr old and a 68yr old. I bribed the 2yr old with a chocolate biscuit and told the 68yr old to grow up.